Cat In My Lap

Addicted 2 Decorating: D.I.Y. Project:: Turning A Headboard And Footboard Into A Bench

2011-11-09T17:41:00.000+11:30

Addicted 2 Decorating: D.I.Y. Project:: Turning A Headboard And Footboard Into A Bench

The Last Straw

2011-10-22T05:28:00.000+11:30

When drug companies post information about a competitor can that possibly be informative or unbiased? Of course not..is it legal? Sure it is. Go ahead and slam the other company before it is readily available to the public.

This is not by any means a new innovative practice. It is done all the time...whether it involves dish detergents, air conditioners or drugs. What has gotten my dander up today is the article written by the Chantix legal team or
more specifically the Legal Lawsuit team slamming Cysticine.

Cysticine is another smoking cessation product, used in Europe for decades. It is cheaper and is effective in most cases. So far as I can see the adverse effects are not as dramatic as Chantix.

Chantix has had the unfortunate reputation of being a mind or mood altering product causing ,in some cases suicide, and weird behavior. In my case.....non stop vomiting, when taken as directed. Did I stop smoking? You bet I did. I stopped eating, smoking and sleeping.

I gave this product three tries. The first time it worked like a charm. No side effects, no smoking. I had my surgery and I lit up leaving the hospital parking lot. Shame on me. Outright pain or discomfort does this to me, I smoke. Second and third time not so much success.....the vomiting and or feeling nauseous ninety percent of my waking hours wasn't at all comfortable. Lifestyle was hampered, I actually could not go grocery shopping with this green feeling.

When I read about Cysticine I was newly encouraged that this may just be the ticket. I have tried Zyban and patches etc having no effect whatsoever. Hey, an addiction is an addiction....it is all the same, your brain tells your body you need this poison and come rain or shine you will get it.

Is it because Cysticine is made from trees grown only in southern Europe? Does the FDA frown upon natural products? You bet....they want to close down supplement manufacturers with a passion. To me, this only indicates that this a viable product and we smokers are doomed to smoke and provide the tobacco companies with uninterrupted revenue, or keep the drug companies churning out 'puke pills' with abandon.

Let me reiterate....this is all legal. Until enough smokers have taken a nose dive off of a bridge or gone mad in a McDonalds and shot up the clientele Chantix will be a valuable product. They have generously included a warning on each packet....may cause psychosis...to avoid any further liability.

On the other hand...if I were to contact a pharmacy in Bulgaria via the internet and order Cysticine, I may just invite the local SWAT team to confiscate this product.

Actually, all I am asking is to be given the opportunity to make up my own mind and take the risks. I do not want to be told by some entity that this is bad for me when in actuality it is a political issue. Drug companies have deep, deep pockets having endless influence on our lawmakers.

If, when and until this is resolved I will be supporting the tobacco companies , much to my dismay. I am just flat out of will power I need assistance.

Got a beef? Let me know. There are enough out there to fill a library. Until next time...be safe. RD

My Game State is out of Sync

2011-09-21T03:09:00.000+11:30

When this kept coming up on one of my games on Facebook I thought, hey, that's how I feel. I know its there somewhere, out in the beyond but I can't quite get it to mesh with what I'm trying to do. Occasionally everything falls into place...well, I help it along by keeping in touch, keeping current, and sticking my nose to the grindstone.

I don't particularly need to be told what to do next. Heck, I can see it for myself. Wishing for three teams to come in and give me a hand is 'pie in the sky'. I used to think that this was a possibility...no kidding. I told myself that it would happen....it didn't...and now I am stuck trying to clean up a mess that has been languishing and growing for some years.

I'm not exaggerating.....I went from 'who cares', to Oh my god, and now picking up what is left. I do sometimes feel that there was a death somewhere close. And it was me! All the spark, humor, positive thoughts vanished. If I gave excuses that would be just it....excuses. I don't feel justified to just curl up and die....as much as I would just like to disappear. Maybe just for a little while.

Life can hand you some pretty awful curve balls. How you handle them is the ultimate test. What I'm trying to say and do is to not necessarily pick up where I left off....that would be suicidal, but go on. That being said I know I have moments of real creativity, but I have learned that sharing my ideas to my family is useless. Yeah, you do crave some positive feedback, but since it isn't there, and never will be, I need to suck it up and 'do it.'

Now I'm not saying I'm a frustrated artist, nor a frustrated writer, just damn frustrated. That has been the case for just too long and I'm tired of it. I imagine my depressing blogs are just as tiring to read. Sorry, it was just a journaling thing that I would vent my spleen. That is not to say I woke this morning and felt it was all over, a new and better me was emerging...Not likely. I still need to get a handle on the damn mess.

I've come to realize that life is short. Making the best of things as they are isn't an option, you really need to get up and out and see what is going on. Being disagreeable has gotten nothing in return. How idiotic the notion that you can change someone, especially when you need a whole lot of changin yourself. That is over. It was time consuming, degrading, and oh so unrewarding. Now come on....who needs that.?

I do have a more than passing interest in animal advocacy. However, the reality is you can't do too much sitting at home at your desk and weeping every time some dysfunctional human clobbers and innocent animal or child, or some unsuspecting, undeserving human. These are battles that seem to have no end game in sight. Yes, you must keep aware and informed but then there are the everyday things that need attention as well.

By everyday things....I've got a sanctuary to run. I've got elderly dogs and cats that need attention and medications. My frustrations with the vet world are loud and clear. I've got a bunch of cats that were unexpected who need care and feeding and vetting. Enough already.

I've got a house that is temporarily saved from the auction block that needs tremendous TLC. And I'm not blowing smoke when I say that .... it is too kind....I really need a demo crew. I know that the helping hand I was hoping for just isn't there. That was a real wake-up call in itself. You do it or it falls apart...and in some cases it did.

I have some plans of action in mind, they do not include teams, helping hands or anything of that nature, it requires me to get up and go , when I'm able, and 'git er done', one way or another.

Coming to terms with what is real is the big victory today. My game state may be out of sync temporarily but I ain't dead yet!

Be safe. Until next time. RD

Afterthoughts.

2011-08-14T16:46:00.000+11:30

Clearly a useless past time of mine. Afterthinking something that was important at the time but I wasn't quite into the 'give and take' of the situation. Oh, I used to be a snappy comeback queen. At least I thought so. If I could make the opponent shut up that was a victory for me. Just don't start...OK?

I am no longer that comeback queen....in fact, I barely listen. This is what aging has done for me....I just don't give a damn most of the time, Mostly it has 100% to do with the person who is trying to get a rise out of me. You are familiar to near boring death of what is about to come out of their mouth. If you do catch a few phrases you are not disappointed ....here we go again.

Lately, in our impoverished state, the argument of most unjustifiable. and unsubstantiated crap is what the cats and dogs eat! I went out on a limb earlier and began concocting recipes that I thought would have the nutritional elements needed for a healthy diet, plus being cost effective.

When you do this type of thing the initial layout can be an eye opener, but as time progresses and you continue and streamline your efforts; it is not as time consuming nor expensive as canned anything. So I merrily thought this was a good thing....I am told on a nearly daily basis how foolish I am.

I cannot, for the life of me, understand how in the name of everything that is sacred that this has become a contentious issue. He, who has no love for animals in general, he who wouldn't be able to detect anything amiss in a cat or dog, has now elevated his status to "master of the animal kingdom".

Yes, we have gotten 'suddenly poor'....no,never in my thirties or forties did I foresee what the future might bring in the guise of health issues or financial issues. Would it have been logical to think back then." Oh I want to save the world of homeless animals so I will take them all in no matter what the future brings?"..Of course not...but that is what WE did and now we must make numerous sacrifices to keep up the menagerie. I might add including adoption.

But this is the issue that has a monotonous refrain day after day. I cannot stop it, so I simply block it out and continue what I am doing. Of course there may be some truth to this argument....if we didn't have cats and dogs we would be better off financially. My response is .....get another career. Now that is just as ridiculous.

Sometimes there is light at the end of the tunnel, and then again it too fades. So you must be up for anything. Take it or leave it. And in most instances you do not have that choice...you must do something. For now our home has been saved...that should be great news. It is and it isn't....I hate this place, but it is the only place for now.

Bob has taken a great pleasure in telling me daily how really old I am. Like this is from a spring chicken? I began taking this to heart...I look in the mirror and see a stranger; one who has aged 25 years at least these past ten unhappy years. Once it sags....you are sunk....unless you have the means to get it pulled back. But it isn't just the issue about looks changing its attitude....that changes as well.

I'm not thrilled about where my attitude is taking me or not taking me. I need an attitude change. Digging deep within me I will either come up with a rose or an empty hand. It is those days where I don't give a damn that frighten me.

Here is to digging deeper, finding a real keeper. Please be careful out there. Until next time. rd

Dream On

2011-07-26T07:24:00.000+11:30

Don't you just hold back a yawn when your best friend tells you his or her dream . Well, go ahead yawn....get it over with. I too had a dream. I suppose I dream just as much or as little as the next person...but generally I'm not a rememberer. Nor do I actually share them with anyone since I too am a yawner.

Here goes.....I won a house. In Sweden. It was so ordinary,so plain, nothing that could be called 'that wow factor'. But.....it was free! That was enough wow for me. I went in....it was open, sun streaming in from all sides, including tubes inserted into the ceilings to let more sun in. I was in love.

The kicker was....I needed to furnish the house exclusively with IKEA products. I do so love IKEA that didn't seem to be a problem...just made me more excited to get on with it.

I must have completed every room. This includes bathrooms and outdoor decks. All grey and white and a hint of ice blue. I really do like this scheme, but I don't have a thing in my current home anything like that.

Here is the unusual part.....I continued sleeping. But I awoke in the family room around 3:30 am paging through my IKEA catalog.If asked....I couldn't tell you where it was. I hadn't looked at it in ages. Why get myself all excited over nothing. The nearest location of a store is in Washington D.C. ...fat chance I would be going there any time soon. Lets not even talk about the expense account...it is non existent.

All in all it was quite lovely. I felt at home at last. My current address is quite the opposite. Dark, hot, heavy, and did I say dark? Not at all to my liking. walls hung with things I no longer look at, or care about. Just an unpleasant place for me.

Now I will tell you quite truthfully I have been under enormous stress. Singly, each challenge is quite manageable, but again it requires a McIver attitude to reach any kind of conclusion. Time and time again I am asked to accomplish the near impossible, with thought and time I can with the help of my daughter.

This time it is different. It is all happening at once, and requires immediate satisfaction. If the hand sander fails , as it did, I can't just go out and replace it. I must finish that damn foyer makeover regardless. Weeks later, after a short incapacitation and much agonizing over the hand sander, Bob comes in from the dreaded ssssssssssssssssssssnake barn with another sander. I believe he found some joy in handing it to me like didn't you know it was there? Damnit, no I did not.So that project is underway.....again.

Then my daughter, my helper, comes down with a serious pain. Hip pain....so off we go after a reasonable wait to see my hip doc. X-rays taken, MRI taken nope it isn't in need of hip surgery. Well, what is it? She asks for pain meds since she is no longer comfortable walking, sitting, or sleeping....here ya go kiddo...take some Tylenol and you will feel great. Not so.

Let me explain....we do not get pain meds here in Virginia and Maryland. I have no idea what has changed but docs will not prescribe. So I spent futile days on the internet trying my best to get something that is 1) non addictive2) won't burn a hole in a stomach, and did I mention is not a synthetic morphine? Or is reasonably priced. I did but haven't ordered because the next situation needed my attention.

Last year Bob inspected a home that was in foreclosure. It had been vacant for months if not a year or more. It was dark ( no electricity) stinky and obviously he was in a rush to get outta there. At that time he brought home fleas from this dump. I was beside myself....I had never encountered an infestation like this. Of course by the time your pets are itchy and scratching it has been under way for weeks if not months.

He must have done it again! It is the only explanation I can come up with. All the aforementioned critters have been on flea prevention 12 months of the year. Fleas do not go to south Florida for the winter, they like it here too much. This time it is worse than before....we cannot get a handle on it. Please...let me explain....we have 30 indoor cats, and three dogs , who do play in the yard. Now I have been on the internet constantly to find a perfect solution.

What I mean by a perfect solution is perfect for me....I can't , on my own, do the required all at once approach. Impossible. Nicci is laid up, Bob thinks this is woman's work and too gross for him. So I am trying to tackle all the places the cats go. That is upstairs and downstairs. Numerous rugs, wooden floors with wide gaps between floorboards, and I couldn't tell you how many kitty carpeted condos are around. Every one of them needs to be vacuumed, put spray on, or borax for carpets, wash bedding, then put new stuff on the cats, because Frontline didn't work. And catch these miserable teen cats to pop a Capstar down their little throats.

I'm still in the process. We are enduring a monster heatwave. These old houses were not built for 100 degree temperatures. Air conditioners are running....then not running...we experience kind of rolling brown outs. So we stay off our computers as much as possible for fear the house will explode.

I dreamt of a near perfect place.....I got to experience some solitude and silence. I did what I long to do, decorate a house from scratch. Plus....I got up in my slumber and found the IKEA catalog. Now that ain't bad afterall. Until next time keep safe, cool and well. RD

Alternatives

2011-06-13T10:58:00.000+11:30

Alternatives

Feel Good Books for Summer Reading.

2011-06-06T11:43:00.000+11:30

Directly from AbeBooks Newsletter here are the summer feel good selections:

I rarely, if ever, read a book for enlightenment to forget the cares of the day and wile away my time on pure feel-good or fantasy. Coming back into the real world after one of those reads must be a bit of a downer, well, it would for me. I'm strictly into crime, true or otherwise, historical novels,true or otherwise, and for more relaxation than I can hardly stand anything my neighbor lends me.

Life is just way too short to get bogged down in heavy stuff this summer. I have a room that is filled with just my how-to books.....I think I purchased them before the internet. I know now that I just need to pose a question and I am on my way to rewiring a lamp or how to speedify getting wallpaper down. They do come in handy once in a while.

I also collected cook books for a very long while. Unfortunately none of them deal strictly with frugal meals, and that is what I am into right at this moment. "How many ways to charm your guests with renditions of beans and rice". Its a good thing I am not asked to entertain any longer, it would put me beside myself.

I'm going to give a selection of these a try....it can't hurt. Here is a thought .... why did I wrongly think that the population here is not interested in reading? When I go to the library it is full of people, young and old. The books that I take home are filled with previous due dates. I think I should hang out there and meet some of these readers. And perhaps invite them over for'beans and rice'.

Until next time....be safe. rd

25 Feel-Good Reads

Still Life with Woodpecker
Tom Robbins

Lady Oracle
Margaret Atwood

Fried Green Tomatoes at the Whistle Stop Café
Fannie Flagg

Good-bye Mr. Chips
James Hilton

The Bean Trees
Barbara Kingsolver

The Art of Racing in the Rain
Garth Stein

Bel Canto
Ann Patchett

Thin Blue Smoke
Doug Worgul

Cold Comfort Farm
Stella Gibbons

Bridget Jones' Diary
Helen Fielding

Breakfast at Tiffany's
Truman Capote

Kitchen
Banana Yoshimoto

The Incredible Journey
Sheila Burnford

The Princess Bride
William Goldman

Crocodile on the Sandbank
Elizabeth Peters

Mrs. Pollifax and the Golden Triangle
Dorothy Gilman

Life after God
Douglas Coupland

Something Under the Bed is Drooling
Bill Watterson

Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day
Winifred Watson

Franny and Zooey
J.D. Salinger

Unless
Carol Shields

A Town Like Alice
Nevil Shute

The Anthologist
Nicholson Baker

High Fidelity
Nick Hornby

The Alchemist

I Remember Mama

2011-05-08T15:08:00.000+11:30

Of course, Mother's Day is tomorrow, why wouldn't I remember her? The fact of the matter is I remember her every day of my life. She is always with me, I talk to her telepathically each and every day. No longer seeking approval, but advice. Goodness knows I could use it.

She was always there it seemed, one way or another. She influenced my life more than she will ever know. Not unlike her in many ways, I struggle on with depression just as she did. I didn't know at the time that this was such a pervasive problem....or her mania which I secretly loved.

Her ups and downs were often maddening and exciting for a young child. When she was up....she flew with the birds and she would grab me and take me to the moon with her. She drove like the wind in her auto. Not reckless, but a heavy foot that brought her some semblance of peace. She flew along the roadways, often singing some of her youthful German songs. That is how I learned many of the songs that I strum in my mind now....singing along with mom.

She was so talented...she baked, served up feasts for so many friends and family. No one ever left hungry or felt ignored by her.

I really think she could do it all. She played the mandolin. The house would rock with music when each of the friends or relatives pulled out their instruments, my dad played the violin, my aunt the piano, accordions were pulled out and of course the popular harmonica. Quite a mix. In fact, one party got so loud a few glasses cracked....that's what I'm told.

When I began piano lessons she didn't want to feel left out or perhaps wanted to participate in my practice. She did well....she loved it....I didn't . She always wanted to learn new things, she'd master them and move on to the next.

She knit, sewed, embroidered, did a multitude of crafts. Her crowning jewels were her candles. No one ever left our home during the holidays without a candle. They were stunning.

She didn't have the patience or persistence to master just one thing. There were craft projects everywhere except her craft room, I think dad finally gave her the basement to clutter as she wanted. She had large banquet-like tables along the walls littered with her various projects. She always welcomed company and was so generous with her time to teach me or others what she was doing.

Then there were her animals....we had cats and dogs. Or she had cats and my dad had the dogs. Never a dull moment...when I came home from school telling her about a friend's litter of kittens she would drop everything and we'd zoom over there to see if they were being well taken care of. That is not to say we had a house full of animals...we didn't....but we never were without.

She was my Girl Scout leader...how embarrassing was that? Now I would be thrilled, but at the time I thought she was showing off, and picking on me. Kids! I remember the Christmas gifts we made under her direction.....soaps with cutout Christmas cards dipped in wax.

When I entered high school she became ill and I was shipped off to another state to attend boarding school. I missed her terribly, had all the usual teenage angst about being to blame. All the usual teen drama associated with being cast aside from the family but not neglected by the school . I grew resentful.

Now I understand quite well that she was suffering from an emotional illness, I would think it would be classified today as bi-polar, or something similar to that. She never really recovered. She was withdrawn, and her zest for life only reappeared when she had grandchildren to shower affection on.

Yes, I miss my mom. I wish I had been able to tell her so many things. I wanted her to know that I admired her and loved who she was, all of it. In many respects I have become the mirror image of her, I can truly say I can feel her pain and her joy.

I lost my mom a long while ago, but it seems like only yesterday. I'm grateful that I am able to talk with her every day, it matters so much to me. I miss you mom. xoxoxo

Before I Die Project....Candy Chang

2011-04-04T08:56:00.000+11:30

I read Candy Chang's presentation of a project that she initiated in New Orleans. She found an abandoned building and installed one wall of blackboard painted with lines and places to install what it is that you want. She provided chalk and the reception was outstanding.

Each time the wall is full it is gently washed and begun anew.

I found this project interesting not only because of what is already written by participants but just how hard I would have to think if given this opportunity.

Of course, we are all given this opportunity every day. Just what is it that you want to do before you die?

I found the answers quite compelling. Many of them centered around one talent or another. I want to dance, I want to sing, I want to have fun. Others.....well, we always have the I want world Peace legions. That's well and good but hardly attainible in the political climate we have.

Are there just too many things we want to do before we die? I think this may be the case. I would need to visit the wall several times before I felt I had written it all down.

Paramount among the things I want to do before I die is to move away from the Eastern Shore. But once I've accomplished that....I want to be healthy. I want to be able to walk fast. A geographical move may help in some small way ......oh, lets say climate change will lessen the aches and pains.

But then again....I'd like to have some fun before I die as well. You know...the spontaneous kind. Planned fun isn't what I'm talking about...like a vacation...."you will enjoy yourself". Stuff that comes from others and yourself because you feel joy.

I'd like to see my grandson graduate into the life he has planned for himself. As of this moment....it is pro football with a law degree to see him thru the off years. Sounds nice ,sounds balanced...perhaps my daughter had some influence there. Hmmmm but knowing Patrick he didn't need much help in deciding his future.

I f you were to come upon this wall in New Orleans....what would you write? Actually, I'm still thinking. Be careful out there....it can be slippery. rd.

I Have Become a Cry Lord.

2011-03-25T04:39:00.000+11:30

Good grief....what does that mean? I have shed my bullet proof heart vest? I have twisted and turned my life into a zwizzle stick and become more human? Or....I'm depressed.

I have come to the conclusion that I'm depressed. I get emails daily....asking the question...Could you be depressed? I used to read them to prove that they must be wrong. I wouldn't succumb to that....no not me that used to find humor in just about everything. It kept me at my computer signing off on one blog or another on just how funny life really was.

Now....I look at my own home page on facebook and weep openly on subjects that a dear to me. What's this all about? I watch a television commercial and tear up. I cry when things are sad, or I'm glad, or when someone says something nice, or not.

What did I do in the past? It just used to roll off my back and went on with my day. Oh sure, I gave it some thought but I didn't become emotional. I fixed it if I could, or went on to the next thing. Finis....end of thought process.

What happened to my smile? It's gone. I often wonder when I see something on the boob tube and the announcer is smiling up a storm and just can't imagine how that is done. Do they give smile lessons? I must look to others like a cranky old person.

Yup, when I used to visit my parents in Sun City.Arizona I would often mention that I was curious why most of the people there looked grumpy. Did they know they appeared this unfriendly? Now I do and haven't a clue as to what it is that is making me this way.

I sure have enough reasons....like the rest of the world, but they manage to put on a happy face and get over it. No one would know that they are suffering from illness, poverty, hunger. That is not to say we should band together and have a smile-in.

The news in Japan has been more than unsettling. These people appear so brave and stoic that I can't imagine myself in their shoes. Or have they given up....accepting the inevitable, dealing what life has tossed their way? Of course we identify with their misery more than the usual natural disaster....why because they are an enlightened society, they seemed to have it all. Technology, education, wealth were the hallmarks of Japan...now they must rebuild to achieve that standard again.

Now I must rebuild....to achieve some semblance of balance. That is the key word...balance. Yes, you cry , when things call for tears....but not at television commercials. I should be able to view my home page without weeping for all the wrongs in this world, but how to help alleviate them in some small measure.

It is a solitary task in front of me. Finding balance is never easy, not in a painting, recipe, or life. I need a little time to reach this goal....perhaps I will smile again in the very near future. .

I"m going to make lemonade....share my experiences and become who or what I was with additions like kindness, and caring.

Take care my friends....you never know what lurks behind that bush.rd

On the Shore

2011-03-05T12:48:00.000+11:30

1. Shot a dog with my pellet gun and...................

Was working midnight shift this week. Got to bed around 8 A.M. About 9:30 A.M. I was woken by the sound of my Chickens freaking out and a barking dog. Went to the back door saw the Chickens milling about in a pile on the yonder side of the run and saw an unknown dog shoot past from direction of the chicken run. Went back inside and rather than grab a 30.06 M1 Garand, shotgun, or .22 rifle I grabbed my pellet rifle. I'd rather not kill any animals. As I walked out back I spotted the dog in my neighbors yard come out from behind her shed. I cranked off a shot from about 100 feet. Didn't know if I hit it or not. I then saw a couple of other dogs run out. Just then I saw the fellow who lives behind me walking in the woods shout to the dogs. I yelled to him to get them out of the area. He yelled back that they were hunting rabbits. I went back into the house to try to get back to sleep.

Before I could get back to sleep a State Trooper came by the take a report. He said that the neighbor was at the vet with his dog. I gave him the report.

About a couple of hours later my supervisor,(I'm a Deputy Sheriff), called and told me that the dog had been euthanized.

The Trooper says he will be talking to the Commonwealth Attorney about bringing charges against me. Looks like a Class 6 Felony of Animal Cruelty.

Just being charged will mean the loss of my job. What a drag.

And I'm really bummed out about the poor dog on top of everything else.

Normally I don't write about animal stuff on this site. But my point isn't about the dog...surprised? Its about a deputy shooting off his weapon in such close proximity to homes and people.

From this article and the one that is similar in our twice weekly rag it sounds to me that this was a populated area, maybe dense, I don't know. I do know I have no neighbors within shouting distance, nor do I haul out my weapons when I see a dog.

The matter that just ruffles my feathers is the constant gripe I have with these neophytes shlepping their dogs on hunts. To further annoy me....when hunting season is over....like now...they just abandon them.

They run wild across the fields in packs, hungry, angry and dangerous. I know, I've met up with a couple of them while walking my dogs. Not a pretty sight. Me running...or being dragged behind my three dogs to flee the mob.

This is a problem that remains undefined. Oh sure, it comes up in front of the legislature every now and again, but the hunters reign supreme in Virginia. So nothing gets done....go home with what you came with, don't let them run wild and chase livestock and poultry, and for goodness sake round em up before you leave.

My property is surrounded by about 50 ac of woods and streams and of course agricultural land. The owner, whom I detest for other reasons, rents it out to hunters. Ok, this is an option for him, but I really,really get my undies in a bunch when a stray bullet whacks my house. No argument there I hope. The south side of my house is riddled with holes. Since it is vinyl sided it is never a clean hole, but a large cracked like affair that is never easy to repair. We've tried over the years...now we leave em.

You think its the holes that bug me? Sure...but we are in the structure that is being used as target practice. We've mentioned this to our local police....uh hum..the reply....do not disturb the hunter....a missed shot could cost us a fine! This is the way of rural Virginia and no 'come here' is going to change that.

No hunting after dusk....really? Tell that to the avid neophytes. Hunting is next to super bowl here....party time..We are left with the remains of these campouts. One year...as an example...the abandoned dogs drug a deer carcass onto my front yard flowerbeds. That's nature...you say I beg you to attempt to fetch your mail walking past this meal. No way.

So what is a person to do. After all hunting season doesn't last all year. (it can here if you plead hardship). I pity the dogs left behind, I pity the deer that get shot, and I pity the hunter who has nothing better to do than make a fool out of himself.

Be careful out there...you never know what is behind that bush. RD

The Cat is Out of The Bag

2011-02-19T10:15:00.000+11:30

Here it is, ladies and gentlemen..the list of my many blogs of the past five years. Having thoughts of dementia, brain tumor, etc. Muscle Cramps

Muscle Fatigue and Weakness

Irregular Heartbeat

Fatigue

Mental Confusion

Irritability

Abnormally Dry Skin

Insatiable Thirst

Chills

Depression

Nausea and Vomiting

Nervousness

Insomnia

Diarrhea

Low Blood Pressure

Periodic Headaches

Salt Retention

Constipation

High Cholesterol Levels

Glucose Intolerance

Impaired Growth

Edema

Extreme cases, cardiac arrest
And last but not least vertigo!

Ok, ok I was in hospital again. I was released Valentine's Day. My stay amounted to three days of endless tests and thankfully bedrest. This doc was very determined to find out what was amiss. I thought just another bunch of tests that proved to be nothing there. A waste of time and gobs of money. But I must admit I was getting very tired of hearing it was all in my head, or worse.

While there....in Nasawadox, no less, I flourished with the pints and pints of magnesium and potassium. I apparently had a severe deficiency. Hmmmm, you would think five years of giving blood for tests that proved nothing that this would have been a no-brainer. Also a waste of time and more gobs of money.
The red flag was the vertigo.

I was just medicated for vertigo but never diagnosed as to why I was on this stuff...In my head I suppose.

The last straw came about two weeks ago....constant asthma ( I usually don't have this) . I have a little cocktail that fits the bill so this is almost an aside disorder. But.....when I called in one of the scripts for renewal...the back office decided I no longer needed this. No refills. What? Walmart also made a call or two asking the back office to refill....always getting an answer that had nothing to do with refills.

Finding a new physicians office here is like seeking the golden grail....no new patients, or their speciality was something very precise. None of which I qualified for. Family physicians are like hens teeth....you've heard of them but can't find them.

I needed an ambulance to get me there in time. The ride is very long and I didn't think it was a good idea to try. I had the benefit of oxygen, duo meds and professionals at my side.

The asthma was treated very quickly, it always is for me. But there were underlying discrepancies. Thank goodness for this ER doc...no stone was left unturned. "Why do you take this? Why that?" Led him to believe I was being medicated to death.

Three days later I had scripts in my hot hands, a vague idea of what was amiss and instructions that were simple to follow.

Was this a Godsend or what? I'm over my anger regarding my previous doc....serves no purpose. Got a snappy referral for a Family Physician , whose back office does not prescribe.

I am happy to be able to share this for the purpose of be careful what you get. I thought I had my health issues covered, I was aware of my condition and looked up most everything on the net. But, as in all avenues of life....garbage in...garbage out. I can rest easier now....no need to have these deep black thoughts. I don't have what I thought I did and what I do have is treatable and not worthy of another health related blog. (clapping in the background)

No doubt...I'm achy breaky now but not for long. Take care, be aware! RD

Chicken Soup from Scratch

2011-02-08T13:01:00.000+11:30

There are times when you just crave something, you must have it and no amount of time spent making it is wasted. Or you know in your heart that this is just the best thing you can do for your family at the moment and they too must wait.

