That used to be my motto. Getting things done did not need to be thought about but done as quickly as possible and on to the next. Not so anymore. Oh, I'll admit there are multitudes of things that need doing but I realized that I can't do them. Well, not all of them.
We are getting there....slow but sure. That could very well be my motto now. I work slowly and then that may be too much. The frustrations are building up and have nowhere to go. I can't pick up the phone and talk to a nearby pal. My support system now comprises my daughter and husband. And they each have issues themselves so cannot begin to understand what is going on.
I don't know what is going on. The doctors do not know what is going on. When do you call it quits and throw your arms up in the air and say 'uncle'.Alright, I'm giving it just one more shot. I've been referred to a pulmonologist. That will take place several weeks from now. I also have more blood tests to fulfil...geez, the blue marks are just fading from the last time.
Have you ever been on an amusement ride and in the middle of it wanted to get off? No way you can stop get off collect yourself and go on to the next ride. That is very much what I'm experiencing. It all starts with the dizziness. Out of the blue mind you....then it moves on to short of breath.
You feel like you can barely make it to your room or some other safe place to sit or lie down. You grab at anything that is available to you to keep from falling. Your arms are outstretched and you take on the Frankenstein shuffle. You finally park yourself somewhere, hopefully near your medication.
These episodes can sneak up on you in another manner.....I'm told I will be late, or why isn't dinner ready, some such nonsense which you would normally have roll off your back and tell them to JUST WAIT. Not so...you are not unlike a fainting goat. You want to drop then and there....I have not fallen on my back with all four limbs in the air, that may be next.
So far the doc has given me a new asthma med, a breathing machine, and oxygen. If you think about it it does have merit...somehow blood pressure plummets, you feel faint or dizzy and the oxygen should revive you to continue what ever you've been doing.
Now I look the same. Nothing has changed. My balance is impaired and that is what you can see, but I cannot take a chance on wandering too far from my stash of meds so I have become housebound. This, to me, is almost intolerable, but that is the state of things at this moment.
We are expecting a house appraiser any time within the next few weeks. So in addition to cleaning in spurts and fits to accommodate this fellow. I'm having to put things away that I love to work on between chores and flopping around . This is maddening.
My daughter's surgery was approaching at a fast pace. After three years of pain and agony of walking on a lump in her arch, and being seen by several doctors one of whom said it was nothing to worry about, Fri was the cut out date. She went in for pre-op work up yesterday and was told she had a hernia and they could not operate.
The surgical scheduling is quite a challenge for these doctors. From the main hospital Peninsula Regional, a specialty surgical place to now McReady Hospital in Chrisfield Md. She has been shuffled around and is getting the tumor removed on the 28th. I'm wondering.....everything is being done with such haste after sitting on this for three years.
This is just the normal day to day life on the farm. Nothing special, but each item taken by itself is either troubling, or time consuming beyond belief. I'm far from throwing the towel in over these matters I just don't want to wait weeks and weeks for results. I am learning patience in my old age and that is a good thing. Be Safe. RD