Sunday, June 21, 2009

Take another look.

As I was reading one of many blogs that I either subscribe to or have sent to me by RSS feed or email I came across this one. I have been following her for a very long time. She intersperses her delicious looking culinary offerings along with some down-home philosophy.

Last nite it was a review of a book that she liked Victoria Moran's Living a Charmed Life.

With my usual skepticism in tact, and the lateness of the hour I wasn't going to give this new author a read. Like "Oh, yeah" popped into my mind, "right" we all want that.

Much to my surprise this young woman made some very valid points: 1. See life as an adventure,2Make a mark.3)Take Risks 4)Be Disciplined 5). Become a Seeker 6) Live in the Biggest Possible World 7)Care Profoundly 8)Listen to My Instincts9)Appreciate Everything. 10) Be in This for the Long Haul.

This sounds good. How many of these can you honestly delete and tell yourself you've done that, been there. I came to the conclusion, I wish I had had this kind of HOW TO years ago. I could have perhaps saved myself, and others and been more keenly observant and done something differently.

What comes to mind (you knew this was coming). My past ten years here on the Eastern Shore.I've wasted them, I don't think I have learned that much, I've been too busy running things down and generally being miserable. Whose fault is're looking at her.

Now I have had a sort of epiphany....hey, girl, you are here, make the best of it. I'm not talking "settle", I don't think I have a "settle" bone in my body. But if you want a livable house...make it so. This is my first step. I embrace my new found neighbor, the eggman. I'm giving back. I'm trying to become part of a community that has previously made it clear they are not interested in getting to know me.

The list goes on. I'm pleased to say I feel much better about myself. Take yesterday for example. I never shop here, but needed to go to Dollar General. Before, I never so much as received a glance or hiya. THREE people asked me for directions....3 more than have spoken to me in the ten years I have been here. That is progress. I guess I must look more approachable? Could that be it?

Hope your day is filled with adventure, seeing is believing. Make it grand. RD


Jacqui Binford-Bell said...

Was talking just yesterday with some old mountain friends how we don't talk much to the "newcomers" until they have been here two years. Some 40% of them will move out so why waste our precious time.

We may lose track of the age of children but we all seem to miraculously know when someone has made it past that two year mark and is now acceptable.

And it is not all about wasting time. Newcomers seem to want to tell us how to run things - especially if they are from Texas. You can only hear "in Texas" so many times before you want to either puke or kill them. There was a t-shirt once that said "If Texas is so great why aren't you there." But we are trying to be less biased.

I also think something changes in the "newcomers" when they make an honest commitment to here. Like when you point out you shopped local recently and are trying to fix up your place. That shows in all sorts of ways we are very unconscious of.

I guess I am as settled here as I have been anywhere. As a military brat I always figured it was easy to pick up and move if I didn't like it somewhere.

RD said...

Yes, without a doubt I understand that mentality about newcomers. I can't say I did it myself, consciously in Carefree/Cavecreek. We just were members of groups, like cat stuff, art etc. and we were always looking for new members. And yes, the Californians always knew how to do it better.
However, now, no matter what you do, how you smile, wave your arm off, beep your horn...they turn their backs. Never in my life have I witnessed such out and out rudeness. But now that I give less of a damn, and no longer want to have a business, I feel a whole lot better. Fix my own surroundings to my liking and be done with it. At least I will have a sanctuary to retreat to. This past winter did open our eyes to the hospitality of the do for yourself.And you had better learn how to in a big hurry. No one to call up and and share information. Good lessons, also hard lessons. Margaret