Canned or powered soups just don't cut it when prescribing for a cold, scratchy throat, runny eyes, feverish you know what I'm saying. You or someone you love feels miserable...what else but chicken soup.

Lately I've been doing quite a bit of remembering...like remembering my mother's chicken soup, or my aunt's excellent oatmeal..Oatmeal? I don't know what she did but it was wonderful. We had a discussion the other evening and it centered around eggs. Did you know that graduation from a culinary school requires three perfect egg dishes?

I finally fessed up, no, Bob I don't love your scrambled eggs, and Nicci I don't like yours either , too dry. I only like my mother's scrambled eggs. I have never been able to duplicate them, but I keep trying. Back to soup. I didn't like my mother's chicken soup either, she would always sneek cauliflower into the pot and that was a no no.

I did have a fave recipe, and I've misplaced it. after looking high and low I thought what the heck, be daring and try another. I settled on Ina Garten's Chicken Soup. It appears to be the closest to the one I lost. Here it is.

Ingredients

3 (5-pound) roasting chickens

3 large yellow onions, unpeeled and quartered

6 carrots, unpeeled and halved

4 stalks celery with leaves, cut into thirds

4 parsnips, unpeeled and cut in half (optional)

20 sprigs fresh parsley

15 sprigs fresh thyme

20 sprigs fresh dill

1 head garlic, unpeeled and cut in half crosswise

2 tablespoons kosher salt

2 teaspoons whole black peppercorns

To serve:

nocoupons

4 cups 1/4-inch-diced carrots

4 cups 1/4-inch-diced celery

1/4 cup minced fresh dill

1/4 cup minced fresh parsley

Matzo Balls, (see recipe)

Directions

Place the chickens, onions, carrots, celery, parsnips, parsley, thyme, dill, garlic, and seasonings in a 16- to 20-quart stockpot. Add 7 quarts of water and bring to a boil. Simmer, uncovered, for 1 hour. Remove 2 of the chickens and allow to cool slightly. Remove the breast meat from both chickens and set aside. Return the remaining chicken and carcasses to the pot and continue simmering, uncovered, for 3 more hours. Strain the entire contents of the pot through a colander and chill. Remove the surface fat, then reheat the stock as follows, or pack in containers and freeze.

To serve the soup, return the stock to the pot and reheat, adding the diced carrots, celery, dill, and parsley. Shred the reserved chicken breast meat into large pieces and add to the stock. Simmer over low heat for 5 minutes to cook the vegetables and reheat the chicken. Season, to taste, and serve as is, or ladle each serving over 2 warm Matzo Balls.

Tomorrow I will begin to make the stock. That too is from Ina Garten. This is a two day affair so I do hope my chilled family will be ready for it. Oh, I know they will wait.

Since there are literally hundreds of chicken soup recipes I thought you might like to add your special ingredients to this recipe. If I'm not mistaken there isn't a mention of nutmeg in this one...I always like that taste too.

Until then. Keep well. RD

Oh NO, Spring is Rapidly Approachng

2011-01-31T08:49:00.000+11:30

Oh, no, Spring is rapidly approaching.

.by Margaret North on Sunday, 30 January 2011 at 16:00.That is by no stretch my imagination. It is coming and I'm not ready. Ready to plant? Ready to peruse the gardening catalogs and order? Nope, none of the above. IT IS CLASS REUNION TIME!

Anyone that knows me, or of me or has made some wild guesses about me knows I don't like these kinds of occasions. I have been under a rock low these many years and my school search engin has not been able to find me. That was perfectly fine with me.

Until this winter....I received a card from miles away from an old aquaintance reminding me that our reunion would be this April. And went on and on just how much fun it will be to see all of us again....do we think we could still fit into our uniforms? I'm sorry Mary Jane I tossed that long, long ago. I do not wax nostalgic for the dull gray and blue outfits that were mandatory untill graduation. Along with the sadle shoes.

Why is it that I havn't given these people a second thought for more than a decade?I went my way....out West. Wide open spaces and fewer rules to break. My memories are really foggy, and names generally escape me. I just got a death notice from a classmate whom I had no clue who she was.

I would much rather remember what little I can and leave it at that. The search engin must have been working overtime to catch me so unawares. But now that they have found me I seem to be getting some little tid bit of un newsworthy mentiones on a monthly basis. Who is that? Did I know them? Probably not.

I was just as reclusive then as I am now. I hung with the boarders and generally ignored the day students...and that is how it was, no quirk of mine. I thought about it for a second or two and discovered....I would not regognize any of my classmates if we were to bump into one another on a street.

Isn't that awful? Not really....at the time I did have certain friends and hung mainly with them for years. But I havn't received a Christmas card from them either....they as well as I may as well fallen off the face of the earth.

Oddly enough, I remember the instructors. I remember being chased down a hallway by a bat in the attic....after curfew. I remember the horrid lamb dinners on Sunday's, I only ate the mint jelly. But weekends were special when we had fried apples....what a treat. One of the house mothers had a rather severe drinking problem....I relied on that to do my nightly rounds of visitations. The next year... my housemother was so old I could antagonize her just by being able to walk faster than she.

Sure I remember these and other things...after all I'm not brain dead yet. But are these few and far between memories enough to get all worked up over? And go to mandatory teas, sherries, walking tours and a gala dinner?? Nope I think not.

I will take a pass on this event....which in all reality may be my last chance to participate in something quite like this. I want to remember things as I thought they were. I do not want to revisit my past, not now not ever. A shame really but that's me....usually taking the low road and remaining invisible. I know my dad wouldn't approve of my decision but I know he would have given me an alternative event to this one with one of his own....I know for a fact that as long as it didn't involve a dentist I would grab at his suggestion.

See you in the here and now. RD I dare you to display your high school picture as your avatar....I will.

.

Three things can't be hidden: coughing, poverty, and love." - Yiddish proverb

2011-01-27T13:51:00.000+11:30

This proverb struck me as being right on the money. You simply can't hide this stuff. I've been coughing here in Virginia for twelve years.

Like clockwork ... come October and it starts, and doesn't abate until May. I've been prescribed all types of meds and until NOW haven't had any positive lasting results. No, I have no clue what causes this but I do have some rather obvious guesses.... mold being one.

Poverty is difficult but not impossible to hide. You can smile, dress in several seasons ago clothes and look like everything is hunkey dorrie. That gets old fast. It is a battle every day to maintain some kind of normalcy. I have reached my limit of being funny, thoughtful, and generally being nice. It can be done but the anger is just beneath the surface and just jumps out at very inopportune times.

Forget for a moment you cannot cook as you once used to. That a trip to the store has become a hate filled experience. Sure, I read all I can lay my hands on for more budget friendly recipes. I shop the perimeter of stores where the good for you food is available. I've even joined some groups and web sites of "good and cheap". It too can be done, but there are times when something sweet, unhealthy and wildly extravagant gnaws at your psyche and you cannot get it out of your mind.

Love.....hmmmm, really difficult to do. I cannot help but think that things could be hugely different had Robert listened to me twelve years ago. This was a no brainer....this is a poverty pocket and from what I've heard and read always was one. Six months into this move I saw the handwriting on the walls, sidewalks, people's faces....whew, not for me.

I always adhered to the fact that you must not blame....that is past behavior, instead look for the solutions. I think I found several that were doable including a move to Panama which was desperation calling. But Robert cannot, could not be budged. He was going to conquer the Eastern Shore. That made him unlovable to me.

Stubbornness is not attractive, it wears on you , in fact you dream about solutions, finally you stop....in your tracks.....and give up. Forget the perimeter shopping, forget the plans you had like a consignment shop, the chronicling of events and submitting them to the local paper and then....creativity goes down the drain like everything else. You wonder to yourself just what did I have in mind for that desk or chest of drawers. It doesn't move, it taunts you day in and day out...."paint me" "do something". Then it dawns on you....'oh, I was supposed to buy several more colors of paint' then the project could be completed...nope, can't do, gotta feed the cats and dogs.

My daughter had a solution....she is the all time wunderkind of peanut butter pie. I can't recall just how many she baked or simply gave away to give the citizens of the Eastern Shore a taste of delicious tasting heaven. Well, that too, went by the wayside....who can afford the gourmet ingredients when there are meat and potatoes to eek out of little or no money.

I'm wondering what will become of us. Yes, I'm bitching I just can't think straight anymore. The likelihood of the sheriff coming to the door and posting an auction sign is not out of the realm of possibilities. Do I think that this problem is unique to us.....no way....you read about folks just like us every day. What do they do? I have no idea. I know that they try to make things right, they get one or more jobs, perhaps they approach social services. Again....don't forget this is a poverty pocket...what services are available are slim to none,,I've checked it out.

What is the next step? RD

Not Out Of The Woods

2011-01-06T14:08:00.000+11:30

Today, January 5, 2011 at approximately 1:30 p.m. I witnessed my daughter have a stroke. She was quietly attempting to activate Robert's new phone.

I was especially watching her because she had been feeling "strange". She was released from the hospital the day before. At that admittance she was suffering from complications of asthma and flu - like symptoms. She was by no means ready to be released. She became ill yesterday, vomiting and complaining of her five year headache.

She began to lean to her right, not able to speak, flailing her arms telling me....I don't need help. I didn't listen. Within five minutes a rescue squad arrived. Same that took her to the hospital the other day. They were so professional, and quick to aid her.

Robert spent the remainder of the day in the hospital waiting room. When Nikki arrived the neurologist and ER doc were waiting and ready to take over.

At long last she got her MRI and dozens of blood tests and x-rays. Why the anxiety over the MRI? She and I have been asking her primary for years to do one. She needed to find out once and for all what was causing this headache, That is not to say we know now....but it needed this? to get some answers?

Low and behold.....by 7p.m she called me from her intensive care room. She did slur her words a bit but she felt fine otherwise. She improved as the evening went on.

Her last visit from her Doc....he jumped up and down that she responded so well to their aggressive measures upon entering the ER. I guess I'm jumping up and down myself...a little cautiously however. I've been on the phone constantly with her sister who happenchance is temporarily living with her inlaws.

Her mother-in-law is a veritible encyclopedia of health issues. She has survived 6 heart attacks and I don't know how many strokes. So talking with her made it easier for me to comprehend what was happening. In fact Elaine spoke with Nikki at the hospital and quizzed her as she was quizzed after her stroke. She feels that Nikki is doing fine but to be cautious.

That is all I know for today. I needed to vent this with you and hope that tomorrow will bring some sunshine. Keep yourselves safe...RD

New Year Soup Recipe

2011-01-02T14:41:00.000+11:30

New Year Noodle SoupIf you don't have beans that have already been cooked you can use canned ones. Or you can soak the garbanzo & borlotti overnight, and add them after the broth comes to a boil. Cook for 15 minutes, then stir in the yellow split peas/lentils. This way the beans/lentils should be done cooking around the same time. The original recipe calls for fresh borlotti beans, which aren't in season. I used dried borlotti that I cooked a couple weeks back, then froze until now. And, on the noodle front, I couldn't help but add more than what the original recipe called for. You can actually use more/less noodles - even when it seemed like too much, they always manage to get slurped up in a soup like this.

2 tablespoons olive oil

1 onion, thinly sliced

1 long red chili OR green serrano, finely chopped

1/2 teaspoon ground turmeric

1 teaspoon ground cumin

1/4 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper

8 1/2 cups / 2 liters good-tasting vegetable stock/broth

100g / 3.5 oz yellow split peas or brown lentils

1 1/2 cups cooked chickpeas, rinsed if using canned

2 cups / 350g cooked borlotti beans

fine grain sea salt

120 g thin egg noodles, fresh or dried

3 1/2 oz / 100g fresh spinach leaves, finely shredded

1/2 cup finely shredded cilantro leaves

2 tablespoons chopped fresh dill

juice of one lime

Toppings:

1 tablespoon olive oil

1 tablespoon unsalted butter

1 large onion, thinly sliced

100 ml sour cream or creme fraiche

50g / scant 2 ounces of toasted, chopped walnuts

Heat the oil in a large, thick-bottomed soup pot over medium heat. Add the onion and the chile and cook until they soften, a few minutes. Add the spices and cook for another thirty seconds, just long enough for them to toast a bit, then stir in the stock. Bring to a boil and add the split peas/lentils to the pot. Cook until they are just tender, about 25 minutes. Stir in the cooked chickpeas and borlotti beans. Once the beans have heated throughout, season with salt to taste.

In the meantime, you can prepare the toppings. Heat the olive oil and butter in a large frying pan over medium heat along with a couple big pinches of salt. Cook the onion, stirring occasionally, until golden and caramelized, 8 - 10+ minutes. Set aside.

Just before you're ready to eat, add the noodles to the simmering soup and cook until al dente. Stir in the spinach, and cilantro and dill. Add a big squeeze of lime to the pot or serve wedges along with each bowl of soup. Taste and adjust the seasoning to your liking.

Serve right away, each bowl topped with a big spoonful of caramelized onions, some creme fraiche, and a sprinkling of walnuts.

Serves about 4.

Adapted slightly from the Ash-e Reshteh / New Year Noodle Soup recipe in Saraban, by Greg & Lucy Malouf

Prep time: 20 min - Cook time: 40 min

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Related EntryHealthy One Pan Recipes

My favorite healthy, one-pan recipes. The type of things that you can pull together any night of the week without too much fuss or fanfare. I love big-flavored, colorful stir-fries, and hearty chunky soups, so I included a lot of those types of recipes on the list.

I didn't want to start the new year out by copy and paste, but that particular wish was not written in stone and I was so intrigued with this recipe I needed to spread the good news around.

We are all sick on the Wits End Ranch. In fact my daughter is in hospital right now with severe asthma and some kind of infection. I stayed up all nite doing breathing treatments just to stay out of the ER on New Years Eve. and Bob is sneezing and coughing to beat the band. So what is better than a comfort soup?

I'm a bit over chicken noodle, the first go at it during the early winter months its a treat, but then I get to thinking "what is that dead chicken smell?"

Perhaps tomorrow I will give you the scoop on the new blog name. No big secret just don't have the time at this late hour.

I wish you all a healthy week ahead, and I will be trying out this soup recipe. Take care. RD

How to bathe a cat.

2010-11-13T06:44:00.002+11:30

How to bathe a Cat
Author unknown

Some people say cats never have to be bathed. They say cats lick themselves clean. They say cats have a special enzyme of some sort in their saliva that works like new, improved Wisk - dislodging the dirt where it hides and whisking it away.

I've spent most of my life believing this folklore. Like most blind believers, I've been able to discount all the facts to the contrary, the kitty odors that lurk in the corners of the garage and dirt smudges that cling to the throw rug by the fireplace.

The time comes, however, when a man must face reality: when he must look squarely in the face of massive public sentiment to the contrary and announce: "This cat smells like a port-a-potty on a hot day in Juarez."

When that day arrives at your house, as it has in mine, I have some advice you might consider as you place your feline friend under your arm and head for the bathtub:

•Know that although the cat has the advantage of quickness and lack of concern for human life, you have the advantage of strength. Capitalize on that advantage by selecting the battlefield. Don't try to bathe him in an open area where he can force you to chase him.

Pick a very small bathroom. If your bathroom is more than four feet square, I recommend that you get in the tub with the cat and close the sliding-glass doors as if you were about to take a shower. (A simple shower curtain will not do. A berserk cat can shred a three-ply rubber shower curtain quicker than a politician can shift positions.)

•Know that a cat has claws and will not hesitate to remove all the skin from your body. Your advantage here is that you are smart and know how to dress to protect yourself. I recommend canvas overalls tucked into high-top construction boots, a pair of steel-mesh gloves, an army helmet, a hockey face mask, and a long-sleeved flak jacket.

•Prepare everything in advance. There is no time to go out for a towel when you have a cat digging a hole in your flak jacket. Draw the water. Make sure the bottle of kitty shampoo is inside the glass enclosure. Make sure the towel can be reached, even if you are lying on your back in the water.

•Use the element of surprise. Pick up your cat nonchalantly, as if to simply carry him to his supper dish. (Cats will not usually notice your strange attire. They have little or no interest in fashion as a rule. If he does notice your garb, calmly explain that you are taking part in a product testing experiment for J.C. Penney.)

•Once you are inside the bathroom, speed is essential to survival. In a single liquid motion, shut the bathroom door, step into the tub enclosure, slide the glass door shut, dip the cat in the water and squirt him with shampoo. You have begun one of the wildest 45 seconds of your life.

Cats have no handles. Add the fact that he now has soapy fur, and the problem is radically compounded. Do not expect to hold on to him for more than two or three seconds at a time. When you have him, however, you must remember to give him another squirt of shampoo and rub like crazy. He'll then spring free and fall back into the water, thereby rinsing himself off. (The national record for cats is three latherings, so don't expect too much.)

•Next, the cat must be dried. Novice cat bathers always assume this part will be the most difficult, for humans generally are worn out at this point and the cat is just getting really determined. In fact, the drying is simple compared to what you have just been through. That's because by now the cat is semipermanently affixed to your right leg. You simply pop the drain plug with you foot, reach for your towel and wait. (Occasionally, however, the cat will end up clinging to the top of your army helmet. If this happens, the best thing you can do is to shake him loose and to encourage him toward your leg.) After all the water is drained from the tub, it is a simple matter to just reach down and dry the cat.

In a few days the cat will relax enough to be removed from your leg. He will usually have nothing to say for about three weeks and will spend a lot of time sitting with his back to you. He might even become psychoceramic and develop the fixed stare of a plaster figurine.

You will be tempted to assume he is angry. This isn't usually the case. As a rule he is simply plotting ways to get through your defenses and injure you for life the next time you decide to give him a bath.

But at least now he smells a lot better.

I must try to remember this for future reference. Since our recent outbreak of pesky fleas....I shuddered at the thought of dipping the kitties. I forsaw all the wounds in vivid color. Felt the pain the little claws produced. And the blood.

Thankfully, I have the problem under control. ...without the dipping I might add.

Never say never....well I hope to never see another flea. Each time a cat or dog reaches into some kind of pretzel position to scratch an itch I will tell myself....its just an itch. Stay well. RD

Remembering Our Veterans

2010-11-10T06:15:00.001+11:30

Veterans Day History & Remembering our Veterans
Posted by Carisa Gaul on November 8th, 2010

When is Veterans Day? Veterans Day is observed on November 11 regardless what day of the week it falls on. It’s a day to celebrate and honor America’s military veterans for their patriotism, love of our country, and willingness to serve / sacrifice for the common good. Not to be confused with Memorial Day which is celebrated the fourth Monday every May and honors American servicemembers who died or suffer from injuries from being in service.

November 11 is also celebrated as Armistice Day or Remembrance Day in other parts of the world. It’s the anniversary of the signing of the Armistice which ended World War I or the Great War. World War I cessation of hostilities formally ended on the 11th hour of the 11th day in the 11th month 1918 with Allied nations and Germany signing the Armistice.
President Woodrow Wilson proclaimed Veteran’s Day a holiday on November 11, 1919.

Woodrow Wilson said: “To us in America, the reflections of Armistice Day will be filled with lots of pride in the heroism of those who died in the country’s service and with gratitude for the victory, both because of the thing from which it has freed us and because of the opportunity it has given America to show her sympathy with peace and justice in the councils of the nations.”

In 1926 the United States Congress requested President Calvin Coolidge to issue another proclamation to observe each year on November 11th a legal federal holiday. The proclamation for Veterans Day was approved May 1938 to honor all those who participated in the War: “a day to be dedicated to the cause of world peace and to be thereafter celebrated and known as ‘Armistice Day’.”

In June 1954 congress amended the proclamation to replace “Armistice” with “Veterans” and since it’s been known as Veterans Day.

Red poppies are given out by uniformed war veterans on Veterans day. There are veterans day parades all over the country with a wreath-laying ceremony at the Tomb of the Unknown Soldiers in Arlington National Cemetery in Washington.

Applebee’s will be celebrating Veterans Day by serving more than 1 million free meals to active-duty personnel from 11 a.m. until midnight on Veterans’ Day.
The menu will include:
7-ounce House Sirloin, Bacon Cheeseburger, Three Cheese Chicken Penne, Chicken Tenders Platter, Oriental Chicken Salad, Fiesta Lime Chicken and Double Crunch Shrimp.

To be eligible for your free meal you must be in uniform or provide proof of military service such as:

- An active-duty or retiree ID card.

- A current leave and earnings statement.

- A DD214 discharge certificate.

- A photo in uniform.

- A veterans organization card, such as an American Legion or Veterans of Foreign Wars card.

The Animal Cruelty Syndrom

2010-06-14T10:41:00.000+11:30

The Animal-Cruelty Syndrome
By CHARLES SIEBERT
On a late May afternoon last year in southwest Baltimore, a 2-year-old female pit bull terrier was doused in gasoline and set alight. A young city policewoman on her regular patrol of the neighborhood of boarded-up row houses and redbrick housing developments turned her squad car onto the 1600 block of Presbury Street and saw a cloud of black smoke rising from the burning dog. She hopped out, ran past idle onlookers and managed to put out the flames with her sweater. The dog, subsequently named Phoenix, survived for four days with burns over 95 percent of her body, but soon began to succumb to kidney failure and had to be euthanized.

It was only a matter of hours before the story, made vivid by harrowing video footage of the wounded dog, was disseminated nationwide in newspapers, TV and radio newscasts and countless Web sites. An initial $1,000 reward for the capture of the culprits would soon climb to $26,000 as people around the country followed Phoenix’s struggle for life. A gathering of people in Venice Beach, Calif., held a candlelight vigil for her. A month later, the mayor of Baltimore, Sheila Dixon, announced the creation of the Anti-Animal-Abuse Task Force to work in concert with city officials, local law enforcement and animal rights and animal-control groups to find ways to better prevent, investigate and prosecute such crimes.

The scale, speed and intensity of the response were striking. The subject of animal abuse, especially the abuse of pit bulls in dog-fighting activities, has achieved a higher profile after the 2007 arrest of the N.F.L. star Michael Vick for operating an illegal interstate dog-fighting operation in Surry County, Va. But the beleaguered pit bull is merely the most publicized victim of a phenomenon that a growing number of professionals — including police officers, prosecutors, psychologists, social workers, animal-control officers, veterinarians and dogcatchers — are now addressing with a newfound vigor: wanton cruelty toward animals. Before 1990, only six states had felony provisions in their animal-cruelty laws; now 46 do. Two years ago, the American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals formed the nation’s first Mobile Animal Crime Scene Investigation Unit, a rolling veterinary hospital and forensic lab that travels around the country helping traditional law-enforcement agencies follow the evidentiary trails of wounded or dead animals back to their abusers.

In addition to a growing sensitivity to the rights of animals, another significant reason for the increased attention to animal cruelty is a mounting body of evidence about the link between such acts and serious crimes of more narrowly human concern, including illegal firearms possession, drug trafficking, gambling, spousal and child abuse, rape and homicide. In the world of law enforcement — and in the larger world that our laws were designed to shape — animal-cruelty issues were long considered a peripheral concern and the province of local A.S.P.C.A. and Humane Society organizations; offenses as removed and distinct from the work of enforcing the human penal code as we humans have deemed ourselves to be from animals. But that illusory distinction is rapidly fading.

“With traditional law enforcement,” Sgt. David Hunt, a dog-fighting expert with the Franklin County Sheriff’s Office in Columbus, Ohio, told me, “the attitude has been that we have enough stuff on our plate, let the others worry about Fluffy and Muffy. But I’m starting to see a shift in that mentality now.” Hunt has traveled to 24 states around the country in order to teach law-enforcement personnel about the dog-fighting underworld, often stressing the link between activities like dog fighting and domestic violence. “You have to sell it to them in such a way that it’s not a Fluffy-Muffy issue,” he said of teaching police officers about animal-abuse issues. “It’s part of a larger nexus of crimes and the psyche behind them.”

The connection between animal abuse and other criminal behaviors was recognized, of course, long before the evolution of the social sciences and institutions with which we now address such behaviors. In his famous series of 1751 engravings, “The Four Stages of Cruelty,” William Hogarth traced the life path of the fictional Tom Nero: Stage 1 depicts Tom as a boy, torturing a dog; Stage 4 shows Tom’s body, fresh from the gallows where he was hanged for murder, being dissected in an anatomical theater. And animal cruelty has long been recognized as a signature pathology of the most serious violent offenders. As a boy, Jeffrey Dahmer impaled the heads of cats and dogs on sticks; Theodore Bundy, implicated in the murders of some three dozen people, told of watching his grandfather torture animals; David Berkowitz, the “Son of Sam,” poisoned his mother’s parakeet.

But the intuitions that informed the narrative arc of Tom Nero are now being borne out by empirical research. A paper published in a psychiatry journal in 2004, “A Study of Firesetting and Animal Cruelty in Children: Family Influences and Adolescent Outcomes,” found that over a 10-year period, 6-to-12-year-old children who were described as being cruel to animals were more than twice as likely as other children in the study to be reported to juvenile authorities for a violent offense. In an October 2005 paper published in Journal of Community Health, a team of researchers conducting a study over seven years in 11 metropolitan areas determined that pet abuse was one of five factors that predicted who would begin other abusive behaviors. In a 1995 study, nearly a third of pet-owning victims of domestic abuse, meanwhile, reported that one or more of their children had killed or harmed a pet.

The link between animal abuse and interpersonal violence is becoming so well established that many U.S. communities now cross-train social-service and animal-control agencies in how to recognize signs of animal abuse as possible indicators of other abusive behaviors. In Illinois and several other states, new laws mandate that veterinarians notify the police if their suspicions are aroused by the condition of the animals they treat. The state of California recently added Humane Society and animal-control officers to the list of professionals bound by law to report suspected child abuse and is now considering a bill in the State Legislature that would list animal abusers on the same type of online registry as sex offenders and arsonists.

When I spoke recently with Stacy Wolf, vice president and chief legal counsel of the A.S.P.C.A.’s Humane Law Enforcement department, which focuses on the criminal investigation of animal-cruelty cases in New York City, she drew a comparison between the emerging mindfulness about animal cruelty and the changing attitudes toward domestic abuse in the 1980s. “It really has only been in recent years that there’s been more free and accurate reporting with respect to animal cruelty, just like 30 years ago domestic violence was not something that was commonly reported,” she said. “Clearly every act of violence committed against an animal is not a sign that somebody is going to hurt a person. But when there’s a pattern of abusive behavior in a family scenario, then everyone from animal-control to family advocates to the court system needs to consider all vulnerable victims, including animals, and understand that violence is violence.”

It isn’t clear whether Phoenix was used for dog fighting. Subsequent examinations of her body did find — along with evidence that gasoline had been poured down her throat — a number of bite wounds. Veterinarians, however, said that those could have been self-inflicted in the course of Phoenix’s frenzied attempts to fight off the flames. But prosecutors also later claimed that Phoenix’s accused assailants, 17-year-old twin brothers named Tremayne and Travers Johnson, of a nearby block of Pulaski Street, were using a vacant neighborhood home for the keeping of pit bulls and other ganglike activities.

The Johnson twins have pleaded not guilty. According to court documents, both suspects, said to be members of the 1600 Boys gang, were identified by a witness as running out of the alley where the dog was set alight. “There was some gang-style graffiti found in that abandoned building,” Randall Lockwood, the A.S.P.C.A.’s senior vice president for forensic sciences and anticruelty projects, and a member of the new Anti-Animal-Abuse Task Force in Baltimore, told me at the A.S.P.C.A.’s Midtown Manhattan offices in December. “There was also dog feces on the premises. Unfortunately, nobody bothered collecting the feces to see if it was from Phoenix.”

Along with the need to track the physical evidence of animal cruelty there is the deeper and more complex challenge of trying to parse its underlying causes and ultimate ramifications. As a graduate student in psychology, Lockwood had an interest in human-animal interactions and the role of animals and education in the development of empathy in children. This inevitably led him to consider the flip side of the equation: the origins of cruelty to animals and what such behavior might indicate about an individual’s capacity for empathy and his or her possible future behavior.

Back in the early 1980s, Lockwood was asked to work on behalf of New Jersey’s Division of Youth and Family Services with a team of investigators looking into the treatment of animals in middle-class American households that had been identified as having issues of child abuse. They interviewed all the members of each family as well as the social workers who were assigned to them. The researchers’ expectation going in was that such families would have relatively few pets given their unstable and volatile environments. They found, however, not only that these families owned far more pets than other households in the same community but also that few of the animals were older than 2.

“There was a very high turnover of pets in these families,” Lockwood told me. “Pets dying or being discarded or running away. We discovered that in homes where there was domestic violence or physical abuse of children, the incidence of animal cruelty was close to 90 percent. The most common pattern was that the abusive parent had used animal cruelty as a way of controlling the behaviors of others in the home. I’ve spent a lot of time looking at what links things like animal cruelty and child abuse and domestic violence. And one of the things is the need for power and control. Animal abuse is basically a power-and-control crime.”

The dynamic of animal abuse in the context of domestic violence is a particularly insidious one. As a pet becomes an increasingly vital member of the family, the threat of violence to that pet becomes a strikingly powerful intimidating force for the abuser: an effective way for a petty potentate to keep the subjects of his perceived realm in his thrall. In 2005, Lockwood wrote a paper, “Cruelty Toward Cats: Changing Perspectives,” which underscores this dynamic of animal cruelty as a means to overcome powerlessness and gain control over others. Cats, Lockwood found, are more commonly victims of abuse than dogs because dogs are, by their very nature, more obedient and eager to please, whereas cats are nearly impossible to control. “You can get a dog to obey you even if you’re not particularly nice to it,” Lockwood told me. “With a cat you can be very nice, and it’s probably going to ignore you, and if you’re mean to it, it may retaliate.”

Whatever the particular intimidation tactics used, their effectiveness is indisputable. In an often-cited 1997 survey of 48 of the largest shelters in the United States for victims of domestic violence and child abuse, more than 85 percent of the shelters said that women who came in reported incidents of animal abuse; 63 percent of the shelters said that children who came in reported the same. In a separate study, a quarter of battered women reported that they had delayed leaving abusive relationships for the shelter out of fear for the well-being of the family pet. In response, a number of shelters across the country have developed “safe haven” programs that offer refuges for abused pets as well as people, in order that both can be freed from the cycle of intimidation and violence.

What cannot be so easily monitored or ameliorated, however, is the corrosive effect that witnessing such acts has on children and their development. More than 70 percent of U.S. households with young children have pets. In a study from the 1980s, 7-to-10-year-old children named on average two pets when listing the 10 most important individuals in their lives. When asked to “whom do you turn to when you are feeling sad, angry, happy or wanting to share a secret,” nearly half of 5-year-old children in another study mentioned their pets. One way to think of what animal abuse does to a child might simply be to consider all the positive associations and life lessons that come from a child’s closeness to a pet — right down to eventually receiving their first and perhaps most gentle experiences of death as a natural part of life — and then flipping them so that all those lessons and associations turn negative.

In a 2000 article for AV Magazine, a publication of the American Anti-Vivisection Society, titled, “Wounded Hearts: Animal Abuse and Child Abuse,” Lockwood recounts an interview he conducted for the New Jersey Division of Youth and Family Services in the early 1980s. He describes showing to “a perky 7-year-old boy” a simple drawing of a boy and a dog, playing ball inside a house and a broken lamp on the floor beside them. Lockwood asked the 7-year-old — a child who had witnessed his brother being beaten by their father, who was “reportedly responsible for the ‘disappearance’ of several family pets” — to describe what would happen next in the story of the boy in the picture. “He grew still and sullen,” Lockwood writes, “and shook his head slowly. ‘That’s it,’ he said in a matter-of-fact tone, ‘They’re all going to die.’ ”

Children who have witnessed such abuse or been victimized themselves frequently engage in what are known as “abuse reactive” behaviors, Lockwood said, re-enacting what has been done to them either with younger siblings or with pets. Such children are also often driven to suppress their own feelings of kindness and tenderness toward a pet because they can’t bear the pain caused by their own empathy for the abused animal. In an even further perversion of an individual’s healthy empathic development, children who witness the family pet being abused have been known to kill the pet themselves in order to at least have some control over what they see as the animal’s inevitable fate. Those caught in such a vicious abuse-reactive cycle will not only continue to expose the animals they love to suffering merely to prove that they themselves can no longer be hurt, but they are also given to testing the boundaries of their own desensitization through various acts of self-mutilation. In short, such children can only achieve a sense of safety and empowerment by inflicting pain and suffering on themselves and others.

In March I paid a visit to the newly established Veterinary Forensics Medicine Sciences program at the University of Florida, Gainesville. Directed by Melinda Merck, a veterinarian who serves as the A.S.P.C.A.’s senior director of veterinary forensics and as the “captain” of its new mobile C.S.I. unit, the program is the first of its kind at a major U.S. university. As animal abuse has become an increasingly recognized fixture in the context of other crimes and their prosecution, it is also starting to require the same kinds of sophisticated investigative techniques brought to bear on those other crimes.

Veterinary forensic students at the University of Florida are being trained in the same way that traditional crime-scene investigators are, taking courses in a wide range of topics: crime-scene processing; forensic entomology (determining the time of an animal’s injury or death by the types of insects around them); bloodstain-pattern and bite-mark analysis; buried-remains excavation; and forensic osteology (the study of bones and bone fragments).

“I love being around bones,” Merck proclaimed as she led me into the university’s C. A. Pound Human Identification Laboratory, a sprawling, brashly lighted array of human skeletal remains arranged in meticulous piecemeal patterns on rows of shiny metal tables. “I find bones fascinating. There is a lot of information in them.” Merck, who testifies at animal-cruelty trials across the country, conducted the forensic osteology on the dog remains recovered from the mass graves on Michael Vick’s Virginia property in 2007.

The lab is one of the busiest of its kind in the world, enlisted for countless crime-scene investigations and archaeological digs and to help identify the victims of disasters, including those of the 9/11 attacks on the World Trade Center and Hurricane Katrina. The fact that one of the examining tables and adjacent bone-boiling and cleansing units have now been assigned to Merck for her own animal-forensic work and course instruction speaks volumes about the shifting perspective toward animal-cruelty crimes. “We have a really cool thing going on here,” Merck told me. “We have the collaborative effort of a lot of big-wig forensic specialists down here with years of experience.”

She led me over to her examining table. Set at one end was what she called “my box of evidence,” a picnic-cooler-size plastic container that held the excavated remains from a mass grave, part of an investigation she is conducting into a suspected dog-fighting operation in Georgia. “In most of our cases of animal cruelty, the bodies are not fresh,” she said. “They’re decomposed. They’re discarded. They’re hidden. And so the advanced post-mortem stage is where we really need to be experts.”

Merck’s 2006 book, “Forensic Investigation of Animal Cruelty: A Guide for Veterinary and Law Enforcement Professionals,” which she wrote with Randall Lockwood and Leslie Sinclair of Shelter Veterinary Services in Columbia, Md., contains a daunting list of the grisly things human beings do to animals: thermal injuries (immolation, baking, microwaving); blunt-force trauma; sharp-force and projectile injuries; asphyxiation; drowning; poisoning; ritual murders; and sexual assault. Merck spared no details in discussing such horrors over the course of a veterinary-forensics lecture I attended earlier that day, held in a conference room at a hotel near the university as part of a four-day seminar. Even Merck’s seasoned audience of out-of-town vets, A.S.P.C.A. disaster-response and investigative-team workers, community-outreach personnel and the chief legal counsel for New York City’s Humane Law Enforcement department could be heard gasping into their coffee mugs as Merck annotated, one after the next, screen-projected slides of stark brutality: blood-drenched dog-fighting pits; bludgeoned, internally hemorrhaging pets; bruised and mutilated canine sexual organs; a heavily duct-taped, paint-coated puppy and the fur-lined, nail-scraped oven walls from which the puppy struggled vainly to escape.

Those whose compassion compels them to confront and combat daily its utter absence are, of necessity, often forced to affect a passionless pose. Merck proceeded through her seminar with clinical speed and precision through a series of signature forensic cases. One of the first pivoted around the mystery of a missing Pomeranian whose owners were convinced had been stolen from their backyard. Merck called up the slide of a tiny skeleton she had rendered in her corner of the lab from remains found in a vacant lot not far from the Pomeranian owners’ home. It looked like a wingless bat, the delicate brace of ribs bearing tiny symmetrical snaps on each side.

“What could have caused these,” Merck asked, pointing her red laser at the breaks. “What could make a dog disappear so fast?”

“Man!” someone called out to bursts of laughter.

“What else,” Merck said, smiling.

“A bird of prey!”

“Yep,” Merck nodded. “Most likely a hawk. These two breaks are where the bird’s talons grabbed hold of the dog. This is why forensic osteology is so important, and yet there’s nothing in our standard veterinary training that teaches us how to look at bones properly.”

Merck soon proceeded to the case of the puppy found four years ago in the oven of a ransacked community center in Atlanta. An outraged local prosecutor called Merck about the case and then showed up at her vet clinic one day with the dog’s remains. “She brings me the puppy, and this . . . ,” Merck said, the slide behind her now sapping the room’s air, “is what she brings me.”

Step by step, from the outer paint to the unraveled layers of duct tape to the dog’s abraded nails and paws to the hem of an old T-shirt that was used as a leash, Merck’s detailed forensic analysis of the victim and of the crime scene would be used to assemble a timeline of events. Ultimately, her analysis would help seal the conviction of two teenage brothers on multiple charges, including burglary, animal cruelty and — because the brothers had shown a number of children at the community center what they had done and then threatened them with their lives if they told anyone — additional charges of child abuse and terroristic threats.

The most common dynamic behind the cases cited that morning was that of a man abusing a family pet to gain control over, or exact revenge against, other family members. Merck told of one puppy found buried in the backyard of a house. As Merck tells it, the dog belonged to the female friend of a woman who had recently left the man with whom she and her two children from a previous marriage were living. She and her children had moved in with the friend, someone who the man decided was keeping him and his estranged partner from reuniting. The girlfriend’s pet, therefore, became for him the optimum vehicle for expressing his rage against both women.

“He tortured the puppy when the two women weren’t home,” Merck told me after her lecture that day. “He also tried to make two of the kids participate just to make it more heinous. So along with the animal cruelty, of course, we had child abuse.”

Merck has made it her mission to urge other vets to report and investigate suspected cases of animal abuse, incorporating a few cautionary tales of her own into her lectures to point up the often dire consequences of failing to do so. One involved a man from Hillsborough County in Florida who was arrested for murdering his girlfriend, her daughter and son and their German shepherd. He had previously been arrested (but not convicted) for killing cats. In another story Merck tells, one related to her by a New York City prosecutor, a woman reported coming home to find her boyfriend sexually molesting her Labrador retriever, but the case never went to trial.

“My point on that one,” Merck told me, “is that no one took precautions to preserve the evidence on the dog. And once it comes down to a he-said-she-said type of situation, you’re lost. These types of cases are difficult enough even when we have all the evidence, in part because it’s very hard for investigators and prosecutors to even consider that someone would do things like this. It’s so disturbing and offensive, they don’t know what to do about it. A lot of the work I do involves not just talking to vets but reaching out to law enforcement to make them more knowledgeable on these matters, to make them understand, for example, that things like sexual assault of children and animals are linked. They are similar victims.”

On our way back to the hotel for an afternoon lecture on forensic entomology, Merck made a little detour to show me the A.S.P.C.A.’s new mobile C.S.I. unit, parked in a side lot of the vet school’s farm-animal compound. Twenty-six-feet long, with its own climate-control, generator, examination room and surgical suite, digital microscope, X-ray machine, sexual-assault kit and anesthesia-oxygen machine, it is essentially a giant emergency room on wheels, allowing Merck and her crew to examine and care for animals at suspected crime scenes and to efficiently analyze and process evidence to ensure its integrity.

The van was an important part of the largest dog-fighting raid in American history last year, in which more than 400 dogs were rescued and 26 people from six states arrested. “We had two forensic teams on board for that,” Merck said. “We had to hit 25 different crime scenes in one day. We hit the first one at 7 a.m., and we finished up at around 6 a.m. the following morning.”

When I asked Merck if she thought incidents of animal cruelty were on the rise or if it was that we are now being more vigilant about them, she said that it is probably more the latter. “We’re more aware now,” she said, “but there is also more of a support system for responding to these incidents. When I started out as a vet 20 years ago, I was one of the few who would call if I got a suspicious case, and that was when such things were still a misdemeanor and it wasn’t law enforcement involved. It was animal control taking care of nuisance animals. Now with veterinarians I tell them you cannot not report, because you don’t know if what you’re seeing on the animal isn’t the proverbial tip of the iceberg.”

Merck then recalled for me a personal experience she most likes to relate in classes and seminars, what she’s dubbed “the tale of the good Samaritan and the savvy vet.” An Atlanta contractor pulled up to a house one morning where he was to perform some work. As he got out of his truck, he heard a dog screaming from the house next door, went over to investigate and saw through an open garage door a dog dragging its back legs and a woman standing beside it. The woman instantly began pleading to the contractor that the dog needed to be euthanized, but she said she couldn’t afford the vet bills. The contractor offered to take the dog to his vet, who, upon examining the dog, agreed that it was too debilitated to be saved. He then told the contractor that there was something suspicious about the case and that he was going to report it to animal services for whom Merck worked at the time as a consultant outside of her daily vet practice.

“They asked me to perform a necropsy,” Merck told me. “It turns out the dog was paralyzed from having been beaten so often. I reported what I found. Police went to the woman’s house to make an arrest. They found a badly bruised boy. And just like that both parents are being hauled off for child abuse. So there was a classic case of the system working like it should.”

Last November, Lockwoodwas asked to testify at the pretrial hearing in which a judge ruled that Tremayne and Travers Johnson would be tried as adults for the burning of Phoenix in Baltimore last year. Lockwood looked at dozens of pictures of Phoenix in order to select which images to present to A.S.P.C.A. staff members. “I could only find one that wasn’t overwhelmingly disturbing,” he told me. “It’s where she’s so bundled up in gauze and bandages you can’t really see anything. It’s easy to empathize with burns because we’ve all been burned, and even if it’s only minor, you realize how painful that is.”

The matter of empathy, of course, goes to the heart of most of our inquiries into the nature of cruel acts and their possible causes. There seems to be little doubt anymore about the notion that a person’s capacity for empathy can be eroded; that someone can have, as Lockwood put it to me, “their empathy beaten or starved out of them.” To date, little is known about the Johnson twins’ background beyond the fact that they both reportedly have chronic truancy issues and previous probation violations and were recently involved with a gang. Along with possible early abuse or genetic and biological components, Lockwood also spoke of the frequent association between environment and acts of violence, how poverty often creates the sense of persecution and injustice that makes some people feel justified in striking back in order to gain the sense of power and control they otherwise lack.

“What I have the most trouble relating to,” Lockwood told me, “and the Phoenix kids might be indicative of this sort of thing, is the kind of cruelty that happens just out of boredom. I’ve had quite a few cases where I ask a kid, Why did you blow up that frog or set fire to that cat? and they don’t respond with answers like ‘I hate cats’ or ‘I didn’t see that as a living thing.’ Their answer is ‘We were bored.’ And then you have to ask yourself, Well, what about alternative pathways to alleviating this boredom? I have difficulty grasping what would be the payoff for setting fire to a dog.”

Neuroscientists are now beginning to get a fix on the physical underpinnings of empathy. A research team at the University of Chicago headed by Jean Decety, a neuroscientist who specializes in the mechanisms behind empathy and emotional self-regulation, has performed fMRI scans on 16-to-18-year-old boys with aggressive-conduct disorder and on another group of similarly aged boys who exhibited no unusual signs of aggression.

Each group was shown videos of people enduring both accidental pain, like stubbing a toe, and intentionally inflicted pain, like being punched in the arm. In the scans, both groups displayed a similar activation of their empathic neural circuitry, and in some cases, the boys with conduct disorder exhibited considerably more activity than those in the control group. But what really caught the attention of the researchers was the fact that when viewing the videos of intentionally inflicted pain, the aggressive-disorder teenagers displayed extremely heightened activity in the part of our brain known as the reward center, which is activated when we feel sensations of pleasure. They also displayed, unlike the control group, no activity at all in those neuronal regions involved in moral reasoning and self-regulation.

“We’re really just beginning to have an inkling of the neurophysiology of empathy,” Lockwood told me. “I think empathy is essentially innate, but I also think empathy can be learned, and I know it can be destroyed. That’s why having a better understanding of the neurophysiology will really help us. Just doing a social intervention on a person doesn’t do any good if you’re not aware of certain physiological deficits. As I heard someone put it at a recent lecture I attended, that would be like an orthopedist telling someone with a broken arm to lift weights. It won’t do anything until the arm is set, and it actually might make things worse. I try to understand who the kids are who seem beyond reach, who seem to have truly impaired systems of empathy. And then I ask, Can that be restored?”

It turns out that just as recent brain-imaging studies have begun to reveal the physical evidence of empathy’s erosion, they are now also beginning to show definitive signs of its cultivation as well. A group of researchers led by Richard Davidson, a professor of psychiatry and psychology at the University of Wisconsin, Madison, published a study in a March 2008 edition of the Public Library of Science One, showing that the mere act of thinking compassionate thoughts caused significant activity and physical changes in the brain’s empathic pathways. “People are not just stuck at their respective set points,” Davidson has said of the study’s results. “We can take advantage of our brain’s plasticity and train it to enhance these qualities. . . . I think this can be one of the tools we use to teach emotional regulation to kids who are at an age where they’re vulnerable to going seriously off track.”

To date, one of the most promising methods for healing those whose empathic pathways have been stunted by things like repeated exposure to animal cruelty is, poetically enough, having such victims work with animals. Kids who tend to be completely unresponsive to human counselors and who generally shun physical and emotional closeness with people often find themselves talking openly to, often crying in front of, a horse — a creature that can often be just as strong-willed and unpredictable as they are and yet in no way judgmental, except, of course, for a natural aversion to loud, aggressive human behaviors.

Equine-therapy programs, for example, are now helping an increasing number of teenagers who have severe emotional and behavioral issues, as well as children with autism and Asperger’s syndrome. At Aspen Ranch in Loa, Utah, troubled teenagers are being paired off with wild mustangs that have been adopted from the Bureau of Land Management, each species ultimately managing to temper the other, a dynamic that has also proved very effective in teaching patience and empathy to prisoners in correctional facilities. In the Los Angeles suburb of Compton, there is a youth equestrian program called the Compton Junior Posse. Teenagers clean stables, groom horses and then ride them in amateur equestrian events across Southern California. There are now bovine- and elephant-assisted therapy programs as well.

For Lockwood, animal-therapy programs draw on the same issues of power and control that can give rise to animal cruelty, but elegantly reverse them to more enlightened ends. “When you get an 80-pound kid controlling a 1,000-pound horse,” he said, “or a kid teaching a dog to obey you and to do tricks, that’s getting a sense of power and control in a positive way. We all have within us the agents of entropy, especially as kids. It’s easier to delight in knocking things down and blowing stuff up. Watch kids in a park and you see them throw rocks at birds to get a whole cloud of them to scatter. But to lure animals in and teach them to take food from your hand or to obey commands, that’s a slower process. Part of the whole enculturation and socialization process is learning that it’s also cool and empowering to build something. To do something constructive.”

Charles Siebert, a contributing writer.

"Where are you going to put that?"

2010-05-18T12:14:00.005+11:30

I just finished watching a marathon run of "Buried Alive". To refresh your memory or give you some insight it is a program on A & E discussing and witnessing hoarders. I've seen this program on occasion for the past year or so...always being critical of the people that live the life of a hoarder.

It is easy to be critical but in my case it was more a case of 'for the grace of God, there go I". I think I know exactly when it started. I became the sole heir of my aunt's, mother's and father's 'stuff'. It was in very rapid sucession, I didn't have time to grieve, so I hung on to everything in hopes of a later garage sale.

The garage sale never materialized. In fact I moved across the country at a huge expense to keep all of the 'stuff'. A huge barn was built....just to shelter that 'stuff'. The storage units here were prohibitive since I needed several.

The initial moving in of the 'stuff' was exhilerating. I loved it, it reminded me of Christmas. "OH look, remember this?" And on and on. The barn is packed to the gills. I thought I would test the waters of the Eastern Shore and see how things progressed here.

I thought of a shop....consignment and used items. Most of our little downtown is vacant with more than enough space for this venture. But I was told early on....do not attempt to operate a business here....they won't come.

More than a few such attempts were made these past ten years but that advice still holds true....all failed for one reason or another...most important ....they did not come.

I also found out that Memorial Day and Labor Day are big garage sale days here. In some instances a whole village gets together and they run a sale block after block. Not my town.

The second year I tried to sort things out in the barn, I was making headway and ran across a snake. That was it for me. My fear is unreasonable but debilitating. We do have copperheads and I was not about to reach into a box with a nest of coppers nope not me.

While I still lived in Arizona I bought things....like the hoarders....to put into a shop in my new hometown. That only added to the mountain of junk. If my life depended upon it I couldn't tell you ten years later what is all in that barn.

My health deteriorated as well over the years. I traded my arthritic hip for fibromyalgia....what a bargain. This is tricky at best....when you feel grand what to do first. If the weather isn't co-operating your choice is made for you.

Now to get back to the hoarders....I sometimes feel their pain in letting go. What an awful feeling, after all it is just "stuff". I am the woman who on more than one occasion said the next time I move....it will be one suitcase and me walking down the driveway. Ha.

It is spring....memorial day is approaching faster and faster. I really want to get a set of dishes out of the barn to use in my house. I know this is ridiculous but I just can't make myself go into that place. Why oh why didn't I use these past ten years to overcome my fear of snakes, probably there is no such person here to help in that area.

Seriously....I think it has been too cold up until now for snake activity....maybe I'll chance it......or maybe I won't. Be careful out there....lots of stuff..RD

A Population Explosion that Requires Immediate Attention.

2010-04-26T10:27:00.002+11:30

I really do not remember when I began to use Facebook, at any rate it must be some time ago. I went there for the games and just to veg out. It has indeed served that purpose and more. Many of my friends were there and it was much like not missing a step from old '360'.

But there is so much more on Facebook. Do you have an interest? It can and will fill that void in a most enjoyable way. You don't have to commit, or pay an entrance fee. I am interested in multitudes of things, including gardening, cooking,keeping perverts off of this site and animals.

Here is where I began to get caught up in a whirlpool of sorts. One thing leading to another. No one was pulling at me to join every other rescue agency known on this continent or any other. I did so out of curiosity, and a willingness to help if needed.

No sooner had I signed on to one then another and another group wanted me to take a look-see. I did so because I am polite and do know the pitfalls of the rescuing business. I gave that up some ten years ago, nope, I wasn't going to fall into that 24/7 trap again. It is endless, and keeps escalating into more bizarre needs than the human mind can comprehend. At least I can't.

To give you an example of the hideousness of the problem I get no less than 100 groups parading one sad faced dog or cat on the internet day after day. No, they are not always sad faced....some of them show a spunk for life and have no idea that theirs is about to be cut short.

Mine was not a unique dilemma....I never wanted to become hardened to the fact that this is happening right under our patrician noses day in and day out. So unless I want to return to my former life of a rescuer and sit in remote places under the cover of darkness listening for the click of the trap door closing I saw no way to be of help.

Let me revisit that time.....we had a plethora of help. Vets, volunteers, foster homes and lots of donations. We did this all before the internet and managed just fine in most instances.

My main concern is the over-abundance of one particular breed of dog that is either running loose or is relinquished by their owner ..... the pit bull. Oh, what a maligned breed this is. It is a relatively new breed to the United States but the population explosion is drowning us all.

The photos that I mentioned are largly pics of pitties. Yes up to 60% are pitties. Now I am aware that Riverside County in Calif has a day set aside for free pit spay/neuter. Isn't that grand? That is just one example. Other cities like Denver have banned pit bulls, which unfortunately does very little for the pit bull.

I want to do something. I want to have a fresh start with this breed...like Disney doing a film about pits that show their inherant loyalty, intellegence, strength. But thinking ahead....what if Disney were to take this on and the pitti looked so good to children that they would just run up to them and try to hug them and in the process get mauled?

Here is the rub, my friends, its all about the owners. How do we know how this pup grew up? We don't. He more than likely was purchased out of a department store push cart at a flea market or out of a trunk of a car. Is there money in this? I kind of doubt it. Do the purchasers have any idea what they are commiting to? I kinda doubt that as well. Do they know this breed is extremely active? Do they have any idea how much money a pet costs? Forget about getting spayed or neutered. Nope, I think not....but they sure do look bad and mean on the end of a chain that is designed for pulling big rigs out of ditches.

Many people have tried unsuccessfully to remedy this situation. How many of the people that partake in the free spay/neuter services of Riverside County do you think are of the macho kind just having a pit for an ornament?

I know I haven't even touched the problelm....yet day in and day out pitties are losing the battle. They have become a large part of our disposable society. How can we help this breed? How can we prevent flea market sales? How can we prevent the utter abuse? I'm at a loss. RD

How to Play Hearts....Virginia Shaefer

2010-03-24T13:24:00.002+11:30

Women's History Month...A woman's Shortcomings EB Browning

2010-03-12T04:00:00.000+11:30

A Woman’s Shortcomings

Elizabeth Barrett Browning (1846)

She has laughed as softly as if she sighed,
She has counted six, and over,
Of a purse well filled, and a heart well tried —
Oh, each a worthy lover!
They “give her time”; for her soul must slip
Where the world has set the grooving;
She will lie to none with her fair red lip:
But love seeks truer loving.

She trembles her fan in a sweetness dumb,
As her thoughts were beyond recalling;
With a glance for one, and a glance for some,
From her eyelids rising and falling;
Speaks common words with a blushful air,
Hears bold words, unreproving;
But her silence says — what she never will swear —
And love seeks better loving.

Go, lady! lean to the night-guitar,
And drop a smile to the bringer;
Then smile as sweetly, when he is far,
At the voice of an in-door singer.
Bask tenderly beneath tender eyes;
Glance lightly, on their removing;
And join new vows to old perjuries —
But dare not call it loving!

Unless you can think, when the song is done,
No other is soft in the rhythm;
Unless you can feel, when left by One,
That all men else go with him;
Unless you can know, when unpraised by his breath,
That your beauty itself wants proving;
Unless you can swear “For life, for death!” —
Oh, fear to call it loving!

Unless you can muse in a crowd all day
On the absent face that fixed you;
Unless you can love, as the angels may,
With the breadth of heaven betwixt you;
Unless you can dream that his faith is fast,
Through behoving and unbehoving;
Unless you can die when the dream is past —
Oh, never call it loving

When do Yu Talk to God?

2010-03-05T04:01:00.002+11:30

I usually have conversations with God or whoever is that greater power on a daily basis. I also talk to my deceased parents as well. It isn't about asking to have the mortgage miraculously paid or for health issues to be shown their walking papers.I can honestly say that when a situation arises and I know my resources are limited in this area I ask for guidance. "Show me a way".

I don't want to let anyone down, especially myself and play the fool. I do as much as I can on my end to meet my expectations and then I chat with that higher power to guide me in the appropriate direction. Why am I telling you about this....because it isn't working this time. I usually have been shown a path to follow, not always to my liking or expedient as I might like but this time I cannot find a way to accept that I must let go of a friend.

He has been a light in my life for many years. He has made me laugh and cry at his story telling. He always had the right thing to say. Now I cannot reciprocate. Least of all I do not want to make this more difficult on him, he seems to care more about my feelings and thoughts than the torment he is experiencing.

Talk about stiff upper lip....this guy has it in spades. He is indeed teaching me something as his time draws shorter. This is what I should take away from this friendship. But I want to give something back. I don't want to appear weak, yet I know I do.

An online friend just happenchance mentioned Kubler Ross today. Oh, yes, I need to revisit that. I read it when it first was published and found it to be remarkably informative.

It is just ridiculous to try to intellectualize these life changes. We have feelings and they must be released. I am not questioning the why as some do....just the ability to put my sadness aside and be strong for my friend. Take care my friends... Life is short. RD

Ash Wednesday......T.S. Eliot

2010-02-18T07:26:00.000+11:30

Page Back
Poetry Index
Ash Wednesday - a poem by T S Eliot

Ash Wednesday
T.S. Eliot

Because I do not hope to turn again
Because I do not hope
Because I do not hope to turn
Desiring this man's gift and that man's scope
I no longer strive to strive towards such things
(Why should the agèd eagle stretch its wings?)
Why should I mourn
The vanished power of the usual reign?

Because I do not hope to know
The infirm glory of the positive hour
Because I do not think
Because I know I shall not know
The one veritable transitory power
Because I cannot drink
There, where trees flower, and springs flow, for there is
nothing again

Because I know that time is always time
And place is always and only place
And what is actual is actual only for one time
And only for one place
I rejoice that things are as they are and
I renounce the blessèd face
And renounce the voice
Because I cannot hope to turn again
Consequently I rejoice, having to construct something
Upon which to rejoice

And pray to God to have mercy upon us
And pray that I may forget
These matters that with myself I too much discuss
Too much explain
Because I do not hope to turn again
Let these words answer
For what is done, not to be done again
May the judgement not be too heavy upon us

Because these wings are no longer wings to fly
But merely vans to beat the air
The air which is now thoroughly small and dry
Smaller and dryer than the will
Teach us to care and not to care Teach us to sit still.

Pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death
Pray for us now and at the hour of our death.

II
Lady, three white leopards sat under a juniper-tree
In the cool of the day, having fed to sateity
On my legs my heart my liver and that which had been
contained
In the hollow round of my skull. And God said
Shall these bones live? shall these
Bones live? And that which had been contained
In the bones (which were already dry) said chirping:
Because of the goodness of this Lady
And because of her loveliness, and because
She honours the Virgin in meditation,
We shine with brightness. And I who am here dissembled
Proffer my deeds to oblivion, and my love
To the posterity of the desert and the fruit of the gourd.
It is this which recovers
My guts the strings of my eyes and the indigestible portions
Which the leopards reject. The Lady is withdrawn
In a white gown, to contemplation, in a white gown.
Let the whiteness of bones atone to forgetfulness.
There is no life in them. As I am forgotten
And would be forgotten, so I would forget
Thus devoted, concentrated in purpose. And God said
Prophesy to the wind, to the wind only for only
The wind will listen. And the bones sang chirping
With the burden of the grasshopper, saying

Lady of silences
Calm and distressed
Torn and most whole
Rose of memory
Rose of forgetfulness
Exhausted and life-giving
Worried reposeful
The single Rose
Is now the Garden
Where all loves end
Terminate torment
Of love unsatisfied
The greater torment
Of love satisfied
End of the endless
Journey to no end
Conclusion of all that
Is inconclusible
Speech without word and
Word of no speech
Grace to the Mother
For the Garden
Where all love ends.

Under a juniper-tree the bones sang, scattered and shining
We are glad to be scattered, we did little good to each other,
Under a tree in the cool of day, with the blessing of sand,
Forgetting themselves and each other, united
In the quiet of the desert. This is the land which ye
Shall divide by lot. And neither division nor unity
Matters. This is the land. We have our inheritance.

III

At the first turning of the second stair
I turned and saw below
The same shape twisted on the banister
Under the vapour in the fetid air
Struggling with the devil of the stairs who wears
The deceitul face of hope and of despair.

At the second turning of the second stair
I left them twisting, turning below;
There were no more faces and the stair was dark,
Damp, jaggèd, like an old man's mouth drivelling, beyond
repair,
Or the toothed gullet of an agèd shark.

At the first turning of the third stair
Was a slotted window bellied like the figs's fruit
And beyond the hawthorn blossom and a pasture scene
The broadbacked figure drest in blue and green
Enchanted the maytime with an antique flute.
Blown hair is sweet, brown hair over the mouth blown,
Lilac and brown hair;
Distraction, music of the flute, stops and steps of the mind
over the third stair,
Fading, fading; strength beyond hope and despair
Climbing the third stair.

Lord, I am not worthy
Lord, I am not worthy

but speak the word only.

IV
Who walked between the violet and the violet
Whe walked between
The various ranks of varied green
Going in white and blue, in Mary's colour,
Talking of trivial things
In ignorance and knowledge of eternal dolour
Who moved among the others as they walked,
Who then made strong the fountains and made fresh the
springs

Made cool the dry rock and made firm the sand
In blue of larkspur, blue of Mary's colour,
Sovegna vos

Here are the years that walk between, bearing
Away the fiddles and the flutes, restoring
One who moves in the time between sleep and waking,
wearing

White light folded, sheathing about her, folded.
The new years walk, restoring
Through a bright cloud of tears, the years, restoring
With a new verse the ancient rhyme. Redeem
The time. Redeem
The unread vision in the higher dream
While jewelled unicorns draw by the gilded hearse.

The silent sister veiled in white and blue
Between the yews, behind the garden god,
Whose flute is breathless, bent her head and signed but
spoke no word

But the fountain sprang up and the bird sang down
Redeem the time, redeem the dream
The token of the word unheard, unspoken

Till the wind shake a thousand whispers from the yew

And after this our exile

V
If the lost word is lost, if the spent word is spent
If the unheard, unspoken
Word is unspoken, unheard;
Still is the unspoken word, the Word unheard,
The Word without a word, the Word within
The world and for the world;
And the light shone in darkness and
Against the Word the unstilled world still whirled
About the centre of the silent Word.

O my people, what have I done unto thee.

Where shall the word be found, where will the word
Resound? Not here, there is not enough silence
Not on the sea or on the islands, not
On the mainland, in the desert or the rain land,
For those who walk in darkness
Both in the day time and in the night time
The right time and the right place are not here
No place of grace for those who avoid the face
No time to rejoice for those who walk among noise and deny
the voice

Will the veiled sister pray for
Those who walk in darkness, who chose thee and oppose
thee,
Those who are torn on the horn between season and season,
time and time, between
Hour and hour, word and word, power and power, those who
wait
In darkness? Will the veiled sister pray
For children at the gate
Who will not go away and cannot pray:
Pray for those who chose and oppose

O my people, what have I done unto thee.

Will the veiled sister between the slender
Yew trees pray for those who offend her
And are terrified and cannot surrender
And affirm before the world and deny between the rocks
In the last desert before the last blue rocks
The desert in the garden the garden in the desert
Of drouth, spitting from the mouth the withered apple-seed.

O my people.

VI
Although I do not hope to turn again
Although I do not hope
Although I do not hope to turn

Wavering between the profit and the loss
In this brief transit where the dreams cross
The dreamcrossed twilight between birth and dying
(Bless me father) though I do not wish to wish these things
From the wide window towards the granite shore
The white sails still fly seaward, seaward flying
Unbroken wings

And the lost heart stiffens and rejoices
In the lost lilac and the lost sea voices
And the weak spirit quickens to rebel
For the bent golden-rod and the lost sea smell
Quickens to recover
The cry of quail and the whirling plover
And the blind eye creates
The empty forms between the ivory gates
And smell renews the salt savour of the sandy earth

This is the time of tension between dying and birth
The place of solitude where three dreams cross
Between blue rocks
But when the voices shaken from the yew-tree drift away
Let the other yew be shaken and reply.

Blessèd sister, holy mother, spirit of the fountain, spirit of the
garden,
Suffer us not to mock ourselves with falsehood
Teach us to care and not to care
Teach us to sit still
Even among these rocks,
Our peace in His will
And even among these rocks
Sister, mother
And spirit of the river, spirit of the sea,
Suffer me not to be separated

And let my cry come unto Thee.

Ash Wednesday
T.S. Eliot

The Passing of an Old Goat

2010-02-04T05:29:00.002+11:30

I recently read a story about remembering an old goat. Never the flashiest, or fastest nor the one to beg for food from humans but his presence was always felt more than seen. He was one of a clan who were rescued about 15 years ago...plenty of time to make an impression. And he did....by his dignity, and quiet manner.

Now why did this story affect me so? Why is it still fresh in my memory days after reading about him? Because I could relate.

Not that I'm ready to pack it in but he and I suffer from the same disease...arthritis. Our lives seem to run parallel in ways that only a fellow traveller could empathize with. Our days of roaming large parcels of land or for me working are essentially over.

I cannot help but think that our new environments are restrictive in many ways,not only square footage. It is a curtain that you are essentially in control of ... will it fall down today or will there be a better tomorrow? Arthritis is funny that way, you never can plan ahead. There are better days and simply awful ones. You cope.

Things you want to accomplish get cast aside for the moment, well, tomorrow will be better. Yes indeed, that is often times the case and you push on. Getting this or that done in the nick of time before things seem to freeze up again. It is not a matter of will it is a matter of 'can'.

This is frustratingly new to me. And I often think I should be finding a way to overcome without getting angry. I need to focus on today no matter how limited my efforts. But unlike the dignified goat I rant and rave and yes there are days I give up.

I have finally found a rheumatologist in these parts. Yes, only by happenchance listening to a conversation in a waiting room did I learn of one. I asked for a referral and got it and am waiting my three months to be seen. See, there is hope.

I learned later that this physician changed his speciality only three years ago seeing the ultimate need in this community for his services. And believe me there is a need and thus the three month wait to be seen.

Since there is the glimmer of hope and perhaps some relief ahead I think I can manage what the goat did.....have a little dignity.

Take care on these icy roads. See you very soon.RD

Winter Nights Enlarge

2010-01-27T15:11:00.000+11:30

Now Winter Nights Enlarge
by Thomas Campion

Now winter nights enlarge
This number of their hours;
And clouds their storms discharge
Upon the airy towers.
Let now the chimneys blaze
And cups o'erflow with wine,
Let well-tuned words amaze
With harmony divine.
Now yellow waxen lights
Shall wait on honey love
While youthful revels, masques, and courtly sights
Sleep's leaden spells remove.

This time doth well dispense
With lovers' long discourse;
Much speech hath some defense,
Though beauty no remorse.
All do not all things well:
Some measures comely tread,
Some knotted riddles tell,
Some poems smoothly read.
The summer hath his joys,
And winter his delights;
Though love and all his pleasures are but toys
They shorten tedious nights.

The Danger Of Writing Defiant Verse..Dorothy Parker

2010-01-20T12:53:00.000+11:30

The Danger Of Writing Defiant Verse
BY
Dorothy Parker

Buy Parker's Poetic Works

And now I have another lad!
No longer need you tell
How all my nights are slow and sad
For loving you too well.

His ways are not your wicked ways,
He's not the like of you.
He treads his path of reckoned days,
A sober man, and true.

They'll never see him in the town,
Another on his knee.
He'd cut his laden orchards down,
If that would pleasure me.

He'd give his blood to paint my lips
If I should wish them red.
He prays to touch my finger-tips
Or stroke my prideful head.

He never weaves a glinting lie,
Or brags the hearts he'll keep.
I have forgotten how to sigh-
Remembered how to sleep.

He's none to kiss away my mind-
A slower way is his.
Oh, Lord! On reading this, I find
A silly lot he is.

Bloggers Block

2010-01-17T05:44:00.002+11:30

Incase you hadn't noticed....I've got a real case of blogger's block. I did what I usually do and roam around the internet reading other blogs to get inspired. That usually works. One little sentence or even a cooking recipe can jog my memory into something that happened to me.

Usually a good tool but not lately. Making sure I am politically correct leaves very little room for imagination. I don't feel that I go out of my way to offend, but I do. Someone will find something offensive about anything. They usually tell me in my comments section which is what I encourage.

I've been called on the carpet recently on something I didn't write, and made the appropriate acknowledgements to the Los Angeles Times. But that wasn't good enough. Apparently I must do a maya culpa and fall on my sword simply because I found this particular article interesting.

The week before that I posted the "Get Over Yourself" article and that was written by me and found more folks agreeing than disagreeing. But there is always the exception....for that benign article as well.

You can't please everyone all of the time...that is a given. You can't control what your readers will say in response to one thing or another. Yet blogging has become more and more restrictive. You now must police your readership and call them on something utterly childish or insensitive in their beliefs.

I wholeheartedly agree that if something gets out of hand and personalities are trod upon "call the offender on it". I did do that, but feel too much like a school marm disciplining rather than teaching. What a bloody waste of time. "IF you can't behave you can't come to my sight anymore". huh...we are all adults, why not act like one.

Misunderstandings are at the crux of these petty outbursts. Either make yourself perfectly clear in your article or you invite this type of squabbling, and time consuming making nice. I don't make nice too often, I rather use the 'delete' button and get on with it.

Think about it....you are talking to perfect strangers, so why wouldn't objections be raised? Take care of it, clarify yourself and if that does not satisfy click, click and they are gone.

Don't get me wrong...there is always room for improvement. There are acceptable ways of voicing your opposition without becoming a shrew spewing personal attacks. Let's grow up! Writer and reader alike.

Although I began by stating my blogger block I will close with the idea that this has become more of a burdon than a relaxation excercise. Careful, careful careful you just may have stepped on someone's toes.

Drive carefully, dress warm, and don't forget your umbrella.RD

Biscuits for Shelter Dogs

2010-01-15T07:48:00.000+11:30

Biscuits for Shelter Dogs
Posted by Janine Allen at Wednesday, January 13th, 2010.

We all have had to make budget cuts in recent times. Here’s a way for dog owners to help shelter dogs without having to reach further into their pockets.

Barkin Doggie Biscuits will donate an equal amount of dog biscuits to a shelter for every amount of biscuits that you order. Check out their three delicious choices of fresh mint, pumpkin and peanut butter. A nice way to share the wealth with puppies less fortunate than your own.

Rescue Me Dog commends any organization or individual who helps make the lives of shelter dogs a little more comfortable.

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE? You can, as long as you include the following, complete statement and a link back to the original article:

http://rescuemedog.org/dog-blog/biscuits-shelter-dogs/

Written by Janine Allen CPDT, Rescue Me Dog's professional dog trainer. Janine's passion is working with people and their dogs. She provides demonstrations for those who have adopted shelter dogs, lends email support to adopted dog owners that need information beyond our Training Support Pages, and aids shelter staff and volunteers in understanding dog behavior to increase their adoptability. Copyright 2010 Rescue Me Dog; www.rescuemedog.org

The Sleeping Mind

2010-01-12T15:55:00.001+11:30

THE SLEEPING MIND

Come wander through my sleeping mind

See what treasures you might find.

Memories of so long ago

A pristine world clad in pure snow.

A voice that rang with lovely song

That spoke of love when I was young.

Bypass the long dark corridor;

Look not beyond the painted door.;

For there waits agony and pain.

These are the demons in my brain.

I cry aloud for God to hear

And ease the torment that I fear.

Why did such evil come to me?

I was blinded and could not see

Satan waiting in dark disguise

Laughing as he bespoke his lies.

The doors of Hell were opened wide;

When God at last came to my side.

With God's help my demons were banished.

Satan and his cohorts all vanished.

I was free to fulfill at last

God's plan for me which was vast.

To write the words that set man free;

To live in peace and harmony.

~Florence Picciotti

Get Over Yourself.

2010-01-02T04:50:00.002+11:30

Here it is....the first day of the brand new year 2010. Isn't it great to type out these numbers? So easy. I respond on some inner level to 'even' numbers. I like them,I always choose them although I've never won the lottery with them they give me comfort. That is how I feel about the upcoming year. Not ridiculously over the top but I do see some light at the end of this tunnel.

Keep this in mind "Fool! The Ideal is in thyself, the impediment too is in thyself: thy Condition is but the stuff thou art to shape that same Ideal out of: what matters whether such stuff be of this sort or that, so the Form thou give it be heroic, be poetic? O thou that pinest in the imprisonment of the Actual, and criest bitterly to the gods for a kingdom wherein to rule and create, know this of a truth: the thing thou seekest is already with thee, ‘here or nowhere,’ couldst thou only see!"
— Thomas Carlyle (Sartor Resartus)

Ain't that just the truth. The adult pout is out. Each and every situation I have ever written about and you have experienced mentions at length the negative. And why not .... that is so much more entertaining, amusing or companion to the written word. The lesson learned....not so earth shattering. If nothing else it broadcasts to everyone your narrow mindedness, your shallowness to ignore the obvious.

I speak from years and years of experience. And the statement "it could'a been worse " is just as bad. The telling of the tale should be spontaneous, off the cuff and with appropriate humor as well. The contrived, researched tale told as truth and spontaneous fools no one. It resembles a sophomoric book report that you are passing off as real life.

The pout is out.....means that we must make a 180 degree turn and an earnest search for that crumb of information that may ultimately light up someone Else's light bulb. Perhaps something can be gained when you are told this flight is totally booked and you find out later it crashed in the Rockies.

Doing for others, not always humans, gives us much satisfaction, subject material, and insight into human nature. The enemy in my eyes is the social networking epidemic of the unadulterated me, me generation. Here is the forum where you can talk about yourself til kingdom come.

Initially you pull readers in but slowly but surely they go on to the next messiah, inventor, sage. And why not? You bored them to death.

Come on....it is the fresh start of the new year and its time to get over yourself. RD

A Happy New Year To You

2009-12-30T03:50:00.001+11:30

HAPPY NEW YEAR'S TO YOU
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A new year is beginning to peak through
softly beautiful and different like new falling snow,
each day unique and shaped just for you.
Your life adding something as each day does grow.
My wish for your new year is beauty
and softness with surprises thrown in for delight.
Love for each day bringing happiness to you,
making your life a scene of sparkle and shining sunlight.
-- Author Unknown

Saying Goodbye

2009-12-28T08:44:00.002+11:30

I don't think anyone has come up with a cure or antidote for saying goodbye under any circumstances in a more dignified way. Well, let me just say, it isn't particularly dignity I'm seeking just a sincere emotion that you will be missed, you are gone but not forgotten,I will miss you terribly, you can never be replaced nor would I ever try.

We lost a cat on Christmas Day. He was a wonderful sort....I should know I have quite a selection to choose from. His passing was not our first...we have a cat sanctuary and we have lost a few. Each and every time it is not unlike this being our only cat. At the time, he is indeed all that comes to mind.

It is a loss damnit...no matter who. You continue to fill his bowl...how long will that last? You still see him on his favorite rug, or in his favorite bed. Is that to make our transition of his not being there less painful? I don't know but at times it does feel like he is still here.

I said my "goodbye" as he was being carried out to the car, I knew he would never return. And he did not. I carry his memory with me. I can look at photos, but dear Klondike you are missed. RIP RD

Merry Christmas to all.

2009-12-26T03:49:00.001+11:30

And the angel said unto them, "Fear not! For, behold, I bring you tidings of great joy, Which shall be to all people. "For unto you is born this day in the city of David A Saviour, which is Christ the Lord. And this shall be a sign unto you: Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, Lying in a manger. - St. Luke 10-12

The Romantic History of Italian Panettone. by Mirella Sichirollo Patzer

2009-12-23T05:06:00.000+11:30

Dec
08
The Romantic History of Italian Panettone
Filed Under (Breads), (Cakes), (Desserts), (Novelty), (Traditional) by Mirella Sichirollo Patzer on Tuesday, December 8, 2009 In Italian folklore, it is widely believed that Panettone originated in the city of Milano in northern Italy during the 15th century. It became instantly popular. Today, hundreds of years later, people around the world continue to enjoy the sweet bread. It was originally called Tony's Bread or Pan de Tonio . The name has since evolved to become known as the panettone we enjoy today.

As with all ancient recipes, several legends circulate about how is one came into being. Here is the most popular, and most romantic of the versions. How typical of the Italians to meld together romance and food.

In the city of Milano in northern Italy during the 15th century, there lived a baker named Tony who had a beautiful daughter named Adalgisa. A wealthy young man, Ughetto della Tela, fell in love with the beauty and wanted to marry her, but he knew his family would oppose the marriage because she was a commoner.

Ughetto, a quiet, studious man, worked as a hawk breeder in the court of Duke Ludovico Maria Sforza. Undaunted in his quest to marry Adalgisa, he began to secretly meet the lovely young woman late at night, far from prying eyes. Meeting at such odd hours made a lot of sense because Adalgisa was required to start mixing the bread in the wee hours of the morning in her father’s bakery.

Soon, a strange series of misfortunes befell Tony. A new bakery opened nearby and he began to lose clients. Then he fell ill. This left Adalgisa to do all the work in the bakery, including all the heavy chores.

The gallant Ughetto seized upon this misfortunes and offered himself to assist her. He wanted to improve the bread by adding some butter to the mix, but the struggling bakery had no money to buy the additional ingredient, which was very expensive at the time. So Ughetto sold a few of his prized hawks and with the money purchased all the butter needed.

The bread was an immediate success. Loaves disappeared from the shelves. When Ughetto decided to add a little sugar to the recipe, it became even more popular. Soon word about the tasty bread spread. The beautiful Adalgisa smiled, for the bakery was once again turning a profit. Happy to see his beloved happy once more, Ughetto decided to improve upon the recipe once more. This time, he added candied citron and eggs. At Christimas time, he added raisins. Now the bread really became a huge success, well known throughout the entire city of Milano. Tony's bakery prospered and he became very wealthy.

Without hesitation, Ughetto's family approved the marriage to the wealthy young woman and Ughetto and Adalgisa were soon married. Their secret recipe and other bakers soon began to imitate the bread, ever-increasing quantities to satisfy the palates of Italians.

Today, the bread is produced and shipped throughout the world. It is always given away as gifts and graces the tables of all Italians at Christmas.

Once December hits, I find myself making panettone almost daily. My family loves it. Here is my favourite recipe, easily made in the bread machine:

Mirella Patzer's Panettone

3 1/4 cups bread flour (divided)
1/4 cup each golden raisins
1/4 cup candied mixed peel
1/4 cup milk
3 eggs, beaten
2 egg yolks, beaten
1/2 cup softened butter
1 tsp anise extract
1/3 cup granulated sugar
1/2 tsp salt
1 tsp fresh grated orange peel
1 tsp fress grated lemon peel
2 tsp yeast

Mix 1 tbsp of the flour with raisins, candied peel and citron. Add milk, eggs, butter, vanilla, sugar, salt, orange and lemon peels in bread machine pan or proceed as per manufacturers instructions.

Turn on machine and set to normal/basic bread setting, choosing light color setting if possible. Sprinkle reserved fruit mixture into machine when fruit alarm sounds or just as second kneading is ending. Makes one 1 1/2 lb. loaf.

(If candied mixed peel is not something your family likes, this bread tastes just as good with only the raisins.)

2009-12-23T05:03:00.000+11:30

Imagine My Surprise.....

2009-12-17T01:33:00.002+11:30

I had ordered an artificial christmas tree from Ebay several years ago. It had never been unpacked or really inspected by me. It arrived too late for that year and we made due with the tree we had sans the top. That is another story.

I have great plans every year to not get myself or the rest of the family caught up in a rush to get things up and the tree adorned by Thanksgiving at least. This by the way has never happened. Not that I haven't given it a great deal of thought by at least Halloween. I simply cannot be rushed.

This year I decided the living and dining room needed to have wallpaper removed since the cat had begun the process and it frankly looked awful. This task was not monumental, remove paper, prep, paint. Somewhere between prep and paint I lost my way.

I like to utilize my 'oops' finds. I thought I had the perfect match with the top wallpaper, not so. Then I thought if I did a little home made mixing I would find the exact color.....nope that didn't work either. I do have an abundance of latte colored paint however.

I broke down and bought several gallons of sonoma red. Got it up just in time for Thanksgiving. It looked to me that I had made it, no muss no fuss Christmas stuff next.

Here we go. I finally unwrapped the new tree. It was ordered as a double balsem seven and one half foot tree. Eeeegads look at this I screamed....it is barely five feet tall and some kind of wicked pine. Not unlike a Charlie Brown creation. I already had several table top versions so here was a third of this kind.

In my haste and feverish temper I sprained my knee. Now folks this is painful...to the max it is painful. No amount of rubs, soaking , pills takes away that kind of pain. You limp, you are confined to the first floor and all the ornaments are in the attic. You do not merrily go shopping or caroling with a bum knee. So this too has put a damper on getting things done.

We decided to use all three trees. They range in size of four to five feet tall. We now have a forest of lit trees awaiting ornaments. I must make my way into the attic and grab whatever I can to put on the trees. It has been at least a week so my mobility has improved. Bob unfortunately has a repeat of his sciatica so he is of little assistance.

The thought has crossed my mind.....Do Not Take the Tree Down...We could possibly avoid all of this who ha by having Christmas 24/7 365. Is that a plan?

Be care ful out there the roads can get icey. RD

shore life

2009-12-06T13:13:00.001+11:30

Just a click away.

The diagnosis is in.

2009-12-04T07:37:00.003+11:30

I don't know whether to laugh or cry. I found out yesterday that I have fibromyalgia. Laugh because I had been looking into this disease for many months. Cry because it took so darn long to find out. Actually, with all the people that show symptoms of this disease it is devilish to get this diagnosis in as short a time as I did.

There is a medication out there Savella, which I will begin taking tonite. Ofcourse I read up on this as well. Hey, if I could get a good nights sleep, finish a task in a reasonable amount of time, and not hit a wall everyday at 3pm I'll be good to go.

I waffled between Chronic Fatigue syndrome and Fibromyalgia. They do have alot in common. The good thing is you are granted good days and bad days, on those good days is when I always mention in my blogs that I must make hay. I usually can and do. On those off days, they are really off the chart with pain, and a feeling of wasting away.

After about eight months of getting tests and returning to the physicians office to hear well, it isn't this or that I became frustrated. I stopped going in to hear no news. Then I got a note from the office wanting to see me about my results. Hooray, they have come up with something.

I like to know what I have. I like knowing there is a treatment. I like knowing that I will have ups and downs. And getting used to the fact that I may never be able to handle Lucie is the roughest part.

I've told you I needed to remove wallpaper from the living and dining room. That is done, in fact three layers of paint have been applied. Thank goodness Nicci was there to lend a hand...in fact truth be told, she did the majority of the work. Now that I'm on the home stretch I need to clean up and move furniture. Just can't be done, I close the doors and know it will be there tomorrow.

This was just to let you know why I've been so sporadic in my postings, occasionally on the dark side. I hope that the new meds will put me on a more even road and I will be a bit more responsive.

Heck, I'm really lucky, come to think of it....this diagnosis could have been so much worse. I'll hang in there and deal with the discomfort and moodiness, you can join me for this ride if you like. Remember....there will be good days.

Be careful out there....pickpocket season is upon us. RD

What are you Thankful for?

2009-11-24T13:38:00.002+11:30

Allow Your Own Inner Light to Guide You
There comes a time when you must stand alone.

You must feel confident enough within yourself to follow your own dreams.

You must be willing to make sacrifices.

You must be capable of changing and rearranging your priorities so that your final goal can be achieved.

Sometimes, familiarity and comfort need to be challenged.

There are times when you must take a few extra chances and create your own realities.

Be strong enough to at least try to make your life better.

Be confident enough that you won't settle for a compromise just to get by.

Appreciate yourself by allowing yourself the opportunities to grow, develop, and find your true sense of purpose in this life.

Don't stand in someone else's shadow when it's your sunlight that should lead the wa

After reading this and several other articles I could help myself but to ask you .."What are you thankful for?"

I don't consider myself a religious person, but definitely a spiritual one.Whatever that means to you it more than likely means something entirely different to me. But this is not meant to be a level playing field it is an exchange of ideas.

I want to write down the first thing that comes to mind and keep on listing the wonderful things that have enlightened me this year. What I have found though is that I may indeed take my life for granted in many respects.

I can walk. That is a great thank you from my heart.
I often can paint. The muse is not with me as often as I like but I won't quibble.
I am able to do the things I most want to do, watch my daughter take on the struggles of life and often beat the odds.
I can play games on line with my grandchild. Denied me for over ten years.
Most days I can care for my companions with the help of my computer, and occasionally a visit to a vet I admire.
I can watch the sun rise, if I desire, from my own home.

These are but a very few of the things I am thankful for. How about you? Is your health holding up? Is your family close and supportive? Do you like your life?

One last thought....I will be eternally grateful for not having to eat some of the concoctions I have been seeing on my 'foodie' sites. Oh, I think it is all about fusion fashion. But haven't they gone a bit mad with this? I hope that we won't be seeing these whipped up delights next year. Back to the basics for me.

I'm here to wish you all a wonderful Thanksgiving. Drive safe. RD

Fire Dreams Carl Sandburg (1918)

2009-11-20T04:19:00.000+11:30

Fire Dreams
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from Cornhuskers by Carl Sandburg (1918)
clr gif

(Written to be read aloud, if so be, Thanksgiving Day)

I remember here by the fire,
In the flickering reds and saffrons,
They came in a ramshackle tub,
Pilgrims in tall hats,
Pilgrims of iron jaws,
Drifting by weeks on beaten seas,
And the random chapters say
They were glad and sang to God.

And so
Since the iron-jawed men sat down
And said, “Thanks, O God,”
For life and soup and a little less
Than a hobo handout to-day,
Since gray winds blew gray patterns of sleet on Plymouth Rock,
Since the iron-jawed men sang “Thanks, O God,”
You and I, O Child of the West,
Remember more than ever
November and the hunter’s moon,
November and the yellow-spotted hills.

And so
In the name of the iron-jawed men
I will stand up and say yes till the finish is come and gone.
God of all broken hearts, empty hands, sleeping soldiers,
God of all star-flung beaches of night sky,
I and my love-child stand up together to-day and sing: “Thanks, O God.”

Shore Life: Egomania the new Pandemic

2009-11-14T06:06:00.000+11:30

Shore Life: Egomania the new Pandemic

Egomania the new Pandemic

2009-11-14T05:21:00.002+11:30

It wasn't too long ago that I read the article mentioned in the link. I have been mulling this subject matter around and around. Rather than mulling I decided to write about it only in hopes of getting it off of my mind.

Easier said than done, my friends, I gave birth to an ego maniac. Once the normal span of egomania should evolve into a reality seeking human the problem should go by the wayside like soiled diapers. This is an infantile symptom a part of growing up. Hopefully you emerge fulfilled and go on to the next step in life.

Egomania is an illness of the mind, but I don't think it is thought of as such. It has been given all sorts of room to roam. What I mean is that it is thought of as minor, a me me type of thing that is expected of a select group of people.

I wonder at times.....did I forget to remind this child of reality. How to behave in the real world? I seriously doubt it. My life is steeped in reality and it has little room for one so immersed in themselves there is no space for anything else. But, here again, if this individual will not listen to an authority figure of any sort.....how do you make an impact....or do you?

I've learned that these individuals will achieve their personal goals at any expense. Their satisfaction is primary. Feeling good about themselves is what it is all about. The insidious goal of making others feel fear or worse yet respect for them is what it is all about. We have amongst us these individuals of no morals. If you happen chance mention consideration for others you are automatically considered weak....and prime for their self serving achievements.

Have no doubts they are among us, they are often thought to thrive in our society. Isn't the me me society their playground? But lest we forget....they can also be a victim of him/or herself they can become bullies of major irritation to everyone around them. Is it insecurity that is the driving force behind this behavior or is it a kind of defense mechanism?

Clearly, I have many more questions than answers. On this personal level I made a decision to remove this from my life. I became so tired of pushing away that my arms nearly fell off. I talked myself hoarse. I sought every make and model of intervention and therapy...of no use.

Make no mistake....this is an illness. There are no pills out there to make this person feel compassion or love of others. In fact, this has so many victims left in the path of their self-proclaimed importance that I often feel the slightest twinge of someone trying to push and pull me in their direction I totally pull back. I no longer wonder what makes them tick....I know within a short amount of time I will be a victim.

I'm often told how very strong I am. I'm independent. I feel an enormous amount of compassion for others and do what I can. But this....."done me in".

May your weekend be splendid. Take care. RD

Poppy Day

2009-11-12T05:42:00.000+11:30

November 11, 2009

Veterans deserve respect, gratitude for their sacrifice
By AARON LONDON
TAKING UP SPACE

Whether you think of it as Armistice Day, Poppy Day, Remembrance Day -- assuming you are Canadian -- or Veterans Day, those who are aware that today is a national holiday dedicated to honoring those who served their nation in uniform will be in the minority.

For most Americans -- despite the public service announcements during station breaks in the middle of their favorite television shows tonight that say "Happy Veterans Day" -- today is just another Wednesday. And that is a shame.

In a time when military service has become more important, given conflicts in the Middle East and the post-911 world we live in, most Veterans Day observances today were probably sparsely attended, and mainly by aging veterans and their families along with some elected officials and a handful of citizens.

While today's climate and attitude toward veterans of military service is light years better than what it was in the Vietnam era, when returning soldierscould look forward to jeers, curses and even being spit upon, sometimes it seems as if Americans like to talk a good game rather than play a good game.

And also remember, today is the day to honor veterans. While some commemorations will include words about those who made the ultimate sacrifice -- and they, too, should never be forgotten -- that is Memorial Day, not Veterans Day.

It might seem to be only a small semantic point, but it isn't.

Veterans Day is for veterans. For those men and women who served and sacrificed and took the time out of their lives to put themselves on the line for the greater good. And for that, the least the rest of us can do is remember them and honor them and give them their due on Veterans Day.

But if you forgot to attend that Veterans Day ceremony this morning, all is not lost.

Everyone who forgot today is Veterans Day still has a daily opportunity to thank the veterans in their community for their service and their sacrifice. Just stop by the local VFW or American Legion post and simply offer to shake the hands of the men and women there. Politely thank them for their service and be on your way. Simple, heartfelt and sincere. That is all it takes. A few minutes out of a busy schedule and some good karma for the rest of the day.

With an economy just now beginning to turn around and everyday worries about children, families, finances and what to cook for dinner, it's easy to overlook things like Veterans Day -- even more so this time of year when everyone is gearing up for the holiday season.

But there is time enough for everything, if we make the time.

It's not about being patriotic or waving the flag, but about acknowledging an effort made by someone else. And it's not just the veterans who saw combat who deserve our thanks.

The thousands upon thousands of men and women who served in uniform and never fired a shot or dove into a foxhole under fire deserve our thanks, too. They all served countless hours learning and training and essentially standing on guard so the rest of us could watch high school football games on Friday nights and be able to choose between a half-dozen different brands of cola at the corner market and decide not to cut our grass this weekend because there were too many other things to do.

Simply put, their service at lonely military bases across the country or in strange lands overseas or aboard ships in the middle of the ocean was for one thing and one thing only: To preserve freedom for all of us. Even the freedom not to serve ourselves.

But however one feels about the military and the nation's policies, the service of veterans is not something to be scorned or diminished. It was real and they deserve our heartfelt thanks and appreciation.

And it doesn't have to be Veterans Day to stop and thank a vet. Because we enjoy our freedom every day, that means every day is Veterans Day.

aaron.london@news-jrnl.com

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Still I Rise

2009-11-04T14:48:00.001+11:30

You may write me down in history
With your bitter, twisted lies,
You may trod me in the very dirt
But still, like dust, I'll rise.

Does my sassiness upset you?
Why are you beset with gloom?
'Cause I walk like I've got oil wells
Pumping in my living room.

Just like moons and like suns,
With the certainty of tides,
Just like hopes springing high,
Still I'll rise.

Did you want to see me broken?
Bowed head and lowered eyes?
Shoulders falling down like teardrops.
Weakened by my soulful cries.

Does my haughtiness offend you?
Don't you take it awful hard
'Cause I laugh like I've got gold mines
Diggin' in my own back yard.

You may shoot me with your words,
You may cut me with your eyes,
You may kill me with your hatefulness,
But still, like air, I'll rise.

Does my sexiness upset you?
Does it come as a surprise
That I dance like I've got diamonds
At the meeting of my thighs?

Out of the huts of history's shame
I rise
Up from a past that's rooted in pain
I rise
I'm a black ocean, leaping and wide,
Welling and swelling I bear in the tide.
Leaving behind nights of terror and fear
I rise
Into a daybreak that's wondrously clear
I rise
Bringing the gifts that my ancestors gave,
I am the dream and the hope of the slave.
I rise
I rise
I rise.

Maya Angelou

Happy Halloween

2009-10-31T13:20:00.001+11:30

I was hard pressed to find a vintage card sans black cat. I'm partial to them so I won't use them as halloween props. RD

Afterthoughts

2009-10-25T01:50:00.002+11:30

Looking back upon our decision to move to the Eastern Shore led me to re-read "Patricia Cornwell's Unnatural Exposure". Whatever was I thinking way back then in 1997?

The author got the essence of the location down to a tea. That location was Tangier Island, Virginia. Never heard of it? I'm not surprised. What they speak there is a 'fossilized or remnant of 17th century English'.

Let me tell you this is nigh on to impossible to understand.Bob had clients from this remote place and I went with him on a very few occasions. I am the worst at deciphering dialects or accents. I don't know why but I have always had difficulty understanding so I do alot of smiling and nodding.

Now, back when I thought this was quaint or cute. This is where I wanted to live. The other plus was that Ms. Cromwell spoke about cat food factories dotting the shoreline on the mainland. I had cats, perhaps too many cats and I needed some financial relief....so the factories must have an outlet of sorts. These by the way, were fiction. It sounded good and plausible fish, fishing, canning why not?

Now I come to the real crux of my story....many of the folks from Tangier migrated to the big cities of the Eastern Shore of Virginia and Maryland. And they brought their language with them. It seems natural that they moved to places like the Eastern Shore where they had easy access to Tangier by ferry. This ferry runs all summer bringing tourists to and from the island and by request in winter or more likely very seldom.

The inhabitants of Tangier must purchase everything on the mainland. That usually involves a trip to Chrisfield or better yet Salisbury. Same goes for doctors, hospitals you name it...they must travel by plane or ferry. I'm sorry, but this would get very old, very fast.

Now I've given you the background of the strange speech patterns of this area. Bob usually interprets for me ,whispering the question asked of me in my ear. I am catching on but I'll admit our heating and cooling man cannot be understood by me. So although he understands me he chooses not to talk to women, so that pleases both of us.

My daughter is ocassionaly asked to do some clerical or computer work for a friend, which she gladly does. However, this time it comprises fourteen hours of tapes to be transcribed. She has done this many times before....but not by a fossilized 17 century English speaking man.

This is a real conundrum....I've rarely seen her weep but this is so foreign to her she is stumped. I guess all that she can do is make this a family affair....where Bob interprets for her as she types this up. Another day on the farm.

Keep safe,my friends, its rough out there. RD

A word for Thursday

2009-10-23T05:15:00.002+11:30

Main Entry: es·trange
Pronunciation: \i-ˈstrānj\
Function: transitive verb
Inflected Form(s): es·tranged; es·trang·ing
Etymology: Middle English, from Anglo-French estrangir, estranger, from Medieval Latin extraneare, from Latin extraneus strange — more at strange
Date: 15th century

1 : to remove from customary environment or associations
2 : to arouse especially mutual enmity or indifference in where there had formerly been love, affection, or friendliness : alienate

— es·trange·ment \-mənt\ noun

— es·trang·er noun
synonyms estrange, alienate, disaffect mean to cause one to break a bond of affection or loyalty. estrange implies the development of indifference or hostility with consequent separation or divorcement . alienate may or may not suggest separation but always implies loss of affection or interest . disaffect refers especially to those from whom loyalty is expected and stresses the effects (as rebellion or discontent) of alienation without actual separation

This word did not come to mind out of the blue. My daughter, who has been 'estranged' from us for the past six years has suddenly emerged out of the ashes.

I've been taken aback, I am confused. To treat this estrangement as though it was a small matter occurring last week has left me gobsmacked. RD

Got Mail?

2009-10-19T06:00:00.002+11:30

Bob celebrated his birthday this past week. He, my dad and Columbus always celebrate together. So, if there are well wishes sent through the post office they always receive them before the date or more likely after. But this year there was only one card in the mailbox. And this was from some business aquaintance who was promoting their October specials.

I'd like to address the problem of letter writing, post cards and other cards sent, just because. When is the last time you received a handwritten heartfelt letter? Mine was at least four years ago. And I do not remember if I sent a reply or not.

Back to Bob's birthday...he got scads of email, ecard type aknowledgements. Does that make up for a real letter or card? I don't think so...yet I do this myself. For convenience, or timeliness? Laziness?

I used to send cards to my whole family. I had the dates written on my calendar days before so I could go out choose an appropriate message and drop it in the mailbox or go to the postal office. No longer on my things to do list. But why?

Let's face it, many of my recipients have passed on. Their children, who are my age, don't send cards. Heck, they don't even send an email. As families decline, so do things that were formerly just plain etiquette.

I always loved walking to the mailbox and receiving a letter or card. Didn't you? Gosh, someone was thinking about me while they were traveling or just sending a note that I was on their mind. It made my day.

The fact remains that an entire industry may well be going by the wayside, or has been eliminated altogether. We chose our statioinery with care, just the right weight of paper and just how to position those all important initials. Of course the paper was vanilla with perhaps a daring dark blue border. I loved going to the stationary shop and leafing through those huge three ring binder books.

Call me old fashioned or just call me old I miss this stuff. Shall we start a letter writing campaign? A post card a month? I think that this is entirely too late to dig up something from the past that by consensus has fallen by the wayside. I just may write a post card or two to myself...reminding me to do some odd job or recollecting some thought. What do you think?

Hope your week is sunny and bright. Watch out for those hunters. RD

The Darkling Thrush.....Thomas Hardy

2009-10-15T02:26:00.000+11:30

The Darkling Thrush

I leant upon a coppice gate
When Frost was spectre-gray,
And Winter's dregs made desolate
The weakening eye of day.
The tangled bine-stems scored the sky
Like strings of broken lyres,
And all mankind that haunted nigh
Had sought their household fires.

The land's sharp features seemed to be
The Century's corpse outleant,
His crypt the cloudy canopy,
The wind his death-lament.
The ancient pulse of germ and birth
Was shrunken hard and dry,
And every spirit upon earth
Seemed fervourless as I.

At once a voice arose among
The bleak twigs overhead
In a full-hearted evensong
Of joy illimited;
An aged thrush, frail, gaunt, and small,
In blast-beruffled plume,
Had chosen thus to fling his soul
Upon the growing gloom.

So little cause for carolings
Of such ecstatic sound
Was written on terrestrial things
Afar or nigh around,
That I could think there trembled through
His happy good-night air
Some blessed Hope, whereof he knew
And I was unaware.

-- Thomas Hardy

You Rest......You Rust

2009-10-12T07:48:00.002+11:30

That appears to be the mantra of the osteo arthritis bunch. Of which I am a member. But as I was thinking about it...doesn't that apply to anything? Your mind....use it or lose it. Same premisis in my book of 'isms'. All I am saying it is nothing new. However, it may just be a new treatment for those of us with arthritis.

As I was paging through my animal catalogs I was pleasantly surprised....they have more choices for dogs and cats suffering from this debilitating disease than they do for humans. Should I send for those and hope I get a moment's relief?

I've been active my whole life. Not one to sit down for very long. We have become so disillusioned with tv programming that we just stopped ordering up the cabel offerings, bty that is all we get, we don't have local programming. So I'm not sitting in front of the television set. I still try to keep to my daily routines...with all of these animals what choice do I have?

But I must say....it hurts to move. Sure, some days are worse than others, but there you go...how can you plan ahead? The affected joints move around as well, some days I can't type, others my knees won't allow me to climb the stairs. Take today, for instance, my wrists and thumbs simply scream for some relief.

I have been to five or more physicians in the past ten years and it wasn't until I screamed loud enough that my hip was replaced. By then it was too late to do anything but. I'm not sorry I had this procedure done, I just wish it had been three years earlier and saved me the aggravation and discomfort. Now it is quite evident to me that my knees are in trouble. I'm frustrated because I know from extensive reading on the internet that there are remedies for this condition.

I have mentioned this to two of my physicians and they go on, once again, as though I hadn't said one word. So now I am forced once again to look for someone who willingly takes a proactive position. This is always a royal pain. We have no listed Rheumatoligists...not anywhere in the vicinity of 200 miles.

Now I must tell you I function well, almost pain free, with propoxy. These were prescribed for my daughter, and when I need one she offers. I asked for this medication and the physician got totally out of control because I took something that was not prescribed by her. Actually, it was prescribed by the surgeon I had last year and even more potent meds later on and folks , they work.

I am moving around as best as I can, I exercise by walking my dogs. We have discovered that they enjoy beach walks and that is in my daily plan. I own an exercycle and will resume that when it gets a bit cooler outdoors. But please tell me that I don't have to do all of this without the aid of a pain reliever.

I'm currently looking up every imaginable alternative med that I can. I stay abreast of what's new, what works, and positive feedback if there is any. I'm trying to learn about my disease and finding no help from the medical community at all. They would rather treat a hang nail than what is clearly a problem.

I'll tell you quite honestly....when you hurt from head to toe exercise is not the first thing that springs to mind. How about just making it through the day? Goodness knows....I know there are millions of people suffering with far worse conditions and with far worse prognosis. That does not mean that I should come first , last or inbetween...but there are things out there to make a person's life bearable and productive and they are not forthcoming.

Its harvesting season....they are currently doing all the land around our house...what a dusty business. I'm forced to remain indoors while this is going on. After all it is the 'deadly' soy product. Could be just another Virginia tall tale...who knows, but may as well be safe than sorry. Hope your week is brilliant. RD

The Door.....taken from Clive James.com

2009-10-07T12:07:00.000+11:30

The Door

One day you’ll see:
you’ve been knocking on a door
without a house.
You’ve been waiting, shivering, yelling
words of daring and hope.

One day you’ll see:
there is no-one on the other side
except, as ever, the jubilant ocean
that won’t shatter ceramically like a dream
when you and I shatter.

But not yet. Now
you wait outside, watching
the blue arches of mornings
that will break
but are now perfect.

Underneath on tip-toe
pass the faces, speaking to you,
saying ‘you’, ‘you’, ‘you’,
smiling, waving, arriving
in unfailing chronology.

One day you’ll doubt your movements,
you will shudder
at the accuracy of your sudden age.
You will ache for slow beauty
to save you from your quick, quick life.

But not yet. Hope
fills the yawn of time.
Blue surrounds you. Now let’s say
you see a door and knock,
and wait for someone to hear.

What the Shore really needs

2009-09-29T13:40:00.002+11:30

I have been thinking about this blog for sometime. I didn't want it to reflect my personal unhappiness at what is missing, I wanted it to reflect what the population thinks is missing.

Then to my wonder and amazement....an article appeared in our twice weekly newspaper 'Needed Businesses'. Wow, I was ready to be shocked, instead I was pleasantly surprised that the people who responded to this query actually came up with quite reasonable responses.

First and foremost the incident that brought this about was the initial groundbreaking of the one and only Walmart. This troubling event was ten years in the making, so you can see just how ornery these locals can be..well, the supervisors mainly. They have fought all building and commerce from the year one. It is truly a good old boy system that I'm shocked anything of this magnitude got accepted.

But back to my original subject...the people here want diversity in grocery shopping. And no bones about it the people want a gourmet variety deli, that includes imported cheeses, ready-made to go dinners, more than is currently offered like the over-spun rotisserie chickens.

They wanted movie theaters . A movie plex would be nice. We currently have two or three that are open for business at odd hours and don't advertise their showings and when they do....it has to be something that has been available on Netflix for ages.

How to attract tourists? How about a boat rental place? How about gambling ..as in a Mississippi River Boat? How about OTB...that might bring in people who might stay longer than a half hour.

We have oodles of land that is available along the one highway thru the penninsula. What about a shopping mall, Outlet Stores, a Lowes, a new car dealership.

The people that live here want to be able to chose a fast food place, they offered up Popeye,Arby's , Chili's. We currently have Mc D's, Wendy's and Bo Jangles.

The kids have always been a concern of mine. They have no outlets for sports, video, ping pong,big screen TV's, meeting places for events that could include families. We do have a YMCA. Not the same is it.

They asked for an Urgent Care facility. Not a bad idea. You either have the local hospital,ugh, or a hundred mile trip to Salisbury.

All of these businesses would offer the much needed jobs for this area. Right now you can work in a auto parts place which there are many of, or you can work in the chicken industry. That's about it.

My point in mentioning this at all is to let my readers know that there are places in the United States that are currently doing without the basics. Yes, you can be terribly disappointed in some of the results of progress, then change them.

But to hold on to a way of life that has long passed and is irritatingly insufferable for those of us that live here now is incompetent. I am personally indignant each time I must drive one hundred miles for the slightest thing. Don't these supervisors realize that we are forced to shop in another state, and they are losing revenue as well?

What are your thoughts? Go with the flow? or stay put in another century. Have a beautiful week, it looks to be a nice one here. RD

All That's Old is New Again

2009-09-26T05:02:00.002+11:30

I must say....that is a horrible thought. It screams ... no original thought is happening. To rework something that has come and gone should be left buried...we are literally exhuming stuff that was awful once, and now we are looking at those things with a different eye?

Think about it, they have chosen to revisit the 1980's. I don't know about you...but Joan Collins comes to mind. Lots of makeup, those wonderful smoky eyes, bright red lipstick, racing stripes for cheek color, and those shoulder pads!

I'm also recalling the movies and music of the time. Our favorite bands... really, I liked this stuff. The movie buff will do far better than I but all that comes to mind is "Big" with Tom Hanks. And who could forget the "Gremlins" movie? Kinda light and airy and pure entertainment for the prepubescent crowd. Simpler by a long shot.

I lived in Phoenix then. I liked the 1980's. Not a house on the block could be found without a Nagel predominantly displayed. All that lacquer furniture. White and black reigned at the top of the pile. And as I sit here I couldn't forget the many glass items, tables, lamps, whatever went with black and white and a touch of pink.

Talk about a love affair with pink! Wow, "Pretty in Pink", Barbie pink and neon pink dresses by designers like Marc Jacobs and Michael Kors. This is not to say that I was or am a slave to trends..."NO"...it is far too expensive a hobby to embrace for myself. But remember I had two daughters...who wouldn't be caught dead without the proper accouterments to an evening out on the town or at a concert.

I could have literally been living with Madonna's twins at that time. Not all bad. I must say it really became a time of resourcefulness. They scoured the consignment stores, thrift shops, Goodwill and came up with some terrific costumes. (and that is what they were)

Well folks, this might be in your future. Leather, fur, gloves, (yes, gloves),strapless feminine dresses, ruffles, off shoulder dresses and tops, ( oh, how I despised those)how about the less irritating look of the mono-chromatic look. And most of all the bold placing of colors like red and orange together and having it look good?

This has been touched on in several blogs that I read. However, the real eye-opener came when my doc asked about my meds. Oh, I see you are on theophyllien back to the old meds I see. However he qualified his statement by saying "maybe they will get it right this time" "you know a lot of people died while trying to use this stuff back in the 60's. I too hope they have it right this time.

Having had my say on this subject I came to the conclusion that if you really are into being in style....once again....go to a thrift store, a consignment shop, or Good will...You'll be the bell of the ball.

Can it be? The weekend is upon us....Drive safely. RD

Senior Pets, Senior Owners.....A solution I am in favor of.

2009-09-18T05:19:00.000+11:30

Programs support senior pets, senior clients Send us feedback about this article

September 16, 2009
By: Edie Lau
For The VIN News Service

After having to euthanize another elderly animal and hearing yet another owner say she was too old to get a new dog, Dr. Raymond J. Ramirez got to thinking.

How, he wondered, could he help good clients ease past their fears that their pets might outlive them and have no place to go?

From this question was born “Love and Life Goes On,” a new service at Lakeview Veterinary Clinic in East Peoria, Ill., through which owners need not worry what will happen to their animal companions should they die or become too infirm to tend to their needs.

“What we say is that we’ll take care of your dog or cat for you if there comes a point where you can’t take care of them any more. No questions asked,” said Ramirez.

It’s a huge commitment, but Ramirez sees it as a way to help his elderly clients responsibly continue enjoying pet companionship. It is also smart business. The clinic he bought a year and a half ago is located in a region with an older population. “If my practice is to remain a good, viable practice,” he reasoned, “I need to figure out ways to keep my existing good clients or attract new ones.”

The question of how best to support senior pet owners and their pets is a familiar one for many practitioners and rife with ethical land mines. In an online discussion on the Veterinary Support Personnel Network (VSPN), a division of the Veterinary Information Network (VIN), technicians spoke of their clinics being asked to euthanize healthy pets when their owners were no longer able to care for them, or when the owner died. Some techs said their clinics’ policy was not to euthanize healthy animals; others felt an obligation to honor an owner’s wishes.

2nd Chance 4 Pets, a non-profit animal-care advocacy organization in California, estimates that half a million pets are euthanized in the United States each year because their owners neglected to plan properly for the animals’ ongoing care. The organization is dedicated to educating pet owners on how to provide for their pets during the animals’ lifetime.

Amy Shever, who founded the all-volunteer organization in 2004 and serves as its director, said she is against euthanizing healthy animals just because their owners have died or become disabled. “I think it’s unethical, and I think it’s ignorant,” she said, arguing that someone else out there could be an equally capable and loving owner.

The issue is relevant for all pet owners, not just seniors. Shever was motivated to establish 2nd Chance 4 Pets after the deadly World Trade Center attacks of Sept. 11, 2001. “Eight hundred animals in New York City were left behind,” Shever said. “The average age of the owners was in their 30s.

“This is something that every responsible pet owner needs to think about,” she realized. “We don’t know how our destiny will play out.”

2nd Chance 4 Pets urges pet owners to, at the very least, get an agreement from someone — be it a family member, a friend, a pet-sitter, or a fellow pet owner from the local dog park — to take care of their pet or pets if something should happen.

That agreement is something that should be discussed and renewed periodically, “because people’s lives change,” Shever said. Someone who agreed 10 years ago to take your pooch might be unable to honor that commitment today.

More formal arrangements are another option. According to 2nd Chance 4 Pets, a growing number of states permit residents, as part of their estate planning, to establish trust funds for pet care.

Shever noted that some veterinary schools also offer “perpetual pet care” programs that provide for the lifelong needs of pets whose owners have died or become disabled. These programs tend to be expensive, requiring payments by the owners on the order of $25,000 or $30,000.

At Lakeview Veterinary Clinic, the security owner Ramirez is offering his clients is, in some respects, institutionalizing what’s been a long-time practice at many veterinary hospitals.

Mary Jean Calvi, a licensed veterinary technician in upstate New York with 12 years in the profession, has acquired a menagerie through clients who couldn’t keep their pets any longer. Specifically: four dogs, six cats, eight birds, four rabbits and a tortoise.

The most recent acquisition is a ring-necked dove that belonged to an elderly client who needed medical treatment but delayed because of her many animal charges.

“(She) refused to enter the hospital because she was concerned for the future of her pets,” Calvi wrote on the VSPN discussion board. “She knew that many of them were difficult to place because of who they were: a pit bull, several older dogs, a diabetic, older cat, a crow, a dove .... The entire staff stepped in and we each took in one of them so the client would allow them to admit her to the hospital. She died a few days later and most of the animals are STILL with the people who offered to take them in. I got the dove.”

Added Calvi in an interview, “Anyone who’s ever worked in an animal hospital knows, you inevitably bring home an animal. It’s an unspoken law.”

Besides providing for the lifetime needs of pets, one aim of Ramirez’s plan is to provide his clients with continued animal companionship. Talking with directors of retirement housing in his community, Ramirez heard of instances in which pets apparently prolonged their owners’ lives.

“They saw that if someone came in with a pet, that it was pretty quickly after the pet passed away that the person (also) passed away,” Ramirez said. “They didn’t have anything to live for. You need something to look forward to every day.”

Jennifer Witzel, a licensed veterinary technician in Marshfield, Wisc., has witnessed the power of pet companionship in her own family. Her husband’s grandmother, at age 80, adopted a “poodley mix guy” from the local humane society. The grandmother is subject to bouts of depression and has told her family that needing to feed the dog and take him out gives her a reason to get up every day.

“She’s said many times that (without him), she would have thrown in the towel long before,” Witzel said. Her husband’s grandmother is now 97.

But some adoption agencies decline to work with elderly would-be pet owners, out of concern for the animals’ long-term welfare. In Washington state, Kelly Nelson, owner and founder of a pet-adoption and foster-care organization called Kindred Souls Foundation, remembers being contacted by a woman who was trying to find a pair of cats for her mother. “She was having trouble finding an organization to adopt to her because she’s 80,” Nelson said.

That got Nelson thinking about impediments to pet ownership for seniors and ways to overcome them. From that thinking arose Senior Companion Program, which matches people aged 62 and older with cats or dogs age 10 and older. Kindred Souls pays for the food, cat litter and medical services for each animal for the rest of the animal’s life. Each animal/caregiver pair is assigned a volunteer case manager who takes care of delivering food and litter to the home and can provide transportation to veterinary appointments.

The new program, initially supported by a budget of $10,000 for up to 10 animals, has so far matched a handful of senior cats with senior caregivers. Nelson said much of the work Kindred Souls does is possible because of its relationship with Chambers Creek Veterinary Hospital in Lakewood, Wash., which provides the foundation with free and discounted medical services.

“That’s our pro bono; that’s our cause,” said Dr. Ann Marie Thiessen, who serves as Kindred Souls Foundation’s medical director. “We feel so privileged to be able to help in whatever way we can.”

Noting that many adoptive owners continue to bring the animals to Chambers Creek for care at their regular prices, Thiessen said, “It’s a symbiotic relationship, as well.”

Back at Lakeview Veterinary Clinic, Ramirez said he doesn’t anticipate being overwhelmed with the pets of clients who turn them over to him. The program is so new that no client has yet taken up the offer.

The subject of death, whether a pet’s or a person’s, is obviously touchy. Ramirez has found that those clients whose pets have already died and who have decided that that pet will be the last are perhaps the least receptive to the invitation.

“If they’ve gone down the path and made the decision, I think us coming in with that suggestion is not likely to change their mind,” Ramirez said. “They’ve mentally made it so it’s not fun anymore, as a defense mechanism.”

But for clients whose pets are still doing well, the idea seems to be gaining traction. Ramirez said he will continue to tweak his approach until it works

First Anniversary

2009-09-10T11:38:00.002+11:30

Today is the first anniversary of my hip replacement. I cannot begin to tell you how very grateful I am.

To think....that I once gave the notion of continuing to suffer in endless pain rather than surgery. Upon reflection I see just how ludicrous that thought is.

Fearfulness is something that needs to be put to rest by each an every one of us in our own way. I chose something that was something like an out of body experience.

It wasn't until I had recently visited the hospital on my third trip that I realized that is where the surgery took place. I couldn't tell you anything about the experience. Which is probably a good thing. If you are a surgical nurse I'm sure you hear this often.

All I can say is that if this hip replacement is in your future go ahead. I've never felt better about a decision in my life. Don't wait, as I did, making one excuse after another, the result can be hazardous to your health.

It's raining, it's raining....fall is here. Play nice. RD

Fall is upon us......like it or not.

2009-09-06T13:03:00.002+11:30

I'm not particularly a fan of fall, I'm a winter gal myself and do welcome the change in seasons. The cooler nights do help. This is a wonderful time to be out and about. I say this with tongue in cheek.

Why....? Fall allergies. Goodness, I have never in my life experienced these types of allergies. It is a cycle that I believe can only be broken with a frost. Sneezing, itching, runny eyes and nose and on and on. But of course, there are remedies....over the counter put you to sleep remedies. Then of course there is my dog Gemma, who is licking, itching and carrying on as I do. She too gets the over the counter remedies and she sleeps for an hour or so and is right back at it.

We both are awaiting a bit of cooling off. Whatever the culprit is is really in good form this year. I'm thinking mold. It is just everywhere. You breath it in day and nite. A dog is closer to the ground and they have their noses right in it.

Come to think of it....I spent Thursday eight hours of Thursday on the road and in Salisbury's Peninsula Regional Hospital getting tested. Oh yeah, the same old stuff, chest x-ray, spirometery, and finally a consult with a pulmonologist.

I have to say....this fellow was one wippy guy. The second that I have met in the ten years of living here. He was sassy, feisty,knowledgeable, not that difficult to look at either. Yup, I have allergies, yup, I have asthma. We already knew this, but it is getting worse. He suggested I move. MOVE....heck I've wanted to do that for the past ten years. He offered to write a note to Bob to stress the urgency of my getting out of this climate. He suggested Northern Arizona. Funny he should say that.

As anyone who knows me just a bit will tell you I have been looking in various places among them Texas. He nixed Texas. Too much of the same types of allergens that I'm sensitive to there. Why northern Arizona...I really don't know...but he mentioned that I clearly don't belong here or back in the 18Th century of the Eastern Shore of Virginia.

I explained why we have no choice in the matter at this time because of the sorry state of real estate both on the Eastern Shore and many other places. He then suggested .. failing that we must modernize our home by installing central air, some kind of heating, not the oil we have now. Now come on....spend thousands to stay where it is unhealthy and dismal?

I am rather happy about the results.....it could have been so much worse. But he did mention that the dizziness is not lung related....it is in my head. Oh no, that means more tests.

I've got to tell you....I went on line, (when I could) and found some really nice digs in Prescott Arizona. I'm pumped up again and looking at the world a little differently.

My friend suggested I look into Environmental Diseases. I did so and I am suggesting that everyone take a look. It is amazing what this site can come up with so many symptoms that are environmentally induced. I've often complained about driving behind these huge live poultry trucks.....well there you go....so many viruses are dispersed into your space it is no wonder I walk into walls. But....the red herring is...just trying to find a doctor who agrees with these theories may take awhile. Enlightenment is not that easy to find.

I'm pleased to say Nicci's foot surgery went well and she is a hard one to keep down. Thankfully, the pain relief she was prescribed also knock her out for several hours. Yea!!!!

My journaling is going to be sporadic...we have a problem with our carrier, Vonage. It will be rectified on the 11th of September and we will be back with Verizon. Hopefully that will be the end of this fading in and out. Was it so unreasonable of me to think that it was the signal? Like a satelite shifting and we are losing power down here? Bob seems to think I've lost my mind. Well, just once he could be right.

This is a holiday weekend. Be Safe. See you soon. RD

Getting to the bottom of these health issues

2009-08-27T02:26:00.002+11:30

Here I am once again talking about my ongoing health issues. I really hope I'm not boring you silly but who else to run this by but you?

Yesterday was my appointment with the pulmonology department in Salisbury having a spirometry test and another chest x-ray. I've mentioned it before, but to refresh your memory, it is a ninety minute drive. Which by all standards is quite doable, but not when the temps are ranging in the ninety five degree mark and so so airconditioining.

Now I have had these tests before, I've had asthma all of my life. It is usually under control with meds. Only when I get a stubborn virus is it a bother. So I was not particularly anxious about the test.

We got to our destination....second floor of the brand spanking new building. I gotta tell you they have been on such a building spurt that the hospital is unrecognizable from what it was ten years ago.

I was met at the elevator by the tech and walked to her office. The testing takes place in like an acrylic phone booth....with all sorts of breathing gadgets right in front of you.

It is a little step up and backed into the chair. Holy cow....what just happened? Pain shooting from my back, down my leg , down my arm and seemingly getting stuck in my rib cage. Did lightening strike? Is this a heart attack? Was I shot? All in a matter of a nano-second ran through my mind.

None of the above....it was a sciatic event. The tech was able to have me walk it out somewhat, I mean it still was persistent in my rib cage. I told her I needed a moment to collect myself...she insisted I go home. Her tests lasted an hour and my time would be better spent on the drive home. I reluctantly agreed.

Thank goodness Nicci was driving and she always comes prepared with extra meds. I took a pain pill with a Latte and off we went. I was fine, really. Just glad that it was over. What a surprising thing to have happen....just making a stupid little turn and BANG you are in a world of pain.

Today every nook and cranny of the right side of my body is aching. Not an unusual aftermath. But just think about it...this could happen at any time to anyone, anywhere. No warning just pop.

Thought I'd pass this along to give you a heads up on this type of event. By the way...it is looking more and more like the dizziness episodes and lack of oxygen are due to anxiety. Go figure....Just what in the world am I so anxious about?

Be safe, keep cool and have a splendid day. RD

How to Stay Young

2009-08-22T05:40:00.003+11:30

HOW TO STAY YOUNG by George Carlin

1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes
age, weight and
height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is why
you pay "them "
2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.
3. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts,
gardening,whatever. Never let the brain idle. "An idle
mind is the
devil's workshop." And the devil's name is Alzheimer's.
4. Enjoy the simple things.
5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you
gasp for breath.
6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on.
The only
person, who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be
ALIVE while
you are alive.
7. Surround yourself with what you love, whether
it's family,
pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies,
whatever. Your
home is your refuge.
8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve
it. If it is
unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can
improve, get help.
9 Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the
mall, even to the
Next county; to a foreign country but NOT to where the guilt is.
10. Tell the people you love that you love them, at every
opportunity.
AND ALWAYS REMEMBER:
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we
take, but by
The moments that take our breath away.

These simple steps may save your life. The only other suggestion I might offer is to think about aging long before it happens.

This is without a doubt a ageist society. Just watch your television programs for awhile....they have seemingly 12 year old defending a vicious criminal, or a story line that includes a prepubescent doctor. Now for the aged and aging all I ever saw were hemorrhoid commercials, denture adhesives, and diapers.

This is how we are portrayed to the up and coming generation. Need I explain further? Not the epitome of the joke....a youngster speaking with a senior citizen on the value of learning new technologies, keeping up with the space race...when the senior citizen finally got a word in....he mentioned the fact that it is our generation who invented these new technologies. What is that generation going to contribute?

Quite honestly, I never ever thought of growing old. Not the horror of it, nor the "gone fishen" side...just never gave it a thought. We watch as our parents age....I always saw my mother and dad as young and vibrant. They didn't age, they had a few health issues and one day they were gone.

Now why wasn't I paying attention at the time? I had a life, I was busy, I was working. Was I different than most, should I have been paying closer attention and planning for my future? Who knows, in any event I didn't see the handwriting on the wall and went about my selfish life.

One day about three years ago I awoke to such pain in my leg and hip I thought that I had tossed and turned once too often and broken something. Later that day, while painting the kitchen I turned on the ladder and wow....that was a sensation not soon forgotten.

The rest is history. I've got a new hip, no pain there. I would suggest this be done to anyone suffering with OA. But......the side effect....I was aging. This is an old people's disease, I must be unique...ready for Ripley's Believe it or Not. I was still in denial. I wasn't planning on my future being anything but what it once was.

The influx of mail sent to me from Social Security must be a mistake. They are way too early. I don't want to understand this stuff so I'll just put it in a folder for a rainy day.

Body parts heading 'south'. I've been active all of my life....I never considered health clubs, excercycles, walking machines. I did it all routinely. I walked the dogs on long healthy walks, I climbed our steep stairs multiple times a day and we ate a healthy well balanced diet. Let me tell you youngsters that's not enough.

One day things just wear out. Like my most recent appliance strike....coffee maker Kaput. You either replace it or do it the old fashioned way. Same story for your body. Let's not forget about genes....you saw your parents...how did they age. You can be a carbon copy.

In conclusion, don't leave by thinking I've got this all worked out. Far from it. I'm just coming to grips with it. I'm really doing you a favor....start planning now! Have a wonderful weekend. RD

The Philadelphia Eagles sponsers

2009-08-20T04:20:00.000+11:30

The Philadelphia Eagles website lists these companies as corporate sponsors, but the images aren’t clickable, so I’ve looked up as much contact info as I could find.

7-Eleven
Twitter
Facebook

94WYSP
Twitter
Facebook

AAA (American Automobile Association)
Take a close look at Heather Hunter’s bio. She’s worked on behalf of rescues, so she might be worth contacting.

ACME

Aflac
Twitter
Facebook

BestBuy
Twitter
Facebook

Budweiser
Facebook

Chrysler & Jeep

CJ’s Tire

Comcast
Twitter

Comcast Sports Net Philadelphia
Twitter

Dietz & Watson
Twitter

Dunkin Donuts
Twitter
Facebook

Gatorade
Twitter
Facebook

Geico
Facebook

Heineken

Idearc
Facebook

Independence Blue Cross

Jefferson University Hospitals

Kentucky Fried Chicken
Facebook

Lincoln Financial Group

MasterCard
Twitter

Miller Lite
Twitter

Motorola
Twitter
Facebook

NovaCare
Corporate Office: 888-735-6332

Papa John’s
Twitter
Facebook
They donate to the Louisville Zoo, so I assume at least someone there likes animals. They need to be consistent and not support a team that contradicts their previous donations to animal welfare.

Pennsylvania Lottery

Pepcid

Pepsi
Twitter
Facebook

Philly.com
Twitter (see their website for more Twitter accounts)
Facebook

RE/MAX
Twitter

Rite Aid

SCA

Snapple
Twitter
Facebook

Sovereign Bank

Splenda
Facebook (inactive)

Taco Bell
Twitter
Facebook

Tastycake

TEVA Pharmaceuticals

Ticket Exchange by Ticketmaster
teamexchange@ticketmaster.com

USAirways
Corporate Headquarters: 480-693-0800

Verizon
Facebook

Waste Management

No Time Like the Present

2009-08-19T08:05:00.002+11:30

That used to be my motto. Getting things done did not need to be thought about but done as quickly as possible and on to the next. Not so anymore. Oh, I'll admit there are multitudes of things that need doing but I realized that I can't do them. Well, not all of them.

We are getting there....slow but sure. That could very well be my motto now. I work slowly and then that may be too much. The frustrations are building up and have nowhere to go. I can't pick up the phone and talk to a nearby pal. My support system now comprises my daughter and husband. And they each have issues themselves so cannot begin to understand what is going on.

I don't know what is going on. The doctors do not know what is going on. When do you call it quits and throw your arms up in the air and say 'uncle'.Alright, I'm giving it just one more shot. I've been referred to a pulmonologist. That will take place several weeks from now. I also have more blood tests to fulfil...geez, the blue marks are just fading from the last time.

Have you ever been on an amusement ride and in the middle of it wanted to get off? No way you can stop get off collect yourself and go on to the next ride. That is very much what I'm experiencing. It all starts with the dizziness. Out of the blue mind you....then it moves on to short of breath.

You feel like you can barely make it to your room or some other safe place to sit or lie down. You grab at anything that is available to you to keep from falling. Your arms are outstretched and you take on the Frankenstein shuffle. You finally park yourself somewhere, hopefully near your medication.

These episodes can sneak up on you in another manner.....I'm told I will be late, or why isn't dinner ready, some such nonsense which you would normally have roll off your back and tell them to JUST WAIT. Not so...you are not unlike a fainting goat. You want to drop then and there....I have not fallen on my back with all four limbs in the air, that may be next.

So far the doc has given me a new asthma med, a breathing machine, and oxygen. If you think about it it does have merit...somehow blood pressure plummets, you feel faint or dizzy and the oxygen should revive you to continue what ever you've been doing.

Now I look the same. Nothing has changed. My balance is impaired and that is what you can see, but I cannot take a chance on wandering too far from my stash of meds so I have become housebound. This, to me, is almost intolerable, but that is the state of things at this moment.

We are expecting a house appraiser any time within the next few weeks. So in addition to cleaning in spurts and fits to accommodate this fellow. I'm having to put things away that I love to work on between chores and flopping around . This is maddening.

My daughter's surgery was approaching at a fast pace. After three years of pain and agony of walking on a lump in her arch, and being seen by several doctors one of whom said it was nothing to worry about, Fri was the cut out date. She went in for pre-op work up yesterday and was told she had a hernia and they could not operate.

The surgical scheduling is quite a challenge for these doctors. From the main hospital Peninsula Regional, a specialty surgical place to now McReady Hospital in Chrisfield Md. She has been shuffled around and is getting the tumor removed on the 28th. I'm wondering.....everything is being done with such haste after sitting on this for three years.

This is just the normal day to day life on the farm. Nothing special, but each item taken by itself is either troubling, or time consuming beyond belief. I'm far from throwing the towel in over these matters I just don't want to wait weeks and weeks for results. I am learning patience in my old age and that is a good thing. Be Safe. RD

Dog Houses Have Come a Long Way | 6 Outrageous Doghouses | Photos | This Old House

2009-08-13T14:06:00.001+11:30

Dog Houses Have Come a Long Way | 6 Outrageous Doghouses | Photos | This Old House

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Modern Love

2009-08-08T14:17:00.002+11:30

Those Aren’t Fighting Words, Dear

Article Tools Sponsored By
By LAURA A. MUNSON
Published: July 31, 2009

LET’S say you have what you believe to be a healthy marriage. You’re still friends and lovers after spending more than half of your lives together. The dreams you set out to achieve in your 20s — gazing into each other’s eyes in candlelit city bistros when you were single and skinny — have for the most part come true.

o decades later you have the 20 acres of land, the farmhouse, the children, the dogs and horses. You’re the parents you said you would be, full of love and guidance. You’ve done it all: Disneyland, camping, Hawaii, Mexico, city living, stargazing.

Sure, you have your marital issues, but on the whole you feel so self-satisfied about how things have worked out that you would never, in your wildest nightmares, think you would hear these words from your husband one fine summer day: “I don’t love you anymore. I’m not sure I ever did. I’m moving out. The kids will understand. They’ll want me to be happy.”

But wait. This isn’t the divorce story you think it is. Neither is it a begging-him-to-stay story. It’s a story about hearing your husband say “I don’t love you anymore” and deciding not to believe him. And what can happen as a result.

Here’s a visual: Child throws a temper tantrum. Tries to hit his mother. But the mother doesn’t hit back, lecture or punish. Instead, she ducks. Then she tries to go about her business as if the tantrum isn’t happening. She doesn’t “reward” the tantrum. She simply doesn’t take the tantrum personally because, after all, it’s not about her.

Let me be clear: I’m not saying my husband was throwing a child’s tantrum. No. He was in the grip of something else — a profound and far more troubling meltdown that comes not in childhood but in midlife, when we perceive that our personal trajectory is no longer arcing reliably upward as it once did. But I decided to respond the same way I’d responded to my children’s tantrums. And I kept responding to it that way. For four months.

“I don’t love you anymore. I’m not sure I ever did.”

His words came at me like a speeding fist, like a sucker punch, yet somehow in that moment I was able to duck. And once I recovered and composed myself, I managed to say, “I don’t buy it.” Because I didn’t.

He drew back in surprise. Apparently he’d expected me to burst into tears, to rage at him, to threaten him with a custody battle. Or beg him to change his mind.

So he turned mean. “I don’t like what you’ve become.”

Gut-wrenching pause. How could he say such a thing? That’s when I really wanted to fight. To rage. To cry. But I didn’t.

Instead, a shroud of calm enveloped me, and I repeated those words: “I don’t buy it.”

You see, I’d recently committed to a non-negotiable understanding with myself. I’d committed to “The End of Suffering.” I’d finally managed to exile the voices in my head that told me my personal happiness was only as good as my outward success, rooted in things that were often outside my control. I’d seen the insanity of that equation and decided to take responsibility for my own happiness. And I mean all of it.

My husband hadn’t yet come to this understanding with himself. He had enjoyed many years of hard work, and its rewards had supported our family of four all along. But his new endeavor hadn’t been going so well, and his ability to be the breadwinner was in rapid decline. He’d been miserable about this, felt useless, was losing himself emotionally and letting himself go physically. And now he wanted out of our marriage; to be done with our family.

But I wasn’t buying it.

I said: “It’s not age-appropriate to expect children to be concerned with their parents’ happiness. Not unless you want to create co-dependents who’ll spend their lives in bad relationships and therapy. There are times in every relationship when the parties involved need a break. What can we do to give you the distance you need, without hurting the family?”

“Huh?” he said.

“Go trekking in Nepal. Build a yurt in the back meadow. Turn the garage studio into a man-cave. Get that drum set you’ve always wanted. Anything but hurting the children and me with a reckless move like the one you’re talking about.”

Then I repeated my line, “What can we do to give you the distance you need, without hurting the family?”

“Huh?”

“How can we have a responsible distance?”

“I don’t want distance,” he said. “I want to move out.”

My mind raced. Was it another woman? Drugs? Unconscionable secrets? But I stopped myself. I would not suffer.

Instead, I went to my desk, Googled “responsible separation” and came up with a list. It included things like: Who’s allowed to use what credit cards? Who are the children allowed to see you with in town? Who’s allowed keys to what?

I looked through the list and passed it on to him.

His response: “Keys? We don’t even have keys to our house.”

I remained stoic. I could see pain in his eyes. Pain I recognized.

“Oh, I see what you’re doing,” he said. “You’re going to make me go into therapy. You’re not going to let me move out. You’re going to use the kids against me.”

“I never said that. I just asked: What can we do to give you the distance you need ... ”

“Stop saying that!”

Well, he didn’t move out.

Instead, he spent the summer being unreliable. He stopped coming home at his usual six o’clock. He would stay out late and not call. He blew off our entire Fourth of July — the parade, the barbecue, the fireworks — to go to someone else’s party. When he was at home, he was distant. He wouldn’t look me in the eye. He didn’t even wish me “Happy Birthday.”

But I didn’t play into it. I walked my line. I told the kids: “Daddy’s having a hard time as adults often do. But we’re a family, no matter what.” I was not going to suffer. And neither were they.

MY trusted friends were irate on my behalf. “How can you just stand by and accept this behavior? Kick him out! Get a lawyer!”

I walked my line with them, too. This man was hurting, yet his problem wasn’t mine to solve. In fact, I needed to get out of his way so he could solve it.

I know what you’re thinking: I’m a pushover. I’m weak and scared and would put up with anything to keep the family together. I’m probably one of those women who would endure physical abuse. But I can assure you, I’m not. I load 1,500-pound horses into trailers and gallop through the high country of Montana all summer. I went through Pitocin-induced natural childbirth. And a Caesarean section without follow-up drugs. I am handy with a chain saw.

I simply had come to understand that I was not at the root of my husband’s problem. He was. If he could turn his problem into a marital fight, he could make it about us. I needed to get out of the way so that wouldn’t happen.

Privately, I decided to give him time. Six months.

I had good days, and I had bad days. On the good days, I took the high road. I ignored his lashing out, his merciless jabs. On bad days, I would fester in the August sun while the kids ran through sprinklers, raging at him in my mind. But I never wavered. Although it may sound ridiculous to say “Don’t take it personally” when your husband tells you he no longer loves you, sometimes that’s exactly what you have to do.

Instead of issuing ultimatums, yelling, crying or begging, I presented him with options. I created a summer of fun for our family and welcomed him to share in it, or not — it was up to him. If he chose not to come along, we would miss him, but we would be just fine, thank you very much. And we were.

And, yeah, you can bet I wanted to sit him down and persuade him to stay. To love me. To fight for what we’ve created. You can bet I wanted to.

But I didn’t.

I barbecued. Made lemonade. Set the table for four. Loved him from afar.

And one day, there he was, home from work early, mowing the lawn. A man doesn’t mow his lawn if he’s going to leave it. Not this man. Then he fixed a door that had been broken for eight years. He made a comment about our front porch needing paint. Our front porch. He mentioned needing wood for next winter. The future. Little by little, he started talking about the future.

It was Thanksgiving dinner that sealed it. My husband bowed his head humbly and said, “I’m thankful for my family.”

He was back.

And I saw what had been missing: pride. He’d lost pride in himself. Maybe that’s what happens when our egos take a hit in midlife and we realize we’re not as young and golden anymore.

When life’s knocked us around. And our childhood myths reveal themselves to be just that. The truth feels like the biggest sucker-punch of them all: it’s not a spouse or land or a job or money that brings us happiness. Those achievements, those relationships, can enhance our happiness, yes, but happiness has to start from within. Relying on any other equation can be lethal.

My husband had become lost in the myth. But he found his way out. We’ve since had the hard conversations. In fact, he encouraged me to write about our ordeal. To help other couples who arrive at this juncture in life. People who feel scared and stuck. Who believe their temporary feelings are permanent. Who see an easy out, and think they can escape.

My husband tried to strike a deal. Blame me for his pain. Unload his feelings of personal disgrace onto me.

But I ducked. And I waited. And it worked.

Laura A. Munson is a writer who lives in Whitefish, Mont.

Having read this article several times today.....first go-around found me wishing I could be this detached and self serving. Second go around I came away with a different opinion....this is fiction.

If this is to be believed they must indeed be a pair matched in heaven. He, being emotionally abusive and she the eternal mother and self sacrificing to the point of carrying on as though daddy has a few issues to work on , so lets go gang and have some fun in the sun.

If he were not bringing home a paycheck through out this little experiment I can guarantee you this would have a different ending. It doesn't mention whether she had a career as well...which would change the complexion of "let's give daddy space".

If this is true....she is a far better person than I am. Where she is expert at ducking I would be walking out the door. No amount of counseling praying, or ignoring the problem will change ..... he became disillusioned. Life was a disappointment although he achieved his goals. It almost parallels the state of being of an actor or person who achieves fame and can't handle it. What's with that?

After reading about this, I came to my conclusions. ...What do you think?

Have a marvelous weekend. Be safe.RD

Its a Brand New Day

2009-08-02T04:51:00.002+11:30

and I'm looking forward to what it will bring. I may have said that too soon. Bob just brought in a huge box of veggies from the Eggman. And a musk melon the size of a basketball, I love melons.

So there is no doubt that I will be making salsa for the next few hours. Nicci isn't here to give a hand so I had better start.

Here is good news.......my gateleg table materialized overnite. I cannot tell you how pleased and delighted I am. Some things just need to be left unsaid....I'm not asking because in all reality I won't get a straight answer. It is a bit worse for wear...table top split in half. It can be mended and that is what I'm here for.

The temperatures on the sidebar do not indicate just how awful it is out there. The air is so heavy you can chew it.

I'm off to the kitchen. I seem to be spending an awful lot of time in there. All good things. Take care. Put on that sun lotion, you never know. RD

There is no reason for

2009-08-01T01:18:00.002+11:30

this story to have ever happened or written about. It is just a crying shame that people like this exist and are free to do what they will.

Remember back when I told you about the sweet gateleg table I found? Yes, it was marked with tape and easily identified as a piece I wanted. Along with a small kitchen cabinet that I will rework, and a smaller wooden cabinet that had the signs of being stripped and I would finish the job.

This is what I do. Lucky for me Bob is in real estate and has been fortunate enough to be a foreclosure specialist. Sometimes the homes are empty and spotless and other times when a death has occurred the family has gone through the belongings and left the remainder for the agent to dispose of.

The gateleg was in one of these houses. As I said it was clearly marked but not permanently marked just masking tape "X", as were the hutch and cabinet. Bob also is responsible for the clean up and has a team of two that have done this for him forever.

We are talking about something that took place in May of this year, not ages ago. James usually brings the items over. He is the team. This time it took a real effort to do this. Always an excuse of one kind or another....none of them held water so the red flags started flying about.

One Friday after countless phone conversations James brought the hutch and cabinet. Ah, excuse me, where is the table? Bob is the only one that chats with James, he has an accent that is unintelligible to me, and I've been knows not to understand these local accents.

I just know a conversation went on maybe something like this.."where's the table James?.... what table? you know the one with the 'X" on it? Oh, yeah, its safe in the barn. But I asked for you to deliver that as well. I didn't have room he replies, looking at the size of the truck you could carry the majority of a household in there. The subject dropped.

I had time to repaint a room that this table was to go into. I had plans ,if you recall, of painting it red. I never let go of the subject, until one day Bob said not to mention it to him ever again. Huh? Its been sold? (this is what James does, he has a 24/7 rummage sale going on).

I have not mentioned it again. But I have thought of nothing else. I have lost respect for Bob, but this is not news. I want something to be done about James. Yesterday I made of photo copy of a gateleg table, just a precaution incase the doberman gang of a police force is at a loss as to what I will be registering a complaint about.

This has taken me so long since 1) we were told early on we do not sue our neighbors.2) I'm not sueing, I want to know the truth of the matter.3)it is such a painfully small community, and I am the outsider I think my charges will fall on deaf ears. 4) this could easily backfire onto Bob...who needs their commerce. As for me....I've said it often enough...I don't give a hoot about these people and a thief should be called out and reprimanded.

Do I have a leg to stand on? Geez, I hope so. But in reality...very unlikely. I'm going down there today. Wish me luck. Keep safe. RD

Am I Seeing Red or....

2009-07-30T04:42:00.002+11:30

is everything coming up roses. Best guess...neither.

My malady, illness, condition has not got a name,although I have been to Salisbury and Pokemoke City numerous times being poked, x-rayed, swallowing my pride,plus drinking stuff I wouldn't toss out of a car window for fear of injuring someone.

Does this mean I'm to live like this...walking into walls, not being able to hold on to a paint brush? Tiring at the slightest movement. Taking naps that rival my cats. I sure hope not....it is becoming 'old' and scary.

Thank goodness for books. They have gotten me through the bulk of this. Oddly enough I can hold a book upright and easily get lost in the written word.

Most recently I have been reading P.D. James and Elizabeth George. Two wonderfully entertaining authors.

I have become fixated upon Cornwall. Last night I went so far as to find estate agents, and browse through the offerings. Nothing dimmed my enthusiasm. I saw the ideal lodgings. This is just my fantasy of course, but it keeps me occupied. Much like finding a man like Tommy Lynley...fiction of the first order.

We are coming to grips with the dog situation. The trainer/behaviorist finally consented to answer my email. (her phone was not listed) She admonished me by stating the obvious....'had you come last year as you intended this may not have happened.' After getting over my initial fit of rage, I decided to email her back and dismiss the obvious and want to continue in the quest to train my two dogs.

This week also found us without transportation...water pump on the car needed replacement. You have no idea what lengths you need to go through to just get a simple referral. Our usual mechanic hemmed and hawed coming up with very little useful information. Alas, Eggman to the rescue. He knows the good the bad and the ugly about these parts.

Car is back, the bill was not as frightful as it could be,and included in the fix yet another referral to an air conditioning shop. It doesn't get much better than that. We just want to make informed decisions...and that has been denied us for the past ten years. I've told you how surley these folks can be.

Now that we have wheels, new appointments being made, and requesting that trainer/behaviorist be included on vet visit, I think I have things covered.

Truthfully.....I would like nothing better than to bite into something sinfully sweet. Is that using food as a reward? I don't care what its called I need chocolate.

Play it safe....RD

2009-07-26T13:02:00.000+11:30

Its Been Awhile

2009-07-24T01:03:00.002+11:30

After finishing my last two projects and gung ho to embark on the third....I came down with what I thought was a temporary condition.

This condition has persisted for the entire month of July. It is vertigo, along with lethargy and malaise. Now it is no picnic getting around the house or anywhere else for that matter. I sometimes opt to sit it out rather than fall flat on my face.

Sure, I've been seen by ,infact, two physicians. One was totally useless and didn't detect the pneumonia I had been carrying around. Then an urgent care visit to my usual doctors office where I was met by someone new again. My doctor was vacationing.

This proved somewhat successful. She found the pneumonia and began treatment. We needed to address that first. Forget for the time being I couldn't navigate from my room to the kitchen. Not totally, I was prescribed antivert, which does help on occasion.

I am being tested for pre diabetis. Just to find my triglycerides are high....just stop eating everything you love and you will be fine. Or it could have been what I ate the night before. So I'm not taking any chances and munching on all the right stuff.

I should have been to the lab again today, but forgot myself and broke my fast. Shame on me or tough. This time it will be for thyroid and chest x-ray.

Now this is all quite new to me...I'm the one that never got sick. If I were laid low temporarily, I recovered with the speed of lightening. I would never devote a whole blog to my physical condition if this were not a rare and unusual occurrence.

It is quite difficult to maintain my sense of humor and lightness that I normally approach life. My lifestyle is being affected and I want it to stop. I will do what is asked of me, but there are limits I need to re-evaluate.

In addition, we have endured a recent shift in doggy hierarchy. This latest movement was not unexpected...between dear Lucie and cranky Gemma. Gemma tries a patience of a saint, Lucie is not a saint and put Gemma in her place not once but three times. Not a little snappy tooth event .... but the real McCoy. Envision the dog fight videos that Peta loves to remind us of.

Dogs are now separated, call has been put out to the single dog trainer/behaviorist on the peninsula, the situation has been brought to my vets attention. I will do what I need to do to make this work....you can see for yourself ...a person with vertigo is not the answer and is frustrating me beyond belief. I will do or will this challenge into the realm of possibilities....I must.

So you can see for yourself....not all has been well at "Wits End Farm". Everything has taken a back seat to my projects, in fact I find them all a bit selfish at the moment. Until there is a change in the goings on I will be rather absent.

Take care my friends....eat your veggies. RD

How to build an inexpensive water feature by Pearl Sandborn"A Storybook Life"

2009-07-05T09:36:00.002+11:30

Home and Garden - Home > $10 Water Garden
See how I built my own water garden for under $10, and
learn how to build your own water garden feature

© Pearl Sanborn

Water gardens are not just for those with piles of extra cash to spend! Anyone could build a beautiful water feature like this one with a bit of time & a few dollars.

About 5 years ago, my husband came home from work to find me digging a hole in our back yard. I'd seen these wonderful little water gardens in all kinds of books and magazines, so knew that I could find a way to build one into our cottage garden.

If you've ever looked into purchasing a pre-formed water garden kit, you know how expensive they can be! I've seen price tags anywhere from a couple of hundred dollars, to a couple thousand or more!

I decided to call my local farm store, and ask them what I could use for a liner. They suggested that I look into a product called a "silo cap." I'm sure all of the farmers who are reading this article will know exactly what I'm talking about. These are the large pieces of plastic that are used to cover a silo & keep the contents dry. They come in different sizes and thicknesses. The averages sizes are; 14x14, 20x20, 26x26 they are all generally 3mils thick, and are black plastic. Prices range from $6 - $15, and you can find one at any farm store. For me this has proven to be a great find! You can also check with your local large building supply store & find some inexpensive sheet plastic.(I recently bought a 100' 4mils. thick for under $8).

Because there are as many opinions as there are people, when it comes to building your pond, don't be put off by any of the nay-sayers that don't share your new found excitement :)

The Hole

To begin this water garden feature, you will need a hole, a liner & water. Some optional things you may also want to look at are; stones, plants, fish, and maybe a water pump. You can finish this project in a few hours - up to half a day.

(Here's the beginnings of my new pond, you can see the plastic, hole, and the stones.)

You need to pick a good location for your new project. Partial shade is nice, because it helps discourage algae growth. You also may not want to position it directly under deciduous trees, because they drop their leaves each fall, and this requires a yearly thorough cleaning. Take a peek through garden books, catalogues, and magazines to help you decide what you like best. It's a very good idea to think things through before you start digging! The size is up to you, but you will need to make sure that you're liner is big enough for your new water garden.

First lay a string, rope, or garden hose around the hole, as this will help you determine the shape. I think a shape other than a complete circle is more attractive and pleasant to look at, but this is entirely up to you. You will also need to decide if you want water lilies, or other water plants. If you do want some type of pond plants directly in the pond, you will have to make it deep enough to accommodate the frost line in your growing zone. One thing you can do is, create shelves in the walls of the pond out of soil to place your potted water plants on. Within the hole, you simply pile up soil to build ledges that are wide enough to fit a potted plant. This will of course then be covered by the pond liner.

The Liner

If you have rocky soil, be sure to take the stones out before you place the liner in the hole. Most sand yards will let you take sand by the bucket full for free, or you could try to sneak some sand from the kids sand box :) Scatter the sand in the bottom of the pond to cushion the liner, and to keep it from tearing on sharp edges.

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(I've laid the plastic down & added some water, so I can position it properly.)

Spreading the liner... Lay the "pond liner" out over the top of the hole, then gently push the liner into the bottom of the pond. You can leave the edges in tact, this will be of use later. Also if you have a larger enough piece of plastic, it wouldn't hurt to double it. This will give you 6 mils of thickness or more, and a longer liner life. Next, fill the pond with water. As you are filling it, carefully position your liner to make sure it stays in place.

The Water

I use water directly out of the hose. If you have city water, be sure to wait at least a couple of days to put any fish in. This will allow enough time for the chlorine to evaporate & the water to reach air temperature. If you skip this step, you could possibly kill your fish!

The Stones

(For a natural effect, place stones around the edge of your garden pond)

Now is the time to cover all those edges of the liner. Use any kind of slate or stone from around your yard and place them around the edges of the pond to make it look as natural as possible. There's nothing worse than seeing a pond with large areas of plastic showing through! I like to place some stones or pebbles in the bottom of the pond to give it a more natural appearance & a place for the fish to hide. Please be careful not to toss stones in - or cause a rip in your pond liner.

The Plants

There are so many kinds of water plants to choose from today. Most are costly, but here are a few frugal garden ideas to make your new habitat look beautiful no matter how much you have to spend! First go to area ponds, swamps, parks, etc. and look at the kinds of plants that are growing in your local area. This will give you an idea of the kinds of plants that are hardy for your area. Many times the owners won't mind if you take a couple of things to further the species ;) Be sure to ask first if it's private property. You also want to look into endangered species laws in your state, so you aren't taking plants unlawfully. This will give you a "free" start to your water garden plants! For planting around the pond, I love things that look tropical. I was able to get a few beautiful ferns from the woods - free. Also plants that you might already have such as; vines, ground cover, small evergreens, forget-me-nots, clover, and day lilies will look beautiful next to your water garden. Again think about nature here. How about cat -tails? They grow in almost all of the ditches in my area. This would be another source of free garden plants for you.

The Fish

For my new fish, I went to the local pet shop & bought some beautiful fish called - feeder goldfish. They were very cheap at only .10 each! I was VERY surprised at how fast they grew. I was also extremely excited when they decided to have babies in their their home! Here in NY our winters are very cold, but because I thought my pond would only partially freeze, I decided to let my fish stay outside in the pond the first year. BUT this was not the case! My little fish froze solid right in the middle of the ice! They looked like fishcicles! OK calm down everyone ;) To my amazement, in the spring when things started to warm up, the little guys started moving around! I could not believe my eyes! They were totally unharmed by the deep sleep! It is totally up to you what you do with your little friends, but you will need to decide how you will take care of the fish before you buy them. =) Some people bring them in the house, and keep them in a child's swimming pool in the basement.

A note on fish: Before you release the fish into your pond, be sure to leave them in the bag & float them in the pond for 45-60 minutes. This will help them adjust to their new home - instead of "jumping in with both feet" :) Caring For Your Water Garden
Try to keep all debris out of the water. This will cause the water to get smelly & might kill the fish. You will need to keep the pond filled up - as the water will evaporate. If you have a small pond, it would be no problem to empty the water out & clean it every spring & fall. Or, if you'd rather, you could just use your hand to remove the leaves & things that have collected over the season.

Other Options

You may want a pump for the beauty of a fountain, or merely circulating the water. Small pumps go for approx. $30. A waterfall is easy to incorporate also.

* Use soil to build up the area where you'd like your waterfall.

* Line that area with a piece of the liner.

* Be sure to bring the liner all the way to the bottom of the pond & overlap it - if you don't the water will drain out! The preferable thing to do is, make the waterfall & pond area with 1 piece of liner if possible.

* Connect a piece of plastic tubing to the pump.

* Bring the tubing up from the back of the waterfall - to the top. This keeps it out of view.

* Arrange some stones to make the actual waterfall. Make this look as natural as possible.

* Put the tube under the first rock so the water can spill out & run down the other rocks to form the waterfall.

I've had my pond for over 5 years & it's still a source of beauty in my yard. Will they come? Oh yes! We've had frogs, tadpoles, butterflies, birds by the flock, bats, hummingbirds, cats, dogs, coons, dragonflies, and more! Just a few more of life's precious gifts! Take a few hours to claim a little piece of earth, for your family enjoyment.

Garden Pond & Water Garden Forum - Ask questions, and share your pond pictures!

I was thrilled when we first moved to this farm. It had the type of large backyard that screamed for a pond. I put Bob to work as we shared the digging process.

I went into the house and left him on his own. I had other things to tend to. When I had not seen him for a while I peeked out the kitchen window. There to my amazement I could only see the top of his head.

I ran out to rescue him from this task. I thanked him profusely as he showed me the shelves he had carved out of the sides of what is clay. And the neat gradual incline should one of the animals step in. Let me say he really got into it. It was huge.

Then our friendly contractor informed me that I would be attracting every snake for miles if I installed this pond. That was enough information for me to halt the process.

It became a fire pit of sorts. Where we burned endless things gathered from the garden or where ever. During the early spring it became the home to several rabbits. Oh, we saw them hopping out now and again. Then the baby rabbits began hopping out.

Needless to say....it isn't a pond, it isn't a fire pit, it is home to whatever decides to lay out a welcome mat. RD

As Promised.....Floor Product Review

2009-06-25T13:35:00.002+11:30

And the product is.....ta da.....Rejuvenate....Floor Restorer and Protectant.

To refresh your memory....my floor is a mess. Quite frankly it needs professional help. A radiator burst this winter and since the room was being used for storage water did seep beneath some of the boxes. Water stains are the worst. They are black and ugly. The floor boards also took a beating....a little uneven here and there.

The rest of the room is passable. Not great. This is where this product did its stuff. It is a room that is a pass through. We all pass through to reach the kitchen. That includes the family, cats,dogs whomever, and whatever. It sees daily traffic. I think it did a fair job on this area. I'll bet money that if your floors are maintained a bit better than mine it would do a terrific job.

I mentioned that if this concoction didn't work a miracle I would paint the floor. I had a white with a wide gray stripe in mind.( one wall is gray) I deferred to Bob in this matter....Painted floors do not sell houses. Ok Bob, I guess we'll just put a rug over it.

I have one, in fact, lying in the barn. Hopefully it will not have damage from whatever lives out there and I can use that. Its a rather rustic looking thing. A rag rug of sorts, lots of wool threads along with muted colored fabrics. Now I'm really hoping that it is still in tact.

That will have to work. It is the appropriate size, and coloring. Remember this is decorating on a budget of next to nothing, not including labor. That's always the stickler anyway.

Tomorrow I will be moving the furniture back in. Yes, I'm still waiting for that gateleg table...a very sore subject around here. The fireplace surround that I spotted from the highway..was a dud. Too damaged. Too much work to restore. And not a real restoration candidate.

Now I can actually take a pic. I bought a new camera. I'm still a beginner but will give it my beat shot.

Why is it that when you paint one room the rest of the house is a mess. Now I'm sure I told you this is a smallish room. It did hold storage type stuff. It is scattered throughout the whole downstairs. Makes it hard to get around. The cats are absolutely frantic with the mess. The dogs give the boxes a once over and their curiosity is satisfied.

Tomorrow, tomorrow I just can't wait. Hope your summer is cool. RD

Best Places to Buy an Old House 2009: Editors' Picks | Best Old House Neighborhoods 2009: Editors' Picks | Photos | Home & Real Estate | This Old House

2009-06-24T10:43:00.001+11:30

Best Places to Buy an Old House 2009: Editors' Picks | Best Old House Neighborhoods 2009: Editors' Picks | Photos | Home & Real Estate | This Old House

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Take another look.

2009-06-21T02:15:00.002+11:30

As I was reading one of many blogs that I either subscribe to or have sent to me by RSS feed or email I came across this one. http://www.pinkofperfection.com. I have been following her for a very long time. She intersperses her delicious looking culinary offerings along with some down-home philosophy.

Last nite it was a review of a book that she liked Victoria Moran's Living a Charmed Life.

With my usual skepticism in tact, and the lateness of the hour I wasn't going to give this new author a read. Like "Oh, yeah" popped into my mind, "right" we all want that.

Much to my surprise this young woman made some very valid points: 1. See life as an adventure,2Make a mark.3)Take Risks 4)Be Disciplined 5). Become a Seeker 6) Live in the Biggest Possible World 7)Care Profoundly 8)Listen to My Instincts9)Appreciate Everything. 10) Be in This for the Long Haul.

This sounds good. How many of these can you honestly delete and tell yourself you've done that, been there. I came to the conclusion, I wish I had had this kind of HOW TO years ago. I could have perhaps saved myself, and others and been more keenly observant and done something differently.

What comes to mind (you knew this was coming). My past ten years here on the Eastern Shore.I've wasted them, I don't think I have learned that much, I've been too busy running things down and generally being miserable. Whose fault is this....you're looking at her.

Now I have had a sort of epiphany....hey, girl, you are here, make the best of it. I'm not talking "settle", I don't think I have a "settle" bone in my body. But if you want a livable house...make it so. This is my first step. I embrace my new found neighbor, the eggman. I'm giving back. I'm trying to become part of a community that has previously made it clear they are not interested in getting to know me.

The list goes on. I'm pleased to say I feel much better about myself. Take yesterday for example. I never shop here, but needed to go to Dollar General. Before, I never so much as received a glance or hiya. THREE people asked me for directions....3 more than have spoken to me in the ten years I have been here. That is progress. I guess I must look more approachable? Could that be it?

Hope your day is filled with adventure, seeing is believing. Make it grand. RD

Just Thoughts for Today.

2009-06-20T04:02:00.002+11:30

I like to think that my house is my palette. I can do with whatever I want. I can change it at will. Something looks out of place...move it.

I have dabbled in actual painting in my life. Mostly on refinished, painted furniture. Now if I were to be generous I would call it 'primitive' or ' rustic'. It may ,in fact, have a category all its own. Known to some as just plain bad.

This self-examination of just how far I will go came about yesterday. Our fireplaces are boarded up. We don't have one of those catchers on top,plus we have curious cats. We don't use the fireplaces anyway, they tend to give us asthma. Soooo, I was asked to paint something on the cover boards.

I actually had something spring to mind, I searched it out. Voila I found it. I think I need to be in a more creative mood to pull this off. It is a good idea though. What do you think?

I went to the library this morning. On our way I spotted the fireplace surround I had mentioned a while back to use in my 'keeping room'. Now I thought this thing would have been long gone...nope, looks weather beaten enough to pass for free. I'm talking that it has been out there for years. Its been moved of course and is covered with new weed growth.Leaning precariously against a telephone pole. I just figure...I was meant to see this thing. Now I must convince Bob to take me there to examine it. Wish me luck.

My back is still a bother. But as usual we women carry on no matter what. I'm just about to move some boxes out of the newly painted room with a dolly and get going on the first few steps of the floor restoration.

By the way, just picked up a new biography of Flannery O'Connor by Brad Gooch. Its one of those must read fast selections, seven days and that's it. Will let you know how I like it. Suns out....wear a hat! RD

Grrrrrrrrrr

2009-06-19T08:17:00.003+11:30

I want to work but I have a strange, from out of the blue backache. You know at my age you don't have to do much and there it is. At any rate I tried to get somethings done. Here goes....

My new glasses are just plain lousy. My daughter refreshed my memory that the last pair made me feel dizzy as well until they were adjusted. This time..without further ado...they make me so unsteady that its best that I'm not painting....anything! So, we'll drive the 120mi and get them adjusted.

My floor Restore Kit arrived today. Yea!Bob talked me out of the neat paint job I was planning. He told me in no uncertain terms....painted wood floors do not sell houses. No matter how clever I thought they might be. Reluctantly, I had to agree. We've got all wood floors, the upstairs is a bit shabbier than the downstairs, but buyers want to see that wood.

So, instead I will try one of these on-line purchases of floor restore kits. Again lots of steps, but hey, the paint job would have been as well. I'll let you know how this product works...if it lives up to all the hype. No...not from Billy Mays..

I've managed to paint the switch plates in the 'keeping room'. No great feat...but I must tell you...its been hours and it still hasn't dried. So you see, when I say that it is humid, it is humid. That is why I did not tackle the painted wallpaper project...Switch plates are fine but the wallpaper...it will have to wait for another day.

I'm thrilled to tell you I have been invited to another open house at Massawoman Farms. It will be held this Sunday, weather permitting. I'm anxious to see what they have. They did mention in their email that a new crop of potatoes is ready. Plus they have quite a few varieties of herbs available.

This is Shore Life...always something to do. Somewhere to go. I like that very much. I just wish they had the veritable bonanza yard sales they had in Arizona. Honestly, Friday was such an exciting day....where to go and what you would find.Bob is happy and well, I guess that matters.

More Shore tomorrow. Keep safe. RD

Doing the Unthinkable

2009-06-18T04:26:00.003+11:30

Well, it really isn't that dramatic. I'm prepping the foyer for 'paint over wallpaper'.

I have been mulling this around for years actually. Strip or paint over. Of course there are arguments both pro and con, all reasonable, but in my opinion I've got the wallpaper that simply won't come off without ruining the wall.

We put the paper up ten years ago. Well, actually Bob put it up. It is stuck for life. Yes, the walls were sized, the seams flawless but it is wearing on my nerves. Why, because this particular area is too dark.

On the other hand I may just want to do this to prove that it can be done. I read a pros opinion and he says that by following all the many steps to the letter you will have a professional looking result. That sure beats all the gloom and doom guys. I'm going into this with that attitude...positive...and you will see the results.

Believe me..when he said it is alot of steps,there are alot of steps. Including my favorite product Bin. This will again be a stinky sticky project. It will also include spackling the seams, sanding them. Of course the initial step will be to sponge the walls down.

This has been of concern to me. It is so humid...will they dry? This is a summer project since we need ventilation for the stinky part. I'm doing the test strip today...that will tell the whole tale.

I'm not unfamiliar with stripping....lordy, I did it to an upstairs bedroom, for an entire summer. The pieces came off in dime sized portions. No, I will not do that again. Another motivation for painting don't you agree?

More Shore tomorrow. Smile at someone...you will both feel better. RD

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2009-06-18T00:10:00.001+11:30

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A New Pizza Place

2009-06-17T03:07:00.002+11:30

Anything new on the Eastern Shore is a cause for celebration. We received the mailer on Friday. By Saturday we had placed an order.

The pizza was not that bad. The crust needed a little tweaking. The sauce tasted homemade. Bountiful application of cheeses. What can I say peperoni is peperoni.

Having said that ... I am astounded at the menu. Didn't this guy watch Gordon Ramsey? Keep it simple, use local produce, and a select few items done superbly.

What came in the mail and is the restaurant's menu was the size of a booklet. How can anyone have all of these items 'fresh'. Can't be done. Must be alot of frozen on there. Perhaps even prepared by microwave. Uggh.

I will repeat that the pizza wasn't bad, but the other two hundred items may take some doing. I want this family to succeed. That is a rare thing here. His only competition is Pizza Hut...which on occasion can be a great filler for "I don"t want to cook nite".

Businesses are closing by the handful at this moment. Gosh, I've been waiting for Kathy's Kitchen to open for a year. The New Jersey couple with their pizza creations closed almost two years ago, and now is a mexican hangout.

The New Jersey pizza place was right in my little town. We were thrilled to have this alternative to the Lunch Box. Alright the pizza was horrible....so covered with Vidalia onions that you couldn't tell if there was an ounce of sauce or toppings underneath. By the second time we specified....no onions please, to deaf ears. That was the end of our own little pizza parlor.

The Lunch Box....puleeze...overpriced fast food that required a healthy dose of Pepto Bismal before and after eating. Thankfully, it too closed its doors this year. Want to buy an overpriced free standing restaurant/dwelling in the town of Parksley?

So it is easy to see why my family cheers on the newcomer. He will soon learn the ways of the Eastern Shore citizens. Cut his menu, make a better crust cut out all the freebies. This guy is appealing to all in uniform except the dog catcher...10% off for all police, fire, soldiers, and teachers (?). Teachers? I ask you...this is a bit over the top.

I fear he will find himself in the same boat that we are. If you are a "come here", you havn't got a chance. Just because. You are foreign until you die....and then they will ask at your gravesite...never knew em.

So much for my restaurant critique. More Shore tomorrow. RD

Can you believe..

2009-06-15T13:46:00.003+11:30

I've been at this computer site for nearly two hours. Yes, two hours, almost non stop. Again working on a practice blog, thanks Jacqui, to upload a background.

Now this has gone beyond all imagination. I know how to create a background. I've done it on other sites without a hitch.

Came across a blog entitled Buster Blog. I immediately signed up. He knows what he is talking about. In fact folks, there is a book out there....Blogger for dummies.

Now that is me. But this installation has gotten me so frazzled I'm thinking of throwing in the towel until I have this down right.

The practice blog was a godsend. I practiced and practiced. You know what I ended up with? My original stinky pink background! That's just too funny.

Oh gosh, I'm much better, thanks for asking. It's so good being on the up side of this thing. I've coughed my head off but that's what Robitussin is for. I'm still a little miffed about how I got this....Bob had to visit a sick client....the rest is history.
More Shore tomorrow. RD ps Here is the Blogger Buster on line book site http://bloggerbuster.s3.amazonaws.com/ebooks/the-blogger-template-book.pdf

Cat out of the Bag

2009-06-14T06:08:00.003+11:30

I don't write about my state of health very often. In fact I find it boring. However I have been absent for a while and there is an explanation...I have a lovely summer cold. End of story. I'm on the mend.

When I found myself browsing new backgrounds I knew that the fight was winding down. If you have any idea what a struggle it is for me to accomplish a new background you would have to agree ....I'm getting better...perhaps not sane as yet.

I want to do a variety of things, among them to bake a banana bread, clean up the windows in the 'keeping room' , hang some paintings, move a bookcase into the nook in the 'keeping room'. blah, blah blah...but at this moment I can't.

More Shore Life tomorrow.RD

Eastern Shore attempt at Ambiance

2009-06-11T05:17:00.002+11:30

Like I've said so often.....ambiance? Sure it is nautical..the blue and white and the painted gray floors. But come on...one wheel on the wall does not make this a cozy place.

We stopped here after our DMV fiasco. It used to be called the General Store. Situated in the town of Onancock on the dock. I liked it better back then, full of memorabilia, nautical and otherwise not so sterile.

The owner, who is older than dirt, assists you to your table. This should be against some rule...he needs help himself. Does not set the mood for enjoyment, unwinding, or anything else.

The joint is jumping in the late evening dinner hours. The menu looked very appetizing. A select few items, probably done well, and quite a few things to munch and crunch on. Mostly seafood selections...like duh...you are on the water, fishing ships anchored nearby, I would hope so.

I've been there in the past, when it was called the General Store. Always happy with my selection. Now, that it is called Mallards, I expect a great deal more...the prices reflect a chef in the kitchen after all.

The atmosphere leaves alot to be desired in the afternoon glare of the sun and wind. Way too bright for my taste. Should be taken down a few notches. The lighting was provided by old sol himself.

We ordered drinks....wow, what a skimpy selection. After being out on the water all day forever how long wouldn't you want something other than Bud light on tap? Maybe its just me....I'm originally from Milwaukee, land of cheese and beer, you would expect a little more. Heck, the yacht club in Milwaukee was a sight to behold. Dining was excellent as was the backbar.

What would you do to make this place....uhmmmmmmmmmmm, a bit more friendly? More Shore tomorrow. RD.

Yukky Is Normal

2009-06-10T03:29:00.003+11:30

At least for the Eastern Shore. My snake sightings have increased. To the point where I am confined to my home. That is not a great loss since I have a multitude of things to be done here. It is however, working on my psyche. Imprisonment is not a happy state. When you are busy you barely notice that you can't garden, carry out trash, do some of my outdoor things.

Once the fact sinks in....'you are a prisoner in your own home' you want to rebel and just go outdoors. And prove exactly what? That you have been an unreasonable person to begin with and 'lookee here, nothing to fear'.

I am not just a person who doesn't like snakes. Take em or leave em. No I am seriously phobic. That alone will tell you it is an unnatural reaction. Hey, some people are phobic about clowns....I'll never understand that one.

I see them in my yard. I watch them hunting the birds in the houses I built and painted for them. I see them slithering (under the house?). I see them in my dreams..constricting my dogs. I am freaked out by electric cords in the house. And on and on.

So you see, what is yukky to me is quite normal and taken for granted if you share any anecdote about snakes with your neighbors. Yet another reason to label me eccentric and worse. Enough of this subject.

Have you ever done something so stupid that you want to keep it to yourself or quite the opposite...tell the world? Here goes, I found a 'deal' on stickum floor tiles for my kitchen. Nothing, mind you, I would rate four stars had I seen it in a store.

The picture, in fact, was quite puzzling. Was it green or blue? Were the mosaics really that small? I bought it anyway....did I mention it was a deal? I can't resist things that may fill the bill at such a reduced price.

I ordered ten boxes. At a steal. Free shipping. Oh lord, they must really be bad. I kept telling myself that this is how I wanted to decorate..on a shoestring and passable. You are aware I want to unload this rural monstrosity as quickly as possible....needing to move on is a very new and realistic goal.

The first two boxes arrived...I must admit...they weren't that bad. Again something I wouldn't give two glances at but will do. Now the rub comes. Free shipping...sure. But at two boxes a day, or every other day or maybe a week inbetween deliveries. That's the deal. Not bad for free...that is what I keep in mind as these heavy boxes arrive two by two. There is always a hitch, a downside, if you will. What price are you willing to pay for free?

That is my confession and I'm sticking to it. Have you ever done something this foolish and paid in the end some way, some how? RD

Under Construction .........again

2009-06-07T14:24:00.003+11:30

I honestly had this page looking exactly as I wanted it to look. Simple, classy, and full of pics and tid bits.

I made the mistake of adjusting things which in no way needed adjusting and poof....all was gone. Including Followers, Comments AND MY HEADER.

LET ME TELL YOU, I am not an engineer, nor a patient person so this has been ever so frustrating. I went back to my Shabby Blogs site....grabbed something to make my page less generic....oh, come on...its industrial looking....I'm hardly that.

Went to Google my dilemma and low and behold....'if you lost your header .. you are in real trouble.' Duh...but nothing that I could understand that would get it back.

Where did it go? I kept trying to find it.... no luck. It did offer a suggestion that I could understand stating 'you must go back'....like where?

I've been on here long enough to know it isn't a piece of cake, but come on guys, lets make the instructions for the computer phobic ,like myself, easy peasy.

I've got a heck of a lot better things to do than read things I don't understand or better yet don't want to understand. Like what's a Zip file? Everything is in a zip file, including 47MG of my yahoo blogs. I shouldn't have to enroll in an on line computer class to get a background for my blog.

Another subject please .... The eggman dropped off more produce....yea. He starts planting in his greenhouse in February. I can't believe my ears....it is darn cold here in February. We received three cabbages...I've made one batch of cole slaw...it was yummy. The second one is booked for stuffed cabbage leaves,yup it is still chilly enough for that heavy meal. The third....who knows...I don't plan ahead that far.

In the produce package we had more yellow squash, zucchini, and shallots. Can you believe it? I sent over an old timey school desk for his daughter( she plays school) and several boxes of books. This gifting thing is nice...I've got too much of one thing and he has too much of another. Life couldn't be simpler.

Ok...I haven't mentioned my 'keeping room' walls. I need to BUY another gallon of paint. Oh, I'm fit to be tied. I really wanted to avoid that, but in this case it can't be helped. All the prep work in the world wouldn't have made a difference, they are simply thirsty walls.

The color is disappointing to me. Looked pink in the can and now that it is up the contrast between the trim and the walls is so slight as to almost blend. I'll bet they put a whole drop of red in the mix. So I'll be at my favorite store Lowes tomorrow.

The cats are romping so it must be late...they sleep all day and at night the scampering begins.Great clock to set my life by. Tomorrow...more Shore. RD

Its raining, its pouring.....

2009-06-06T08:31:00.000+11:30

Just to let you know....the color is up....well sort of. It is so light almost white. No fear of a pink room there.

We had to shut down. Electricity going on and off. More paint tomorrow. RD

Jocasta Innes

2009-06-06T07:21:00.005+11:30

About Jocasta
Jocasta was born in Nanking, China. Her childhood was much travelled (as her father worked for Shell), education patchy until she fetched up in the UK, studying at Girton College, Cambridge, where she took a Modern Language degree. She flirted with journalism (London Evening Standard), translated books for a living, married twice, had four children, hit the big time with Paint Magic (a blockbuster), rescued a Regency house from demolition, wrote books, presented a TV series, started a business, cycled across London to work at Cosmopolitan magazine, cooked, mothered, decorated, fell in love with an architect ( Sir Richard MacCormac) and lived the frantic, driven but mainly enjoyable life of a working woman and mother in the late 20 century. That was then.

Today she lives in the same Regency house, which is still evolving — decoratively speaking — and was recently featured in Hello and the London Magazine. She has collaborated with Sir Richard MacCormac as a colour consultant for major exhibitions at the Tate Modern and Tate Britain. She appears regularly on television as an interiors expert, has been the subject of many magazine and newspaper articles and is currently publicising her latest book, Home Time. Her home is still the most important place to her.

Listen to me on BBC Radio
4`s Woman`s Hour!
This is the author, artist and idea person I always go to when looking to make improvements.

From the list of books that she has written I clearly have missed out on a few of them. My dogeared copy of 'The Thrifty Decorator' is the go to book for me. From these pages I can add or subtract and get the look I'm longing to have.

I'm not that creative in this area. I need help and am not afraid to look things up or just ask. I am more of an idea person, I can visualize a space, and to get there I need guidance.

I own quite a few books on decorating, painting furniture, and ethnic touches. They sit there on my bookshelves until there is a dire need. We now have the advantages of the computer, but that isn't like holding it in your hands and going over the process.

I highly recommend any of her books for the 'how to diva' in my opinion.

http://www.jocastainnesdesign.com/

Zinsser makes Bin

2009-06-05T01:01:00.000+11:30

I rarely rave about a product. Not that there aren't many out there, telling us that they do this and that. Bin says it will prime and tighten up the surface and it does.

This latest beautification project wasn't my cup of tea. I haven't designated it for anything as yet,so it is a 'go with the flow' type of thing. As you recall, I do the oops thing and that leaves me quite limited as to just exactly what I will do.

It required two coats of Bin. Yup, it was that bad. The walls had to be hand scraped then the primer applied. The waiting time is the worst for me....I want to see color.

The ceiling is a boring white, along with the trim. This works. I had it around and it is just enough to finish the job. The doors will be a light gray, along with the stripe on the newly painted floors. Like I mentioned in a past post...the walls will be a light, light pink. This is a new thing for me. I'm not a pinky by nature but it is here and it was free.

I won't be painting today. I wear paint and I need to have an eye exam so I won't attempt to keep spotless and get it all done and look presentable for the new doc.

Think I will be watching the paint dry. Noooo, still putting finishing touches in the bedroom. Will that ever be finished? This room is one of those projects that is never quite complete. A dab of white found its way onto the burgundy, or vice versa. Oh, the switch plates need to be fitted. Do you paint your closets? That too. Do it right I say.

I do have other paintless projects that can keep me busy until it is time to go. Tell all tomorrow. RD

Wow...A book That is a must in my home....

2009-06-02T11:50:00.000+11:30

Cover image of Pretty Pet Friendly by Julia Szabo
Pretty Pet-Friendly: Easy Ways
to Keep Spot᾿s Digs Stylish
& Spotless

As a pet parent, you know the challenge of trying to keep your home clean and stylish while maintaining a Pet-Friendly environment. When Julia Szabo, a renowned author and pet columnist for the New York Post and Country Living Magazine, faced this challenge she was inspired to write Pretty Pet-Friendly: Easy Ways to Keep Spot’s Digs Stylish & Spotless.

Pretty Pet-Friendly combines high style with an environmentally friendly standpoint to show you how having a Pet-Friendly pad can actually mean having the prettiest place on the block.

Pretty Pet-Friendly is filled with ideas to live well with your furry kids. It walks you through each area of the home, from the kitchen to the living room to the bedroom, providing practical tips, helpful how-tos, and unique recommendations for keeping things neat, Pet-Friendly, and chic.

Here’s an example of what you’ll find in some of the chapters of Pretty Pet-Friendly.
This cat enjoys a clean home environment
Floor Plan

As Szabo writes, “the floor is your dog or cat’s eminent domain. They eat there, sleep there and play there. And even the most well behaved pet will make messes there, too. Which is why your floor has to be designed to take a beating—or at least conceal the evidence.”

In Pretty Pet-Friendly, Szabo gives you easy, practical ways to keep your floors clean without sacrificing style—from your entryway and throughout each room of your home.

Learn what makes modular carpet tile an excellent flooring choice, especially for apartments; why, when it comes to hardwood floors, the harder the better; and why ceramic tile is the ideal option for large surfaces in any pet residence.

Szabo also gives her perspective on pet beds, including her point that where you position your dog or cat’s bed in your home is almost as important as the bed itself.

I have been convinced that all of the articles I read, blogs I subscribe to DO NOT HAVE PETS!...How on earth could they? Or...more reasonable to conclude....photo shoots take a very long time and the hounds and felines scatter. That must be it.

I have been trying, with little success, to shoot my new burgundy bedroom. There is always at least one cat reclining on the bed. Now this is a normal state of affairs but for the feline phobic I'm sure it is distressing.

I pride myself on being the queen of stain and odor removers...I've tried them all, and I know which ones are for the birds. But to physically remove a cat from her designated spot...it needs a vacuum cleaner set up very close. Believe me they scatter.

Just an aside.....my home in Carefree Az was on the market for on and off five years. Tell me I didn't have some tricks up my sleeve. The ultimate sale of the house had nothing to do with the critters,but the ambiance. It was an artist home..all light was geared to the shadows and light. Not everyone's cup of tea. Also the location....that was the major drawback, except for adults. It hung precariously from a cliff. So you just know...after I worked for hours de-odorizing, de staining, and the realtor brought up a couple towing toddlers I very nearly screamed. Enough of this.

I'm happy to say I can order this book pronto. It is a must read. After all this glamorification of the farm house it better look and smell like Coco Channel.RD

Afterthoughts.....

2009-05-31T15:53:00.000+11:30

I am one of many women who do things on their own, have a penchant for beautification projects, ON A BUDGET.

I have searched the blogisphere and have come up with a sorry few women who do the beautification thing (and do it well) ON A BUDGET and write about it..If I were an interior designer this wouldn't be a problem, if my budget allowed I wouldn't be stressed at the enormous outlay of cash for each project.

I'm asking....have you come across such a blog? I'd appreciate a little info on that subject. I have a few that are on my blogger reading roll, and would like to add to these.

I've finished the burgundy bedroom. I do like it. Very soothing and eclectic. I like a variety of things surrounding me and this is what this room offers.

Pics later. Oh, I know I have promised pics but there is a problem...I don't own a camera, my daughters new picture phone is a dud, and B's camera just doesn't take a good pic.
Yup, still working on the chandelier...I thought of buying more crystals to finish the project and sat down and wondered why? Heck I have enough crystals I just need to redesign what I have.

The keeping room is coming along. It sure was a keeping room. I kept junk in there and it is a pass through room so you could see the clutter. Clutter gone. First layer of Bin paint on the walls and ceiling.

Eighteen hours from now I will be applying the paint. Drying time is essential here. It is so frigging humid here it takes an eternity to dry and tighten up. This is where I made my mistake in the past....I was too eager to see the paint on the walls and skipped the drying time. It is heartbreaking to see all your work roll off the walls six months later. Not this time.

Again I will be utilizing my finds on the OOPS pile at Home Depot or Lowes. This room will be a very pale, pale almost white pink. Yes, I said pink. I dont believe it myself, but there you go...the price was right.

The floor will be painted as well. Fat gray and white stripes. The radiator burst its pipes this past winter and because of the junk in there water damage went unnoticed and has stained very bad. I wanted black and white diamonds, but my daughter brought up the stripe idea and I went for it....see its about the measuring, I can do stripes not diamonds.

How do you like AFTERTHOUGHTS as a name of a blog....I seem to have a plethora of them. In fact, I've always felt like an afterthought. Good day to you. RD

New House.....new challenge or money pit.

2009-05-28T15:31:00.000+11:30

I'd like to think that I found my dream house. That could mean just about anything at this time. Why....because my feelings for things tangible is not at its peak right now. I must admit I'm usually pretty good at making decisions quickly and usually with few or no regrets.

Sounds like I'm prepping you and myself for a really big undertaking or a huge letdown. That may very well be the case. But let me tell you about it and perhaps seeing my thought written will be the final straw.

It is located in Texas, I've been wanting to go back west for ages. My husband says Arizona is out of the question, no matter what storybook places I pull up from the net he always says 'no'. Ok, so I look in Texas, and why not? It is gorgeous to me on many levels, lifestyle, home design, and most of all people. Oh, then again there is the climate factor...its yukky here...humid beyond belief and always a bit of a damp chill. Not for me.

I digress....It has 3600 plus square feet. Enough space for my animals and the three of us. Four baths, just incase one hasn't been cleaned, or is being used for our latest rescue. (It has happened) It has 6 bedrooms. An acre lot on a golf course.This may be a problem with putting up a privacy fence.

But.....it is a mess. Everything needs re-doing. Just walls,windows and damaged doors. EeeeeGad what am I thinking? I will attempt to copy the photos of this place tomorrow. Oh, and the exterior is a mess as well. But the price......is sweet!

Is this just another foray into my fantasy world to be able to resurrect this diamond in the rough....real rough? Can this sows ear be turned into a silk purse? Get my drift? I'm beginning to think I won't be able to pull this one off.

It is so far removed from anything I have ever considered. Like charm, good bones, plumbing, wiring. I just can't sleep nites thinking about this place. What do you think? Pics tomorrow. RD.

What Would You Do?

2009-05-25T13:54:00.000+11:30

Vet school helps cat burned by owners
‘Phoenix’ came to MU from KC.

Photo by Gerik Parmele

The University of Missouri’s veterinary hospital is taking care of Phoenix, a cat whose owners set it on fire more than a week ago.

By Janese Heavin

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Advertisement

A 1-year-old cat set on fire by her young owners with lighter fluid is recovering at the University of Missouri’s Veterinary Medical Teaching Hospital.

photo

Photo by Gerik Parmele

The University of Missouri’s veterinary hospital is taking care of Phoenix, a cat whose owners set it on fire more than a week ago. With Phoenix are vet school student Christine Murphy, left, and veterinary medicine intern Kara Osterbur.

The cat was taken to Columbia on Saturday after two Kansas City brothers, ages 9 and 12, set fire to her and a family dog last week. The dog died, but the cat survived and ran away. She returned to the home a few days later, and the family alerted animal control officials, said Wayne Steckelberg, a veterinarian at the Half Way Home Pet Adoptions shelter in Kansas City, which initially treated her.

Parents of the children, who declined to give their names or show their faces, told Fox 4 News in Kansas City that the boys have mental disabilities.

Each of the boys faces two counts of juvenile charges for animal cruelty, and the 12-year-old also faces a charge of arson, said Bill Jackson of the Jackson County Juvenile Justice Center.

The cat, Phoenix, doesn’t appear to be holding any grudges, though.

“It’s amazing, that cat,” Steckelberg said. “It was purring. I think if it were me, I wouldn’t be purring.”

Phoenix — named by those at the shelter after a mythological bird that rose from the ashes — has second-degree burns on the tips of her ears, back left leg, whiskers, tail and anal area.

“She was pretty sad-looking,” said Kara Osterbur, an intern at the MU School of Veterinary Medicine clinic.

Students and faculty at the veterinary school sedated her, cleaned her wounds and bandaged her, Osterbur said.

After she heals a little more, she’ll head back to the animal shelter in Kansas City.

If she’s not snatched up by a new owner there, several veterinary students have said they’d be interested in adopting her, Osterbur said.

She and Steckelberg said it’s not rare to see abused animals, but neither had ever seen a pet intentionally set on fire.

“We see a lot of animals come in badly abused,” Osterbur said. “It’s extremely sad, but we’re lucky to get to help them and provide them with care and make them feel better.”

Reach Janese Heavin at 573-815-1705 or e-mail jheavin@columbiatribune.com.

Nutro Products Announces Voluntary Recall.

2009-05-24T14:00:00.000+11:30

NCCC Logo Max Cat Logo
Nutro Products Announces Voluntary Recall of Limited Range of Dry Cat Food Products

Franklin, Tennessee (May 21, 2009) -- Today, Nutro Products announced a voluntary recall of select varieties of NUTRO® NATURAL CHOICE® COMPLETE CARE® Dry Cat Foods and NUTRO® MAX® Cat Dry Foods with “Best If Used By Dates” between May 12, 2010 and August 22, 2010. The cat food is being voluntarily recalled in the United States and ten additional countries. This recall is due to incorrect levels of zinc and potassium in our finished product resulting from a production error by a US-based premix supplier.

Two mineral premixes were affected. One premix contained excessive levels of zinc and under-supplemented potassium. The second premix under-supplemented potassium. Both zinc and potassium are essential nutrients for cats and are added as nutritional supplements to NUTRO® dry cat food.

This issue was identified during an audit of our documentation from the supplier. An extensive review confirmed that only these two premixes were affected. This recall does not affect any NUTRO® dog food products, wet dog or cat food, or dog and cat treats.

Affected product was distributed to retail customers in all 50 states, as well as to customers in Canada, Mexico, Japan, Korea, Thailand, Malaysia, Singapore, Indonesia, and Israel. We are working with all of our distributors and retail customers, in both the US and internationally, to ensure that the recalled products are not on store shelves. These products should not be sold or distributed further.

Consumers who have purchased affected product should immediately discontinue feeding the product to their cats, and switch to another product with a balanced nutritional profile. While we have received no consumer complaints related to this issue, cat owners should monitor their cat for symptoms, including a reduction in appetite or refusal of food, weight loss, vomiting or diarrhea. If your cat is experiencing health issues or is pregnant, please contact your veterinarian.

Consumers who have purchased product affected by this voluntary recall should return it to their retailer for a full refund or exchange for another NUTRO® dry cat food product. Cat owners who have more questions about the recall should call 1-800-833-5330 between the hours 8:00 AM to 4:30 PM CST

At long last....this has been three or more years in the making.RD

Taken from Wesabe: Frugal Foodies

2009-05-23T15:06:00.000+11:30

The Best Beef Ever

Last year, a friend & I went in on a quarter of a cow with a local farmer. I finally got to pick it up at the end of November this year and wanted to share.

I have to recommend this – we ended up spending around $500 total, and got 110lbs of grass-fed, free-range, antibiotic & hormone-free, humanely raised & butchered local beef. It was portioned out by the butcher to be compatible with our 2-person households, and just barely fit in our standard freezers.

By this point, we’ve both tried it and I have to say it’s the best tasting beef I’ve ever had in my life. I’m signing up again this year, and swearing off anything but. If you can find someone who does this in your area, I strongly recommend it – just under $5/lb for some of the best beef you’ll ever eat is an amazing bargain.

Not to mention the ecological & ethical bonuses – keeping money in the local economy, voting with my dollar for hormone/antibiotic free meat, and giving cows a chance to eat grass rather than supporting grain-producing agribusiness… I found my farmer through the local newspaper, but www.eatwild.com has a searchable database of producers.

While I have heard about this I have never tried this...have you? What are your thoughts? Sounds good. RD

Define your style Quiz

2009-05-21T11:58:00.001+11:30

What's your design style?
Woman posing in front of a chaise lounge.
Susan Redman
February 26, 2009

Are you a retro bohemian or a sleek minimalist? Find out your design style with our quick quiz, then read on to discover how to get in touch with your aesthetic side.

When it comes to decorating, it pays to know your inner stylist. Especially since your two best friends seem so effortlessly intimate with theirs. Without hesitation, Anna, for example, gravitates to dark, rich colours, exotic pieces and vintage finds with an intriguing history. Julie, on the other hand, is chic yet sensible, hates clutter and fills her home with understated elegance and strategically positioned heirlooms. To confound you even further, both seem to innately understand how to accentuate their style with mood lighting and colour, while the only thing you can be sure of drawing attention to in your home is a hotchpotch of disparate ideas and general mess.

For better or worse, our homes are an extension of who we are and an expression of personality. But pop culture philosopher Alain de Botton, author of The Architecture Of Happiness, has a much deeper assessment that gives hope to those of us still trying to sort out just what our sofa says about us: "What we call a beautiful house is one that rebalances our misshapen natures and encourages emotions which we are in danger of losing sight of . . . we respect a style which can move us away from what we fear and towards what we crave."

It's a comforting thought that we all aspire to live in harmony by surrounding ourselves with beauty. But, still, how do we find that style we so "respect"? Or, put simply, what kind of wall clock will get us ticking? The stainless-steel industrial disc, sans numerals? Or the post-modern, acid-yellow cuckoo clock?

Award-winning interior designer Andrew Parr of SJB Interiors (sjb.com.au), urges us not to be coy. Take a bold approach, he advises, as this will present a style template. "Make a decision to be monochromatic, contrasting or loud and vibrant and remain true to this general vision," he says. "Observe items that capture your imagination and remember them in your compositions. Try to mix polished against matt, rough against smooth and, finally, observe how simple repetitive items or groupings make maximum impact."

Sought for her calming "modern style that is not too hard-edged", interior designer Lisa Stein (lisasteininteriors.com.au) says it's a matter of getting focused. "Think about how you already live and dress, what colours you are drawn to, what shapes in furniture you like and what textures bring you comfort," she says. She also suggests you start filing magazine clippings and to make a mental note of favourite items already in your house. "These can form the basis of a whole new look," she says.

It's about eliminating the ho-hum and accentuating directional pieces. "You can't go far wrong with a warm, contemporary look that can be embellished and mixed up with antiques or family treasures," Stein says.

Of course, having an eye for style is made better with experience but if you are just getting started there are four main decorating themes to choose from.

Winning the popularity contest is modern - think clean lines, solid colours and designer-labelled furniture. This look has industrial chic and sanitised minimalism at its extremes but somewhere in the middle you'll find a softer option perfectly suited to busy lifestyles.

Traditional is an aesthetic usually built around historical elements like antiques or reproduction furniture. These are stocked at top-shelf retailers and include sub-styles like French provincial, country or romanticism.

Then there is retro, which borrows from mid-20th century modernism but includes Scandinavian design, 1950s tiki and pop art.

Hardest to define but equally enduring is ethnic or bohemian. It's a style that takes cues from the well-travelled collector. Asian, African or South American influences are obligatory - it's the Lonely Planet answer to interior design.

Luke Harrison, general manager of the International School of Colour and Design, says the quiz will categorise readers into one of five groups: sleek new earth, Hamptons white wash, New York loft, sophisticated retro and nostalgic nest - intriguingly, the leading trend.

According to Harrison, its popularity is a sign of the times. "People don't have the budget these days, so we have to be more creative in our choices and personalise a look," he says. "Nostalgic nest is the style you can't buy from a shelf. You have to mix the old with the new. It's the most individualised of the all the groups."

Sounds like at the end of the day it's all up to you. But don't forget, stay focused and don't be afraid to branch out . . .

To find out more about your style or discover more about decorating to suit your own style, the International School of Colour and Design is holding a free Personal Style Discovery Workshop on March 21 from 10am to 1pm. Bookings essential, phone 9114 5988. See iscd.edu.au
Take the test of discovery

1. Which items would you most likely accessorise your home with?

a Sea shells

b Key designer pieces

c Artefacts from travels

d Items inspired from nature

e Lots of pieces inspired from the past

2. Which of the following activities would you ideally like to do?

a Walk on the beach

b Dress up

c Make things

d Anything outdoors

e Shop for antiques

3. Which colour would you most likely find in your home?

a Neutral palette

b Metallic palette

c Warm palette

d Earth palette

e Cool palette

4. Which of the following movies would you rent first?

a Something's Gotta Give

b Lost In Translation

c The Notebook

d An Inconvenient Truth

e Casino Royale

5. Which colour are you most attracted to?

a White linen

b Charcoal

c Coffee bean brown

d Rainforest green

e Ripe cherry red

6. Which of the following best describes where you buy your clothes from?

a Department stores

b High Street boutiques

c A mix of places

d Eco-friendly/socially responsible retailers

e Shopping centres
ANSWERS

Mostly As: Hamptons White Wash

You don't live by the sea, you live with the sea. You like a calm and balanced environment. Your home is treasured and a temple to all you love. You fill it with loved memories, often with pieces that have a story to tell. You love details (sea shells, raffia) and you create your home to be a central meeting point - an environment for people to come together and spend time. Rooms go beyond their initial function (eg, the kitchen is used not only to prepare food).

Mostly Bs: New York Loft

A global trendsetter. You believe the built environment is more spectacular than the natural one and you're hooked on architectural detail. Your style remains distinctive, yet ever-evolving and true to your own self - you don't buy off the shelf. High ceilings, open-plan, rich and luxurious are key components. You pick up on trends but integrate them into your life. While you enjoy the finer things in life, you fill your home with loved memories and key pieces collected over time. A balance of function and excess.

Mostly Cs: Nostalgic Nest

Like a bower bird, you collect bits and pieces. You are earthy, sentimental, individual and your home is rich with detail. You treat your home as a gallery filled with happy memories, photo albums, unique souvenirs from travels and your own made treasures. Displaying your true self on the walls, your collection tells a story. Spending time away from the home - outdoors and exploring - is just as important as spending time in the home. You are not concerned with what your neighbours' homes are like: you are true to your own style.

Mostly Ds: Sleek "New Earth"

You love the outdoors and bring that into your living environment. The technological side of the environment is considered. You evaluate trends and bring those that complement your lifestyle into your home.

Mostly Es: Sophisticated Retro

You recognise and respect good design from the past and present. You pick up key pieces over time and enjoy making them work together. While you are aware of innovations, you do not necessarily follow trends. As you are both confident and authentic, you have been collecting pieces for years and you display them with pride in abstract ways in your home.

This quiz was developed by the International School Of Colour And Design to show people the various styling trends available to them. It is not a determiner of a definite style but is intended to open your eyes to the manifold different decorating styles. These five decorating styles are the most relevant for our current lifestyle.

What's Your Style?

2009-05-12T03:23:00.000+11:30

Looking around other blogs, serious ones at that, explaining the virtues of this or that style I have come to the conclusion that mine is "Shaggy Bohemian Cottage". Whew, I wonder if I could Google this and come up with something that is just right for me. I doubt it....and frankly , who cares? Its what I like.

Components of each of these styles is a mix that I enjoy being around, a sort of comfort zone.

I came here to my farm house 10 years ago. At that time I was fixated on 'high country'. I just thought my house would lend itself well to that style. I did and it still would, but I'm tired of it.

Change is something I thrive on. I get tired of things very quickly, when it no longer suites my purpose or color palette I get rid of it. That is what I am trying to do. It will take time, I need to find the perfect items. I will be upholstering and painting my little heart out.

I am dreading the living room....what was I thinking? All that wallpaper to be removed. This may not be complete in my lifetime. But there are plenty of other spaces I lend my hand to.

This is what I will be doing in the future. As I complete a project I will share. Like that sweet little gateleg table....if it ever comes. For now, I'm working on the chandelier, and my bedroom.

Have a great day.RD

Here we go......its officially summer.

2009-05-11T12:10:00.000+11:30

How would you like to have one of these fellas trying his best to get into your kitchen door? Nope, I didn't think so. This is the third year, since moving to the Eastern Shore, that he has tried to invade MY space.

Let me just say....I don't like snakes, not one little bit. In fact, I will tell you quite honestly...I scream like a woman when I catch a glimpse of one anywhere near my space. Yeah, I know all about their good qualities, I look them up every year. So... I ask you...if this is a rat snake...do we have rats?

I live rural. Surrounded by acres and acres of whatever the farmer plans on putting in this year. Mostly it has been soy beans or corn. I also live quite close to a creek so therefore the water snakes arrive as well.

I know this is a fact of life. And it is more than likely it is the same snake....they can live up to 23 years, but it sure scares the pants off of me. I will be doing indoor projects for awhile. I never venture out immediately after a sighting.

I did find a sweet gateleg table this weekend. I'm thinking of painting it shinny red. Have a spot chosen in the keeping room. I'm a little more than concerned though,we asked for it to be delivered yesterday, paid for and all. Its still not here. Hmmmmmm. Shore Life.RD

Its a Comfort Food Day

2009-05-07T04:57:00.000+11:30

The $15 Grilled Cheese

This stacked creation was born out of Ontario-based chef Randy Feltis’s adoration for exotic cheeses and thick-cut bread. Melted in between the garlic-, parsley- and butter-seasoned loaf lies a brilliant blend of brie, aged Cheddar, Italian Asiago and Havarti cheeses. Photographer: Douglas Bradshaw; Food Stylist: Claire Stubbs; Prop Stylist: Janet Walkinshaw

Ingredients:

* 1/2 cup butter, softened
* 3–4 garlic cloves, crushed
* 1/4 cup chopped fresh parsley
* 8 slices fresh baked bread, 1/2 inch to 1 1/2 inches thick (Italian, potato, sourdough, cheese, whole-grain, or light rye bread)
* 8 slices brie cheese
* 8 slices aged cheddar cheese
* 8 slices Asiago cheese
* 8 slices havarti cheese

Directions:

In a bowl, combine the butter, garlic, and parsley. Spread on 8 slices of the bread. In a large skillet over low heat, place 2 slices of bread in the pan, butter-side down. Place 2 slices of each variety of cheese on top of the bread and cover with another piece of bread, butter-side up. Cook the first side until golden brown, then flip and repeat. Covering the pan will help the cheese melt better, especially considering the thickness of the bread. When both sides are browned, cut on the diagonal, and serve.

Café Confidential:

Dill pickles, potato chips, and ketchup go well with this monster cheese fest. But if you’re feeling creative, try adding prosciutto ham, salami, mortadella, black forest ham, shaved roast beef, or anything else that appeals to you.

Actually it is National Grilled Cheese Month, according to Woman's Day Mag. I find this a necessity no matter which month it is. This is indeed my comfort food. I prepare them on a regular basis. In fact, I had one today. Not this flavorful..but close.

Woman's Day Mag has quite a few selections to make your grilled cheese experience an adventure. You really need to check them out. I've copied and pasted a few of them myself for future....comfort food days. RD

Having a pet peeve... The more you have the more you end up with. Like a hydra:

2009-05-04T02:45:00.001+11:30

I'd say without a doubt I'm more than a bit peeved. Circumstances have prevented me from blogging about the things I love. Houses and cooking.

I'm not an architect nor an interior designer. So I post what I like. I try to figure out how I can duplicate or improve on an image.

Food... I like food, like to read about it, like to try things out and I follow a recipe to the letter.

But....here is my peeve. I follow many blogs on these two subjects and I find that they are rarely geared toward the reader that 1) can't even find the ingredients in her local super market. (I'm rural, remember) and 2) wouldn't have the time in this lifetime to concoct these delicacies. (I run a sanctuary, remember)

The decorating blogs, although pleasing to the eye, cost a mint. How about us do-it yourselfers? Or better yet, the folks that have to do without? I'm peeved when I read about these storybook lives of finding a second home in the Azors, or having the Barnum and Baily circus come to perform for their child's fourth month birthday.

Its not real. Not meant for folks like myself. I do more without than they will ever in their lifetimes. I live by the internet. That is where I buy Greek yo
gurt or Brazil nuts to feed my cats and dogs.

This borders on a whine, I know, and perhaps I sound a bit envious, maybe I am. I have lived that life. I too could make my dreams come true by signing a check or making a call....just not the house in Switzerland with the rustic decor.

I,at first, thought I could manage the homesteading life. I have been beaten soundly about the head at each turn. I wanted a high country home decor, along with a barnyard full of chickens and gardens producing my every whim. This didn't happen and I have become a peevish drone.

I do read the "Mother Earth News", "This old House", and similar blogs as well. Finding Green as despicable as glamor Louis the IV, I just can't find my niche.

My blog will continue with this addendum in mind. I don't give a hoot if I didn't qualify for a nameless widget. I will blog about life, my life. If I'm doing a project....well I'll show you that as well. If it is raining, I'll relay that bit of information as well. As for now, I'm singing in the shower by myself anyway...so why do I care?

I also have another theory....I just got over a nasty bit with the flu, then I had a toxic reaction to Chantix. Could this be the 'aftershock'? RD

Meet the Monte Cristo

2009-04-14T10:15:00.000+11:30

Monte Cubano
Serves1

* Active time:15 min
* Start to finish:15 min

March 2009
This two-in-one indulgence has the irresistible makings of a Cuban sandwich, including Swiss cheese, pickles, and sliced meats—but it’s also dipped in egg batter and fried like a Monte Cristo. View more of our favorite recipes from this issue.

* 2 slices firm bread
* 1 to 2 teaspoons mustard
* 4 or 5 dill pickle rounds
* 2 slices boiled or baked ham
* 2 slices smoked turkey
* 3 thin slices Swiss cheese
* 1/2 garlic clove
* 1/2 tablespoon mayonnaise
* 1 large egg
* 2 tablespoons whole milk
* 1 tablespoon unsalted butter

*
Spread 1 slice of bread with mustard and top with pickles, meats, and cheese. Mince and mash garlic to a paste with a pinch of salt, then mix with mayonnaise. Spread on remaining slice of bread and assemble sandwich.
*
Beat together egg, milk, and 1/8 tsp each of salt and pepper, then soak sandwich in egg mixture.
*
Melt butter in a heavy medium skillet over medium-low heat. Cook sandwich, uncovered, until underside is well browned, about 4 minutes. Flip and cook remaining side, covered, until well browned, 3 to 4 minutes. Remove from heat and let stand, covered, 1 minute.

Recipe by Maggie Ruggiero

Photograph by Romulo Yanes

This is a great way to serve your leftover turkey and ham. It was a much anticipated treat in our household.

Of course, this one is a bit altered from the original, what isn't. We used guyrere cheese and with butter to spare pan fried our temptations.

I always become just a bit maudlin after a holiday. I seem to go back in time and think of those who have passed. So what better way to remember them then to step back in time and create our best loved treats. Remembering them and celebrating the traditions seems to work for me. RD

Happy Easter.

2009-04-13T03:04:00.001+11:30

My bluebirds have returned to their home. I am so thrilled. Well, ofcourse, it could be a different family.

I restore birdhouses. Yup, I find them at thrift stores and doll them up for new tenants.

I couldn't ask for anything more for Easter. Have a great day. RD